The worst part is that I can hear him saying that. It’s his defense mechanism—put others in their place before they can do it to him. “What did you say?”
“That I knew everything I needed to about destiny from reading my horoscope.”
I groan, just imagining the look on Ethan’s face when she said that. “I’m so sorry, Josie.”
“It’s okay. I’ve gotten to know him over the years. It’s obvious how much he loves you. That’s what matters.”
I bump her shoulder again. “It would be easier if I didn’t know how much my family wants the best for me. They just want to protect me from making a mistake.”
That “mistake” is out there right now playing pool chicken with another girl. Or maybe Anthony and Delia have gone off somewhere on their own. I press a hand to another twist of my stomach.
“So let’s summarize,” Josie says. “You found yourself attracted to Anthony and you decided it would be good to have a short fling and get over it. So you did. Except you didn’t get over it. But it doesn’t change the facts. He’s headed off with an urn of ashes, and you’re leaving for college. He doesn’t want strings, and you want everything tied in a neat little bow.”
“And double knotted,” I add.
She nods. “Your parents would never understand. Your brother would be an ass. Your best friend would wonder if you lost your mind. So, you fought and it’s over, crisis averted. Did I get all of that right?”
“You could have your own talk radio show.”
“Except,” she continues, holding up a finger for emphasis, “there’s one problem. You still like him. Wait!” She holds up a second finger. “You have a second problem.”
“I do?”
“Right now he’s out there with Delia, and you want him back.”
Frustration burns in the back of my throat. “I can’t want him back. That’s why I wanted a fling to stop liking him.”
“Which failed miserably.”
“You’re a real downer, you know that?”
“Thank you.” She shifts to face me, her eyes serious. “I know I told you to end things with Anthony—that he wasn’t the right guy for you. But I was also 100 percent certain that Garrett was not the right guy for me. Which means I know crap about this, other than the fact that sometimes our hearts are smarter than our brains. Maybe you should see where your heart leads.”
“But it’s not like you and Garrett.”
“It wasn’t like that with us at the beginning, either.” She shrugs. “Just remember. While you’re in here convincing yourself it’s nothing, he’s out there with Delia, who, by the way, I hear is a really nice girl along with being drop-dead gorgeous.”
“Oh Lord.” I straighten. “But what do I say? He’s the one who ended it this morning.”
“You ended it once and took him back. It only seems fair.”
I raise an eyebrow, thinking. “You’re right.” I give Josie a fast, hard hug. “I love you.”
She laughs as I head for the door. “And no boob punching!”
Chapter Thirty-One
Mai
“Do you have a minute?” I ask.
Anthony’s still in the pool, but thankfully the competition is over. I don’t have to ask who won. Tucker and Jasmine are taking a victory lap around the pool and dodging huge splashes from the other guys. Delia is standing by Anthony in the shallow end, but I don’t look at her.
Anthony hesitates, pushing his wet hair off his forehead. “I’m busy right now.”
I shift on the cool deck, wishing I’d put my shirt back on. I feel…exposed. The sun is down, the light a soft blue-gray, but it still feels like there’s yellow heat licking across my shoulders. “I left something in your car.”
A guy I don’t know calls out, “Your virginity?”
Anthony is suddenly at the edge of the pool, the water churning with white spray. He faces the guy, dripping water, a smile on his face that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Come again?”
The guy holds up a hand in apology. “Just a joke. Sorry, man.”
My knees go a little wobbly. My protector from all kinds of snakes. The gesture lights a hopeful spark in my chest. Until he faces me. He does not look happy. “You need whatever it is now?”
“Right now.”
Delia tilts her head up to him from the edge of the pool. “You’ll be back?”
He grabs someone’s crumpled towel off the cool deck and wipes his face, rubbing the cloth through his hair quickly. “That’s the plan.”
Not my plan. The words pop into my head, and I want to snap at this girl to back off. But Anthony is already on the move.
He’s supposed to be following me, but instead he leads, grabbing his shirt from a chair and pulling it on as he heads through the house and to the front door. He’s dripping water the whole way, his feet bare and his strides long. I have one second to look Josie’s way as she holds up her crossed fingers. Then he pushes open the front door, holding it until I’m through. He slams it shut behind us. My heart looks for a way out of my chest. No luck.
I take a breath of warm air, ordering myself to stay calm. The street feels blessedly quiet after the music and noise of the party. Shadows are creeping along the sidewalk. Even long summer days come to an end. But I don’t want to think about endings.
Anthony starts down the street. The pavement must be hot under his soles, but he doesn’t slow, not stopping until he gets to his car. He faces me, folding his arms over his chest. As unmoving as a statue. “We both know you didn’t leave anything in here. So what do you want?”
I lick my dry lips. My Brilliant Red is long gone, and I wish I had more on for courage. “There’s something I want to say.”
His voice is clipped, his eyes unreadable. “I think we said everything we needed to earlier.”
“No! It all happened too fast. You didn’t give me a chance to think, and I…I…” I swallow and take a breath. “We should talk, Anthony.”
He runs his fingers through his hair, tiny droplets flying to the pavement. “What do you want to say, Mai?”
“That we don’t have to end things. We can finish our fling.”
He rolls his eyes. “That’s real generous. But I’ll pass.” He starts back toward Jason’s house.
“Wait!” I cry. “Don’t leave.” I rush to catch up to him. “Please, can we talk?”