“What’s wrong?” Dean grumbled. I blinked, breaking the staring contest I was having with the counter to face him. He was staring at me with a puckered brow. I couldn’t tell if he was concerned or pissed off.
“I think I need to have sex…” I blurted with zero shame. I didn’t have room for that particular emotion. Dean’s brows shot up and Asher cleared his throat. “Or a cigarette. I’m feeling very contradictory at the moment and it’s…unsettling.”
“Uh…” Dean stammered, clearly at a loss.
“Why’d you take off your rubber bands? Didn’t they help you when you were stressed?” Asher asked.
Stressed! I’ll be damned, I guess I am. I usually got pissed when I was stressed. At the moment, though, I couldn’t pin down one single emotion and just feel it.
A drink was definitely in order. Standing up, I made my way over to the pantry. Stepping into the temperature-controlled room, I scanned shelves with an array of unopened bottles. We were Irish, so it wasn’t a surprise Stefan had enough whiskey to get an entire army sloshed. Thankfully, he also catered to those with other tastes. I sighed happily when I found a bottle of Patrón. It wasn’t until I was walking out of the pantry with tequila in hand that I finally grasped everything Asher had said. My steps faltered. I stood there stunned as I locked my eyes on the giant sitting across the room. He was waiting, expectantly. How’d he…?
“How long did you spy on me?”
He smirked. Standing from his stool, he scooped up his empty plate. “The last two years,” he replied as he made his way over to the sink. “And we weren’t spying. We were there to protect you.”
I fought hard not to scowl as I pulled a shot glass and salt from different cabinets around the kitchen. “Whatever you were doing, you were very observant if you knew why I wore rubber bands. Did you hack into the college to get my test scores, too? Tap my phone? Bug my house?” I grumbled as I set my collected items on the counter. I didn’t return to my seat. Instead, I chose to stand on the other side of the island, across from Dean, who was watching as I uncorked the Patrón bottle and poured a shot. I preferred my tequila chilled when drinking it straight, but I didn’t really have the patience to prepare it that way. Wetting the back of my hand with my tongue, I dashed some salt on the dampened skin. I licked the salt away and threw back the shot. Damn, I needed that.
Asher leaned against the sink with his arms folded over his chest after placing his plate in the basin. “You didn’t answer my question.”
I shrugged. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not living among the sheep anymore. Showing weakness here is a death sentence.”
“You’re the boss’s daughter,” he said incredulously, like being Stefan’s daughter gave me the entitlement to get away with whatever the fuck I wanted. That was true in some cases. No one could touch me without facing the wrath of Stefan. But that wasn’t how I rolled. I wanted my enemies to hesitate to rise against me because of my own retribution.
“Aren’t bodyguards supposed to stand in my shadow, silent while looking intimidating? Emphasis on the silent part.” I pointedly eyed Dean because he too was an opinionated Chatty Cathy. I poured myself another shot, then repeated my salt regimen before tossing it back.
The sound of someone clearing their throat drew our attention. Louie was standing by the entrance leading in from the foyer. With his hands in his pockets, he looked apprehensive. “Can we talk?”
Without saying a word Asher pushed away from the sink. Dean stood from his stool and reached across the island to snag my tequila bottle. I glared at him as he and Asher left the kitchen, taking the Patrón bottle with them. What a dick. Once they were out of sight, I relented with a sigh. I guessed it was for the best. I needed to be clear headed later.
Looking back at Louie, I saw he hadn’t moved from where he was standing. From what I could read in his eyes, I knew what he wanted to talk about. I’d been trying to avoid thinking about last night all day. Remembering it once right after waking up this morning had made me cringe. Christ, I was such a hussy. Only hours after ending whatever Jamie and I’d had together, I'd pounced on his best friend. What was worse was if Louie hadn’t stopped us and Jamie hadn’t shown up, I would have slept with him—I wanted to sleep with him. I could still feel his lips on mine, which was making my heart practically gallop out of my chest.
“What’s up, Louie?”
My voice seemed to spark his resolve and he slowly made his way over to me. I'd never noticed how graceful he was when he walked or how his gray slacks stretched tight against his strong thighs with each step he took. He was a little on the leaner side but that didn’t mean his body wasn’t chiseled in all the right places. Fucking hell. He’s Jamie’s best friend. He’s Jamie’s best friend! He’s Jamie’s best friend!
A few golden strands of his medium length fringe that was normally slicked back escaped the rest and fell across his beautiful sapphire eyes. “We should talk about last night.”
We should. Given how I was reacting with him just standing two feet away from me, though, I didn’t know if I was ready. He was close enough now I could smell him. His warm earthy cologne caressed my nose, warming me from the inside out, making me want to slip off my suit jacket to help cool my flushed skin. Taking off any articles of clothing in front of him was a bad idea. I might find it hard to stop. So instead, I inched away from him, trying my hardest to be inconspicuous.
“We had a lot to drink…” I trailed off because I didn’t know what else to say.
He nodded slightly, eyes boring into mine. “Is that all it was, a drunken mistake?”
Oh, hell. Floundering, my mouth opened and closed. I ripped my eyes from his, dropping them down to the counter. “No. I didn’t intend for it to happen, but I don’t regret it.”
His sigh pulled my eyes back to him. His shoulders were sagged a little, as if relieved. “I don’t regret it either,” he said, slicking back the few escaped strands of sunlight colored hair. “Shockingly, Jameson’s not pissed at me. I thought I was going to wake to find my dick cut off this morning, especially since he knows how I feel about you.”
It was like someone had hit the pause button on my body. The act of blinking actually took thought.
He smiled sheepishly. “I shouldn’t be surprised you’ve never noticed. It’s always been Jameson for you and you for him.” I was getting ready to argue with him because despite recent changes, Jamie and I had never felt more than friendship for each other, especially Jamie, but Louie beat me to the punch. “That story I told you last night…the reason Jameson was so pissed a year ago and why I took him out to get his mind off things was because he had just found out you were dating that brief, Tom. The security team watching over you sent over pictures of you and him getting it on in his car along with their weekly report. It set Jameson off. Fuck, it set him off for months. Everyone could barely stand to be around him.” Louie shook his head while smiling.
“Why are you telling me about Jamie?” I was a little befuddled. I didn’t want to talk about Jamie. He and I were done. He'd hurt me. I killed people who hurt me. But I couldn’t kill him. I just couldn’t because he was…because I… My thoughts and feelings were so scrambled, I barely heard Louie speak again.