She has to go back. To Virginia and to that tiny prison.
Thea trembled in my arms, her hands clenching and unclenching my shirt. “Stay with me, Jimmy,” she begged. “Please…”
“I won’t leave you,” I said. “I swear. Not for a second.”
“If it makes things easier, I can sedate her,” Dr. Chen said, with a nod at Rita.
“No,” Thea cried, her hands releasing my shirt. “No. I’m not going back drugged up. I want whatever time is left.” Now her tone turned strong and defiant. “Can we have a moment, please?”
She waited until everyone backed away, then put her forehead to mine, letting her hair fall to shield us.
“I’m so fucking scared, Jimmy.”
“I know you are, and I hate it,” I whispered. “I’d give anything to do this for you.”
“Remember for me.” Tears spilled down her cheeks and over my fingers, and then she pulled me to her, her voice tremulous. “Remember us… when I can’t.”
A hospital van idled in front of the hotel in the early hours as dawn started to break over the horizon. Clutching my hand, Thea walked to the van, stopping once as a blank spot hit. She’d had three more blanks as we packed our hotel room and made our way down.
Dr. Chen and Rita hovered close, but Thea refused to let them examine her in any way.
“It’s almost over,” she said dully, curling up against me in the van. “You can have me when I’m gone.”
Rita shook her head as her eyes met mine. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.
I nodded and held Thea tight to me and sang as the van pulled away from the hotel. I sang to Thea or hummed to her the entire ride, as her blank spots grew wider and deeper. Mercifully—and yet frighteningly—she slept for most of the drive.
“She’s been sleeping a lot,” I said to Dr. Chen. “Is that supposed to happen?”
“It’s the Hazarin leaving her system. External stimuli become draining and make the onset of her amnesia more aggressive.”
“Will there be another d-d-drug?” I asked, trying to keep my shit together. “Is M-M-Milton going to try again?”
Dr. Chen’s expression didn’t change, filling me with dread. “Things in Sydney are quite chaotic right now. It’s unclear where Dr. Milton or his project’s funding stand. However, his procedure is still a breakthrough in medical science and the entire neurological community is rallying around its potential. Obviously, it’s the medication—the bonding agent—that requires more work. I think the chances of a new drug coming out are very good. I just can’t say when.”
Months. Years. Never.
I held Thea tighter.
We arrived at Roanoke Memorial Hospital around three that afternoon. Thea was groggy and sluggish as I carried her inside, refusing the gurney that was brought out. Dr. Chen and her staff directed me to a room, where I laid Thea on the bed.
Her eyes fluttered. “Jimmy?”
I brushed the hair from her face. “Shhh. Rest now, baby.”
She fell back to sleep. “Now what happens?” I asked Dr. Chen.
“Now you leave.”
Delia stood at the door, her eyes soft when they took in her sister on the bed but glinting coldly when she trained them on me. A man stood behind her—thin, hawkish nose, and with a gentleness that made Delia look even more rigid. Roger Nye, I guessed.
She and I stared each other down.
Inhale. Exhale.
“I want to be with her as much as possible,” I said slowly. “Before she goes away again. And after—”
“I think you’ve been with her quite enough. You’re done here.”
My fists and jaw clenched. “That’s not what she wants and you know it.”
“Ms. Hughes,” Rita said softly. “Don’t do this. They’re together.”
Delia’s jaw clenched. “I’ll bet.”
“I promised to visit her every day,” I said. “That’s partly why she agreed to stop taking the medication.”
“She never would’ve risked her life over it in the first place, if you hadn’t taken her away.”
“She wanted to go,” I said. “She would have gone without me—”
“Can we please take this conversation outside?” Dr. Chen said, ushering us into the hallway. I could hardly stand to leave Thea’s side, but I had to make Delia understand without losing my shit or she’d ban me forever.
“Now let’s have a friendly discussion,” Roger said.
“She broke out of Blue Ridge with your help,” Delia said, ignoring him. “She has a tattoo that she’s not going to understand when the medication wears off.”
“So fucking what?” I hissed. “She’s a grown woman who can get a tattoo if she wants one.” I sucked in a breath to fight for calm. “We kept in contact. We knew you were worried about her—”
“Don’t tell me how I was feeling about my sister. You have no idea how much I love her.”
“I love her too,” I whisper-shouted. “You’re not the only one who loves her, who would fucking die for her. Who wants to protect her—”
“Protect her? You took her away from the safety of medical professionals so you could sleep with her. You took advantage of what she thought she felt for you—a big, strong man willing to rescue her from her prison.”
My fingers tore through my hair. “You’re out of your goddamned mind. You never listened to her. You can’t hear her. You never could. Or worse, you fucking could and chose not to.”
Delia’s eyes flared again, and a heavy anchor of dread sank to the bottom of my stomach. I’d fucked up.
“I’ve listened to you for the last time. Go. Get out of this hospital or I’ll have you arrested.”
Fuck me to fucking hell.
“Delia, wait. I’m sorry.”
“Get. Out.”
Two hospital security guards talking down the hallway looked up and grew curious. They started toward us from one direction, and then, like an ancient apparition, Alonzo Waters was at my side.
“Ms. Hughes,” he said with a nod of greeting. “Jim. How we doing here, folks?”
“Everything okay?” one of the guards asked.
“We’re fine,” Roger said. “Aren’t we? Let’s all remain calm.”
“I am perfectly calm,” Delia said, never taking her eyes from me.
I glared right back. “I have to be there when she wakes up,” I said, my stony voice cracking. “I promised her.”
Delia tilted her chin. “That may be, but I’m here now. That’s all she needs.”
A tsunami of emotion raged in me, my limbs vibrated with it.
Alonzo put his hand on my arm. “Come on, Jim. Let’s take a breather. It’s been a tough day for all.” He looked at Roger. “We’ll take some time and regroup when everyone’s had a chance to consider what’s best for Miss Hughes, yes?”
Roger nodded, and his sympathetic expression kept me from flying into a rage and tearing down the goddamn walls of this place.