“Rave?” I nod toward my son, and she’s on her feet, taking him from my arms.
With both hands free, I wrap them around Riley and hold her as close as I can. To see her upset like this guts me. All I want to do is make it better.
“I wrote him letters,” Riley explains. “He didn’t reply. I thought he didn’t want us.”
“Why didn’t you?” Brett asks, crossing his arms over his chest. I don’t take the move as offensive. I’m glad they were all here for her when I wasn’t. I know he’s coming from a place of friendship. At least he better be.
“I didn’t get them. I promise you if I’d known that the woman I’ve been in love with for years was having my baby, I would have been here. I don’t care what it would have taken to come home. I would have been here. As a matter of fact, I was working on coming home early when I found out about my dad.”
“Why?” Darcey asks.
“Riley.”
“Explain that.” This is from Jacob. He’s gripping the back of the couch. He has that look on his face that tells me he’s processing what he’s hearing right now and trying to form his own analysis.
“Raven wrote to us and even sent a picture of her with Riley at the baby shower. At first, I was broken by the news, but then I realized that it was the jackass who knocked her up’s loss. That I would be there for her and for her son. I knew that loving him would be easy because he was a part of her.”
“Wow,” Raven breathes.
“I was coming home. I wanted to be here when he was born. I wanted to be there for both of them. I got the call about my dad and left as soon as I heard. I was shocked to see you all in the parking lot that day. I knew she was getting close, but no one ever actually told me her due date, and I was too stubborn to ask.”
“So how did you end up here?” Bruce eyes the two of us.
“When Jake called me this morning, I jumped at the chance to get Riley alone. I’ve been trying since I’ve been home, but today was the first day that was possible.”
“Wait.” Raven holds her hand up to stop me. “Is that why you’ve been short with him?”
“You noticed that?” Riley asks.
“Yeah, I thought it was hormones from just giving birth.”
“It was that too,” Riley admits. “But mostly it was my anger at him acting as if nothing happened, that Hayes wasn’t his son. I ended up blowing up about it earlier, and he didn’t know.”
“Wow,” Darcey whispers.
“I’m so sorry that I lied to all of you. Can you forgive me?”
Raven stands and passes Hayes off to April. She moves around the coffee table and kneels before us. “Riley, you’re my sister, my only family, and there isn’t anything you could do that I wouldn’t forgive you for. I hate that you felt like you couldn’t tell me.”
“He’s your best friend.”
“You’re my twin sister.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
I relax my hold so that they can hug. They pull away and wipe at each other's tears before Raven stands and leans over the chair to hug me too.
“So what’s next?” Raven asks.
“Uh, I’m not sure I know what you’re asking.”
“With this.” She points at the two of us.
“We’re getting married,” I say at the same time Riley says, “We’re co-parenting.”
“Yeah, looks like you two still have some things to work out.” Bruce laughs.
“There’s nothing to work out. We’re not getting married. Just because we have a kid together doesn’t mean we have to get married. I’ve tried explaining this to him,” Riley says, pointing over her shoulder at me.
“And I’ve tried telling you that when a man loves a woman, he marries her,” I counter.
“So this is real?” Raven asks. “You know, just so that we’re all on the same page.” She smirks.
“This is real. It’s as real as it can get, and one day, my friend, I will be your brother-in-law, and our kids will be cousins. As for the rest of you-” I eye our group of friends “I hope that you all find the love of your life as I have. I do have one piece of advice for you. When you find that person, tell them. Don’t let fear of the unknown hold you back. Don’t let a possible misconception of the situation cause you to miss out on what could be precious moments.” I glance at my son, still sleeping in April’s arms.
“I’m sorry.” Riley turns to me. “I’m sorry you missed the pregnancy and him being born. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I had written a letter every day until I heard from you. I wish I would have told the people we love so they could have told you too. I have so many regrets.”
“It’s all in the past, Riles. We’re moving forward. No one hates you for the choices that you made. Certainly not me. It happened, and we’re where we are supposed to be now.”
“Yeah, changing a diaper,” April says, lifting Hayes away from her body.
“Yeah, he does that.” Raven laughs.
Riley stands, and so do I. “What are you doing?”
“He needs his diaper changed.”
“I can handle it.”
“I know you can, but I’ve missed out on enough. I told you that we’re in this together, and I meant it.”
“I don’t know, man. You might want to sit this one out,” Brett says, scrunching up his nose and backing away from the couch. “How can something so cute and so tiny smell that bad?”
“It’s the formula.” Riley laughs as she takes Hayes from April’s arms. “Come on, bub. Let’s get you changed.”
I follow her down the hall to the nursery. The one that was painted and the furniture assembled by my friends. I will remember that when they have their children and repay the favor. I’m glad she had them.
“You want me to do it?” I ask her.
“No, I can get it. You should go chat with everyone. It’s been a while since we’ve all been together.”
“They’ll be there when we’re done.” I move to stand next to her and place my hand on the small of her back while offering Hayes my index finger. He grips hard, and it reminds me of the day they were leaving the hospital. We did the same thing that day, and I felt something move inside my chest. I didn’t understand it at the time, but now I do.
He’s my boy.
Riley works quickly and efficiently, changing the dirty diaper with no mess, and is zipping him back up in his outfit in no time at all. She lifts him from the table and turns to face me. My hand that’s on the small of her back pulls her close. I press my lips to her forehead. “I love you.”
Her eyes soften and become glassy. “I love you too.”
“Marry me.” I know I’m not asking her like I should be. I know I need to get a ring, but I also know she’s going to keep telling me no. At least until she figures out that I would be asking her even if we didn’t make this handsome little boy she’s holding. I’m asking her because I can’t imagine my life without her. Without either of them.