“Um, we’re getting there, I guess?”
He nods slowly. “As much as I hate his guts, I have to admit he’s okay.”
My eyes go wide. “Oh?”
“I’m not ready to open the champagne to celebrate or whatever, but”—he shrugs—“I feel like we have a better understanding of each other now. I’ll refrain from punching him in the face the next time I see him. How’s that?”
I roll my eyes and scoff at his statement. Considering both Levi and Sol are still on crutches, I’m not worried about any ass-kicking between the two. “That’s really . . . I’m glad you two worked things out,” I admit feeling like a load has been lifted off my chest. “What about you? Have you talked to Jessica? How are she and the baby doing?”
He coughs into his fist. When he recovers, he mutters, “Both are doing well. Jessica’s staying with her mother in Portland.”
“Are you two planning to get back together?”
He shakes his head. “I just need a clean break to sort my shit out. Start fresh, you know?”
I nod as if I understand. The truth is, I don’t understand how he’s sitting there and not hating me for what I did to him. How he doesn’t hate Jessica for cheating on him. But I’m grateful, nonetheless.
“You’re a good guy, Levi.”
He chuckles and shakes his head. “If you knew the kind of shit running through my head, you wouldn’t say that.”
Instinctively, I reach for his hand on the table but freeze when his gaze tracks it. I pull back and shoot him an embarrassed smile. “You have a good heart.”
He waves me away with a hand, then asks, “Want another coffee?”
“I’m good,” I say, feeling much lighter than when we walked into this coffee shop. “I’m completely wiped.”
“Me too.” He leans down to retrieve something from his bag. The little yellow bottle. He shakes another pill onto his palm and downs it with his coffee.
Hmm. That’s the second time he’s taken one of those pills in such a short time.
“Is that for the pain?”
He nods, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “My leg’s killing me.”
“I, uh, I noticed you took one at the library.” He sets his mug down and sits back in his chair, his jaw clenched tight. “I mean—” I really need to shut up.
His lips curl into a scowl. “What are you suggesting, Grace?”
I raise my hands, palms facing him. “I’m not suggesting anything. It’s just an observation.”
He leans forward, nostrils flaring. “Not suggesting anything, huh?”
“Talk to me, Levi,” I say. “I really care about you, and I hate that you’re going through this.” I remember Sol telling me he took his pain medication three times a day to avoid being dependent on it. But I have a feeling telling Levi that wouldn’t go down very well. “Look, maybe you can get your leg checked, just to make sure everything’s healing as it should.”
“Don’t worry about me. I’m peachy.” He snatches his backpack from the floor and shoves his hands through the straps, then grabs the crutch. “You shouldn’t judge someone when you have no fucking idea what they are going through.” Levi positions the crutches under his arms and heads for the door.
Then he’s gone, leaving me staring at the door. The calm I was feeling before is replaced by dread. Dread because something’s really wrong with Levi. Dread because I have no freaking clue what to do. All I know is that I have to do something.
After paying for our coffee, I grab my bag and head out.
After tossing and turning the whole night, I finally crawl out of bed at five in the morning, exhausted. The image of Levi taking those pills hasn’t stopped playing in my head. Am I overreacting? People experience pain differently, so I can’t compare him with Sol.
But what if he’s really in trouble? I don’t know what to do or how to help him.
It’s all my fault, a tiny voice whispers inside my head. He wouldn’t be in that position if not for that car accident.
The guilt I have tried hard to suppress breaks free. I shake my head to clear my thoughts and reach for the clothes slung on the back of my desk chair. After changing into a pair of black leggings, a hoodie, and running shoes, I put on a beanie, then tiptoe to the door, careful not to wake MJ.
The sharp claws of the wintry morning bite through my clothes, making me shiver and regret leaving my warm bed. I push on, beginning with a slow jog down the deserted path. My feet pick up speed, the thump, thump, thump of blood pumping in my ears fills my head and drowns my thoughts. I focus on that sound as I make a couple of rounds down four blocks and back until my chest and legs burn from exhaustion. Then I trudge back into my dorm room, kick off my shoes, and collapse into bed.
“Wake up, Grace.” MJ’s voice pierces through my dreamless sleep, forcing me awake. I groan and mutter, “Go away, MJ,” then turn over, giving her my back, and pull the sheets over my head.
“Don’t you have to work today?” she asks.
“Nope.” I snuggle deeper into the sheets. Seconds later, I feel the bed dip and then MJ’s there, lifting the sheets and plastering her ice-cold front to my back.
“Ugh. What the hell, MJ?” I scramble away from her.
She laughs, scooting after me and hugging my waist. “Warm me. It’s your duty as my best friend.” She wiggles, pressing her chest to my back. “I’m cold. And you should be thanking me for getting us coffee.”
My eyes snap open, and I flip my body to face her. “A girl after my own heart. What time is it?”
“Almost ten in the morning. You smell like old sweat.”
Shoving her away, I sit up in bed with a laugh. “I went for a run, and when I got back, I was too tired to shower.”
“Still having nightmares? I thought it’d gotten better.”
Climbing over her body, I reach for the coffee on my desk. “Nope.” I tip the cup to my lips and drink deeply, then swallow and continue. “Levi and I went for coffee yesterday.”
She sits up, her eyes wide. “What? When? Did he say something? Oh my God, I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”
“I’d already fallen asleep by the time you came in last night. Where were you anyway?” I slide her coffee across my desk toward her, then take a big sip from my cup.
“Study group. Let’s circle back to Levi. The suspense is killing me.”
“Something’s going on with him. It’s just a feeling, you know.”
“Oh? Like what?”
Before I can respond, my phone starts ringing on the desk. I grab it and see Sol’s name flashing on the screen.
My heart flips inside my chest, and a smile takes over my face as I answer the call. “Hey, you.”
MJ mouths, “Sol?” I nod and set my coffee on the desk, then scoot to sit on the edge of the bed.
“Hey, Gracie.” His voice. My kryptonite. “Where are you?”
“Um, why do you ask?”
“Just answer the question,” he says with a soft laugh.
“In my dorm room.” The call disconnects immediately. I pull the cell from my ear and look at it. “Did he just hang up on—” A knock on the door interrupts me. MJ and I exchange a look, then she jumps, dashes to the door, and swings it open.