Was she ill? Was she having second thoughts about us? My mind wouldn’t give me a break. It wasn’t like her to not answer my calls.
I ran an impatient hand through my lightly gelled hair, then pulled on the cuffs of my expensive white dress shirt which I’d paired with a sharp navy-blue Dior suit and a vibrant, but tasteful, blue, green and white patterned tie. I always cared about my appearance, but I took more notice today and had chosen a pocket square in the green shade from the tie. I wanted to inspire Addison’s heart and libido the way just her slightest glance inspired mine. I smiled to myself as I made my way through the commons of the building toward the lecture hall. My anxiousness made me arrive early, though I chastised myself what I’d do for the twenty-five minutes until the start of class. No doubt drive myself crazy unless I could get in touch with Addison. I’d been happier then I’d probably ever been after our time together, but after so many unanswered calls and messages, I was nervous. I didn’t get nervous, I reminded myself.
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a couple sitting huddled together on one of the wooden benches that lined the outside of the hall. Normally, I wouldn’t have noticed because there would have been the hustle and bustle of students everywhere, but it was still several minutes prior to class time, and less active than when I usually arrived. The young man seemed to be comforting the young lady, his back was to me, and his head bent toward her. I couldn’t see the face of the girl because his arm was around her, but there was something familiar about him, but I couldn’t get a good enough look at him from across the large lobby.
His light teal plaid shirt rang a familiar chord, but then, I had many students, and probably more than one of them had a shirt like that. There was a black backpack at the girl’s feet, and a red one beside the man. I felt a pang of sympathy for them, maybe because of my own unease of the moment.
My phone rang as I entered the main hall and made my way down the stairs to the platform. Immediately, my eyes went to the area of the room where Addison usually sat, but all of the seats were empty. I continued walking and pulled out my phone.
“What is it, Gloria?”
“You know what it is! I need something from you, Jax. I can hold them off for another month, but that’s it. I need that manuscript!”
“God, I’m so fucking tired of this conversation. I said, I need a break.”
“No, you give me a break, Jax! This isn’t just your career, but mine hangs in the balance, too. I’ll lose all credibility and we’ll both be sued. If you don’t give a damn about yourself, think about me for a change! I told S & S I’d have three chapters to them by Christmas to keep your contract valid, but even that’s taking advantage of them. What the hell am I supposed to do?”
“Renegotiate it,” I growled.
“Coming from someone who doesn’t have to deal with that shit! It’s not that easy! There are millions of writers out there, Jaxon! Your little protégé for example, and what a great example you’re setting for her! You’ll just teach Addison she can violate her deadlines whenever she gets into a mood, and we both know that’s utter bullshit! Great lesson, Professor.” Her snarky tone grated, but if I were honest with myself, I had to admit that Gloria was right. I was being selfish.
I climbed the stairs to the platform and placed my brief case down on the desk. I ran my fingers along the edge of the worn wooden surface and my head fell forward. I’d allowed myself to be distracted from writing for the first time in my career. Maybe it was my growing feelings for Addison, or perhaps it was my apathy for my agent, that did it. Bottom line was she didn’t deserve this.
“Jax? Are you still there?”
I nodded, though she couldn’t see me. “Yes, I’m here.”
“Look, the holidays are coming, and maybe I can get them to wait a couple more months, but I doubt it. They’re pressuring me weekly.”
I inhaled deeply. “I’ll try to get something done.”
After a beat, Gloria responded. “Good. Thank you. Why don’t you go to the cabin over Thanksgiving?” I had already planned on taking Addison there, but I knew I wouldn’t get any work done if she were with me. She should inspire an amazingly romantic story, but instead, all I wanted to do was drown in her. Gloria read my mind. “Alone,” she said sternly.
“Alright,” I acquiesced.
“Really?” Excitement laced her tone.
“Yes. Maybe I’ll take an extra couple of weeks and leave early. My T.A. should be able to handle it. Maybe I just need to get out of the city.”
“Good boy,” Gloria purred, relieved. “Just let me know when you’re leaving, and I’ll try not to bother you, too much.”
“Work on selling Addison’s manuscript.”
“I have! I submitted it to Hatchette and to S & S. They’re reading it.”
“Even without reading it yourself? You said...”
“I know what I said, but why should she suffer just because I don’t have time?” She broke in. “If you say it’s great, it’s great!”
Relief flooded me. “Thank you, Gloria. I appreciate it. I’ll call when I’ve made some progress.”
“Thanks for finally coming around, Jax. We’ll get this back on track. Marcia will be absolutely thrilled!”
The timing was shitty, given what I was feeling for Addison, but Gloria was right. How could I counsel her on how to be a writer when I wasn’t even producing a book of my own?
The door to the auditorium opened, and I glanced up. Luke was walking in with a few other students. I noticed the shirt and the red backpack and instantly the hair on the back of my neck stood up. Was Addison the woman he was huddled around? Heat started to flood the skin of my chest and creep up into my face.
“I gotta go, Gloria.”
“Sure thing. I’ll be in touch!”
When I shut the phone down, I looked up and locked eyes with my TA as he came down the final few stairs and walked on to the platform. I licked my lips and stared him down.
He opened his backpack and took out his laptop. “You’re here early,” he said. I could almost smell the defiance on him.
“I am,” I stated the unnecessary.
“I wanted to talk to you anyway.”
“Would this be about being overworked?”
“I’m not overworked. I mean, yes, it’s a lot after Jeff quit, but it’s not about that.” Some of the bravado he’d shown only seconds before dissipated.
I wanted to see if he’d man up without exposing that Addison had told me the truth behind his request. “Then what is it about?” I challenged.
“I wanted to ask if it would be okay for Addison Tomms to help me with a manuscript.”
“Then why didn’t you instead of sneaking around behind my back?” I blurted.
“You’re one to talk. Why didn’t you tell me you were working on a book with her?”
I saw red. Addison was supposed to keep that a secret. My back stiffened, and my demeanor cooled. “Because it’s not your concern.”
“It’s not my concern that you think a student under me is better than me?”
“Don’t be immature. Obviously, she’s a good student… so were you. Your styles are different.”