I don’t care.
“I believe that you think you want what's best for him, Natalie, I honestly do. I believe there isn’t, has been, or ever will be anything sexual between you and Mason. I appreciate you trying to clear the air. There’s too much pollution inside my husband, and you are not helping by filling it with more toxic waste. Consider this a warning; if I find out you’ve gone to Mason pushing for this match or any other, I will call you out; I will humiliate you worse than before. We aren’t working together as in never again. You are done working for my husband too. As of right now, you are no longer Mason’s agent. Now, do me a favor and stay away from him while we work this out, please.”
The minute she turns onto Main Street, I run to the beach, slip off my flip flops, and I pray, God do I pray she stays out of my way. After, I scream and scream and scream.
Chapter Thirteen
Mason
I burst through the door of Nuts & Bolts. Panic starting to suck the life out of me. Eden left me days ago, and I’ve no clue where she is. I’ve checked everywhere I could possibly think she’d be. I’ve even waited at Aubrey and Chance’s in hopes I’d catch her.
Desperation. It’s terrifying me.
I want to go back to before when everything was right between us. I want to forget about boxing, forget that I wronged my wife, but I can’t do any of that if I can’t find her.
Every second I’m away from her is bringing in dying embers and dwindling hope. If she isn’t here, all I got left is the hope she shows to Cody’s fight.
She has too. Eden isn’t the type to let a person down. Not like I have her.
All I’ve done since taking a brutal verbal beating from Gage, a stack of disappointment from Cody, and begged them to understand how badly I needed to box is work then go home to an empty house and drink until I pass out. I’m living off whiskey and weights, pushing myself to the limit.
Of course, Cody and Gage didn’t buy my excuse one bit. And, of course, I didn’t let on Eden thinks I’m in denial. If I believed it, I would have.
It tore me up to wipe my ass off the floor of the ring and spill my guts out. I figured they’d walk out and tell me to go to hell. I was sure I’d ruined it with Cody. All I thought was fuck; this kid has a fight coming up, he can’t be stressing because of me. But when he told me straight up that I saved him from following in his Father’s footsteps, then went on to reaffirm that I was family to him and blood or not family sticks together, therefore, he wasn’t going to turn his back on me, I knew we were okay.
Gage wasn’t as forgiving at first. I can’t blame him, not after what I hid from him, so I sat there and took his wrath.
They both said they’d lose respect for me if I didn’t tell Eden I’d been sparring.
I don’t come close to deserving either one in my corner. But I’m glad they are there. I’ll do everything I can to make sure they stay there. I won’t disappoint them again.
My wife, though, she’s a whole other story. I’m flipping my shit with worry.
Goddamn her for leaving me. If Eden thinks I’m going to lie down and allow her to walk away, she has another thing coming. I will fight my way out of the grave I’ve dug if I can find her.
There’s a miserable void inside of me. It’s like a thousand thoughts are twisting through my overcharged mind. They vibrate with the magnitude of an earthquake. They are shaking everything inside of me violently. I’m hearing the freight train getting closer, and I can’t seem to jump off.
This is the longest I’ve ever gone without sleeping next to my wife. She won’t answer my texts or calls, and when I stop by the cottage, there’s no sign whatsoever she’s been there. It’s like she’s vanished into thin air.
Enough is enough. I have to find my wife, I won’t lose her; I can’t.
“Mason, what are you doing here?” Naomi, Eden’s employee, asks with annoyance in her tone. Eden told her. That’s just great. I guess I can’t blame her being that Aubrey is across the country.
The worrisome look on her face, nor her greeting is her usual norm. The woman is typically hugs, kisses, and pleasant when she sees me. I don’t come here that often, and I should. This place is remarkable. It’s bright, cheery, and Eden has done so well with it.
It has her written all over it.
Caring and generous.
“It’s obvious what I’m doing here.” I'm rude, an inconsiderate asshole. At this point, I’m at the end of my rope to find Eden; I’ll spit nails at anyone who tries to keep her from me.
I’m struggling for control, silently screaming at Naomi to tell me where my wife is. Seeing her is the only thing that will spool me back from unraveling at the seams.
I rake an unsteady hand through my hair, ready to pull every strand out.
I’m dying. Slow and sure.
“Mason, please do not make this harder on you or Eden. You shouldn’t be here. It’s not good for you to be driving either when you aren’t calm.” I almost laugh. Instead, I blink. Wetness forming in my eyes — a terrifying deadness is flowing through me.
I dread the seconds, the minutes, hours, days to come. What the hell do I do if she’s gone forever?
Without answering, I glance around the place looking for Eden. Wanting to see those dark locks of hers, those remarkable eyes, that body I need to get lost in.
Her voice. I need to hear it.
I have this horrible sensation in my gut she isn’t here, which means one of a few things. She’s at the bank, went to grab something to eat, or she took the hell off and disappeared as she threatened.
It’s the last, I’m sure of it.
Oh, Jesus. God, help me get control over what I’ve done before I sink into quicksand.
“Where is she? I’m here to beg, crawl on my hands and knees. I’ll do whatever it takes to win her back. Is Eden here?” I rush toward Eden’s office in desperation. Nothing about what is happening between us will calm me until we work it out. I’m losing her with each passing second. I will tear this place apart, looking for a clue to where she’s gone.
I open the door to her office, the storage room. I even dart up the stairs and kick in the wooden door to the large room that runs the entire length of the building. Wood splintering as the thing falls right off the hinges. We’d talked about turning this place into an apartment to rent soon. She isn’t here. It’s as empty as my chest.
I become agitated, tugging my hair, rubbing my eyes as I blast back down the stairs to find out where she is.
I’m unraveling.
“Eden is my wife, where is she?”
I’m on the verge of losing my goddamn mind. I’m out-of-place in this world without the woman who grounds me.
My heart sinks into my shoes, despair drying like cement in my veins.
God, fucking help me.
“I’m sorry, I just,” I close my mouth when I glance at Naomi. She’s wringing her hands, tears falling down her face. I’m scaring her.
Shit.
“Mason, listen to me for a minute. For your own good, you need to walk out of here and calm down. Take a walk on the beach or something.”
Or something? How about if she tells me what I want to know? That’s what I need.