“Well, you did,” she says simply. “Can you just leave me be?”
“No,” I say, coming up to the net. Hopefully, it’ll block her angry serves. “I want to know when your feelings changed.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she says, smacking her fist into the ball.
“It does. I want to know.”
She looks away, and I can see the tears gathering in her eyes. “When you were sixteen.”
Man. Whoa. Okay. “Wow, cradle robber, huh?” She flashes me a dark look. “Sorry, I say stupid things when I’m nervous.”
“Why are you nervous?”
“Because it’s you, Ally,” I say, staring at her in shock. “My best friend is admitting to having feelings for me since she was sixteen. That makes me feel stupid.”
“How?”
“Because I’ve always had this attraction to you,” I admit. “Don’t you remember, I tried to kiss you at prom?”
She looks back down at the floor. “I didn’t want a relationship at that time. And I knew, with you, it wouldn’t be just a roll in the sack—it would be forever. You were only eighteen, and I didn’t want to tie you down like that.”
It’s like she’s kicked me in the chest. If she had kissed me then, Jasmine wouldn’t have happened. “I thought you weren’t into me.”
She toes the gym floor, making a squeaking noise. “I was. I really was, but I was young and scared. I didn’t understand those feelings, and hell, I still don’t. But when you became a pirate for me and said why so beautifully, as if I was the only one you would fight for, I couldn’t hide my feelings anymore. I couldn’t resist you anymore. So, I acted.” She wipes her cheek, and my stomach drops. “But now I know that was a mistake.”
“How so?”
She meets my gaze. “Because it’s weird now. We don’t know how to act, and we don’t know what to do. It’s obvious.”
“What do you want to do?”
Her lips tremble as she throws the ball in the basket. “I don’t want to answer that.”
“Why?” I ask as she starts for me. I brace for impact, but she stops right in front of the net, meeting my gaze. “You can tell me anything, Ally.”
Her eyes search mine as she inhales deeply, letting it out through her nose. “I want to give us a chance.” She might as well have spiked a ball in my face, jump served it in my chest, and kicked me in the balls instead of saying what she did. I knew she felt things for me, but wanting to be with me? I hadn’t considered that. I thought she just wanted sex. I never have allowed myself to think this way. Damn it. “You can be attracted to me but not want to be with me. It’s okay. I can handle it.”
I blink, then narrow my eyes. Without really thinking, I take her by her shirt and pull her to me. Her body is flush with mine, her hands to my chest as I hold her hips. Her eyes widen as I stare at her through the net. I should move it, but I’m stunned by her eyes. They’re pleading with me to want her back, and she doesn’t have to plead for anything. She takes in a shaky breath, and I’m stunned to silence. She’s so beautiful, and I’ve always known this. Always. But it’s like I’m seeing her in a whole different light. A blinding light that is driving me into an asylum, but I can’t look away.
“I’m scared, Ally,” I admit, and I know I can because she is my best friend. Was. Is? My girlfriend? No. Wait, that’s crazy. What is happening?
She slowly nods. “Me too.”
Oh, well, that makes me feel better. Kinda. Not really. I let out a shaky breath. “There is this line and I want to cross it, but I’m terrified to lose you.”
“I know. It’s the same for me.”
“But I also can’t resist you.”
Her eyes snap back up at me, and I hold my breath. She turns up her lips as she asks, “No?”
“Fuck no,” I mutter before I pull her close and press my lips to hers through the net. It’s awkward and probably not sanitary, but I can’t think straight.
I don’t care.
I just want to kiss her.
Chapter Eighteen
Ally
Oh. Oh my.
Before the kiss deepens, Asher draws back and lifts the net to pull me closer to him. I’ll admit, I never thought of being kissed through a volleyball net. But now that I have been, I have to say, it was pretty damn romantic and belongs in all the movies and books. Asher snakes his arm around my waist before tugging me against him; his eye searches mine, and I swallow hard.
“So, we’re doing this?”
“I want to,” I say, dragging my hand up his neck.
“You sure you want to cross that line?”
I stroke my hand along his jaw and then my thumb along his bottom lip. His intake of breath could bring me to my knees if he weren’t holding me up. There is no other option; I want to cross that line and dance on the other side. With him. “I do. What about you?”
He doesn’t even answer, but I can see the battle in his eye. A noise rumbles in his throat before he captures my mouth once more, and holy shit, that’s hot. He holds me close with one hand as his other slides down over my ass to the hem of my shorts. He slides his fingers along the inside of the back of my thigh, and I groan in his mouth.
He pulls away and shakes his head. “You better stop that,” he says against my mouth, running his tongue along my bottom lip. “I have spent years acting as if I didn’t want you, Ally T. Unless you want me to take you to the nearest flat surface and have my way with you, I suggest you stop.”
I move my tongue along his, my eyes burning into his. “I want that.”
He looks scared. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, wanting you has kept me up many nights.”
He lets out a whistle. “Holy shit, we’re playing with fire, Ally T.”
I move my lips over his. I know we are. I know all this can go up in flames, but that’s a risk I have to take. I need to take. Nothing can hold me back anymore. I want him, and I want him desperately. The best part is I don’t have to wait. I don’t have to get to know him. I know him, I know his faults, and I’m about to learn the rest of him. His eye is so dark, and what the patch means turns me on even more. His fingers bite into my skin as he fights back his desire to drag me to the nearest flat surface. I’ve only seen sweet Asher, kind Asher, and geeky Asher. Never have I experienced sexy, hot, want to take me to bed Asher.
I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle him, but I am excited to try.
I feel myself trembling as I move my lips to his. Against them, I whisper, “Burn me, Ash B.”
He takes in a deep breath and then lifts me in his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist, and he holds me by my ass. I’m not sure what he is about to do, but the thrill is overwhelming. His hands are trembling, and suddenly, the most beautiful grin comes over his face. “I’m shaking.”
I grin against his lips. “Me too.”
“I can hardly see you.”
I snort. “You don’t have your contact in?”
He shakes his head. “No, and that bastard broke my glasses.”