Chapter 14
Ellianna
Tears blinded me as I threw everything into my cases. This time, I didn’t leave anything behind. No pictures. No trinkets. Not a single thread of anything that belonged to me.
He wanted to treat me like a whore and then tell me to get lost?
Then I’d go.
I wouldn’t come back. Not for anything. Not even my mother.
Slamming the biggest case shut, I put all my weight on top to hold it down so I could zip it closed, not caring if anything broke. I’d have to pay extra for how heavy the damn thing was, and it would cut into what little funds I had, but it would be worth it.
Throwing my purse strap over my shoulder, I dragged the two bulging pieces of luggage down the stairs and out to Lyla’s car. I’d leave it in the airport parking lot and then text my mom to have her send someone to pick it up.
Behind the wheel, I needed a few minutes to compose myself enough to be able to see in order to drive. Glancing in the rearview mirror, I was disgusted by what I saw. My hair was a tangled mess. There were tear tracks on my face. I’d only taken the time to pull on fresh underwear, jeans, and a hoodie before I’d started packing.
I hadn’t even showered.
Zachary’s come was still leaking out of me a little. Or maybe my torn hymen was still bleeding a bit. I hadn’t wanted to waste time using the bathroom to inspect the damage, but I was sore, the once-pleasurable ache nearly unbearable mixed in with the humiliation I felt.
Leaving the key fob in the glove box, I locked up after getting my cases out of the trunk. Someone back at the mansion would have an extra one to unlock it when they picked it up. Or they could call OnStar and get them to unlock it. Either way, it wasn’t my problem to worry about.
Inside, I had to max out both my credit cards to get the last seat on the early morning flight to San Jose Airport with an airline I’d never even heard of before, as well as cover the cost for the extra weight of my larger suitcase. By the time I got through security, I only had enough time to get to my gate before they were announcing the final boarding call.
I had an aisle seat, and it was right by the bathroom. The man beside me kept coughing the entire flight, and another passenger was in and out of the toilet as soon as the seat belt light disappeared.
And yet, I barely noticed the discomfort.
My mind was back in Virginia, in Zachary’s office. Feeling his lips on me. His hands touching every part of my body. Things had gone from zero to a thousand in the blink of an eye. I had nothing to compare to how good I’d felt, how wanted.
Having him want me was exhilarating.
And then, before I could even come down from the pleasure high, he’d destroyed me.
Then again, that was what Zachary excelled at.
No.
He wasn’t Zachary any longer. That was the name only I’d called him, because to me, Zachary was the man I’d loved. Even if I’d told myself time and again that I didn’t, I couldn’t keep lying to myself where he was concerned.
I did love him.
But I hated him more.
Now, he was just Judge. For years, he would get so pissed off that I didn’t use the name everyone else did. I wouldn’t put him in the same category of some deity like the rest of the world.
He was nothing more than a power-hungry jerk.
I couldn’t even remember why I loved that asshole.
Many hours later, exhaustion weighed me down as I used what little energy I did have to drag my luggage through the airport and out to grab a cab in the chilly pre-dawn morning. All I had was enough cash for the cab fare. If I went into the diner, I knew my boss would put me on shift, and then I would have some cash from tips. But they didn’t get nearly as much traffic during the summer months as they did when school was in session. It was right off campus, and the majority of students didn’t stick around over breaks.
At least I’d have a few dollars to get some groceries and anything else I might need.
My driver lifted the heavy cases out of the trunk outside my building. Thanking him, I dragged them inside and took the elevator up to my apartment. Everything was eerily quiet as I used my key. Stomach clenching because I had a sudden sense of doom, I opened the door and cautiously crossed the threshold.
The smell of rotting food, stale booze, and body odor made me gag. Flipping on the living room lights, I slowly turned and took in the destroyed view.
There were holes in the walls, a lamp was broken on the floor, where beer cans, red plastic cups, and bottles were littered. Some of them must not have been completely empty because I could see the distinct outline of wet spots. I saw cigarette holes in the carpet and on the couch. One side of the flat-screen television that had been mounted on the wall had fallen, the screen cracked in multiple places.
I moved forward enough to close the door, my feet getting damp from a half-full red cup. Wading through the debris, I walked into the kitchen where a keg sat beside the counter. The refrigerator door was wide open, showing a half pint of milk and more beer, most of them open and turned on their sides. One bottle was still dripping into a puddle on top of the vegetable crisper.
Dishes were stacked haphazardly in the sink. Some broken, all of them disgustingly dirty. Trash overflowed from the can, and I couldn’t even see the recycling container I kept beside it.
Too tired to deal with the mess, I walked back to the front door and picked up the smaller case. I was so distracted looking for the key to my room on my key ring that I didn’t notice my door was already open until I lifted my hand to unlock it. The door was slightly cracked.
Dread made my stomach protest, and I pushed it in, the squeak of the hinges making me cringe.
If possible, my bedroom was more destroyed than the rest of the apartment. More holes in the walls. The scent of what I could only guess was urine coming up from the carpet. The same trash that was throughout the other rooms was even deeper in here. And a guy I didn’t recognize was sleeping on top of my comforter.
Scared, I stepped back.
Turning, I moved toward Julie’s closed door. Heart pounding from fear and anger, I shoved it open and flipped on the overhead lights. Her room wasn’t destroyed at all. Messy like usual, but untouched by however many raging parties she must have thrown in the week I’d been gone.
She was passed out on her bed with yet another guy I didn’t recognize. Both of them were naked. I barely glanced at the bed and got an unpleasant view of them both before I turned and stomped out of the room, leaving the light still on.
Dragging my cases back out into the hall, I slammed the door and then stormed down to the ground floor, where the on-site manager had his own apartment. I had zero patience for Julie’s bullshit. Blaine, the manager, had known I was going to be gone for most of the summer.
He could deal with Julie and make her clean up her mess. I sure as fuck wasn’t going to be held responsible for the damage done to the place.
Frustration built inside me, making my throat tight and tears sting my dry eyes.
All I wanted was to go to bed, sleep for twelve hours, and then get on with my life. But there was no way I was going to sleep in that bed ever again. I wouldn’t be surprised if the mattress had become infested while I was gone.
Choking back a sob, I slammed my hand against the manager’s door and waited. It was still early, but Blaine went for a run first thing every morning. His boyfriend was some fitness junkie. I didn’t stop pounding my fist against the metal until it swung open.