Home > Regrets(4)

Regrets(4)
Author: Nicole Dykes

“Yes. Come on, Pea. We don’t have time.”

I roll my eyes and sigh but ultimately do what he asks because I would follow Colt anywhere. We dive into the closet as he closes the door behind us, pulling me to his body in the cramped closet.

“You have to stop mouthing off to Linc if you’re this afraid of him,” I tease, my voice a whisper in the dark.

He laughs, and I feel his shoulders shake with the laughter as my hands rest on them. “I’m not afraid of him, and he had it coming. He’s always messing with you.”

I laugh at that. Linc is really good at giving me a hard time, but I don’t mind. It’s friendly fire. “You don’t have to stand up for me.”

I can’t see him clearly in the dark closet, but I feel his hand brush the hair out of my eyes as if he instinctively knew it would be there. “I’ll always protect you, Pea.”

I pull a shaky breath into my lungs. Being this close to Colt and all alone with him is a lot for my body to take. My palms feel clammy, and there’s a butterfly feeling in my lower stomach. He’s become my best friend over the past three years, strong and confident like Linc, but he’s kind and just plain good. People follow Linc out of fear, but they follow Colt out of trust.

“I have no doubt. But you don’t have to.”

“Hey, Pea?”

I don’t know what he’s going to ask, but for whatever reason, it seem significant. “Yeah?” I breathe.

“Can I be your first kiss?”

The butterfly feeling swirls up toward my heart as I nod. “Yes.”

I place a hand over his heart, and I lean in closer to him, our foreheads brushing as his heart thunders under my hand.

I feel his lips brush over mine, and I struggle to control my breathing. I’ve thought about this moment constantly over the last few months. It wasn’t ever a question of if it would happen, it was an inevitable when.

He presses his lips to mine, and I feel the same electrical jolt I feel when our hands touch as we kiss softly in the dark of the closet, but it doesn’t last long.

The door rips open, and we both jump back as Linc stands in the doorway letting the light in and looking at us with a suspicious eyebrow lifted. “Well, well, well. What do we have here? Did I get to witness the first kiss?”

“Don’t be a jerk, Linc,” Colt growls at his brother who looks way too amused.

“It’s about time. God knows you’ve wanted it long enough, moaning her name in your sleep and shit.”

Colt looks embarrassed, but I put my hand on his to assure him I find it sweet that he dreams about me. I dream about him too.

“Linc, get out of here. I’m sure you can find someone to occupy your time.” I look up at Linc who’s wearing a sly smirk on his handsome face.

He’s fourteen now and, according to Colt, already has a reputation at their fancy prep school.

Unfortunately, we’ve now drawn the attention of Mrs. Sterling who walks to stand next to Linc, looking down at Colt and me in the bottom of the closet, curiosity swimming in her eyes. “What are you two up to?”

“Yeah . . .” Linc is being coy. “What are you two doing?”

I look over at Colt, who seems frozen. He truly cares about what his mother thinks about him, and the last thing in the world he wants to do is disappoint his parents.

I look up at Mrs. Sterling. “We’re playing hide and seek.”

Linc laughs out loud at my ridiculous lie, and Mrs. Sterling eyes me suspiciously. “Hide and seek?”

It does seem pretty out there. Maybe some twelve-year-olds still play hide and seek, but I don’t think I’ve played it since I was six. “Asher wanted to play.” I shrug, leaning into my lie, and I notice Linc’s eyes on mine. Is that pride on his face?

Mrs. Sterling smiles. “Oh, well that’s nice of you guys to play along then. Dinner will be done soon.”

We thank her, and when she leaves, I take a deep breath and turn to Colt who looks slightly disturbed. “You lied to my mom.”

“I uh . . .”

“She saved your ass,” Linc chimes in. “You think Mom would be happy that her little golden child was playing Seven Seconds in Heaven amongst her carefully selected fluffy bath towels?”

I smirk slightly at Linc, but then look at Colt’s deadly serious eyes. He does not like lying.

“I’m sorry.”

He smiles and climbs out of the closet, reaching for my hand. “It’s okay, let’s go find Asher so it’s not a total lie.”

Linc rolls his eyes as we head back down the stairs.

I love their house and their entire family, but as I walk past the silver mirror in the staircase, I look at my refection, my long dark hair and ratty clothes . . .

I know I don’t belong here.

 

 

“Linc! Are you home?”

I open the sliding glass door, coming back in from the backyard when I hear my sister’s voice bellowing throughout my house.

“There you are.” She throws her hands up as she tosses her handbag on my couch. She’s dressed up for her job at our dad’s investment firm in Kansas City.

“What are you doing here? It’s a workday.”

Manhattan is a good two and a half hours from Kansas City. “I called, but I guess you didn’t have your phone on you.”

Nope. “What’s up?”

“Nothing. I just took off early today and thought I’d catch up with my brother.”

I eye her from across the room, knowing she’s full of it. She’s here to check up on me. “Right. You want something to eat?”

“No thanks.” I notice her looking around. “Penelope here?”

“No.”

“Where is she?”

Things with P have been rocky, and Lola knows that. But she has no idea how bad things have gotten. To my family, she’s still the shy, sweet girl they all first met. “She’s studying on campus.”

Lola is too much like our mother. Her eyes narrow in my direction as she takes a couple of steps toward me. “Studying? Penelope hates to study.”

I shrug, hoping she’ll drop it. “I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Tell me the truth, Linc. Last time I saw Penelope she looked like death. She doesn’t call. She doesn’t text.”

I groan as I flop down on the couch, propping my feet up on the coffee table. “Fine, Lola. She’s more than likely fucking some random guy on campus. Probably drunk, but who knows? Maybe even high so she doesn’t have to feel.” I look up at my sister. “That make you feel any better?”

Penelope moved in with me in the fall, and with it now nearing the summer, I’m getting tired of keeping her secrets. My sister sits in one of the chairs, her posture still perfect as she keeps her back straight and crosses her ankles. “Is that true?”

I swallow tightly and run my hands through my hair. Penelope was a foster kid from the wrong side of the tracks. She had it rough, and my family knew that, but they still held her high. They thought she was like Colt.

And maybe she was once.

“Lola . . .” My eyes meet my sister’s, and I don’t really wish her any harm. I don’t want to shatter her perfect perception of Penelope. “We’re fine. You don’t need to drive all this way to check up on us.”

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