The police had kept a watch on him and knew he was going to target me. Shawn also knew and it turned out Cooper knew as well. My head was pounding as we went over and over our statements, before finally being allowed to go to bed.
The cops told us to do something, but I was distracted by the arrival of Jan. I couldn’t hear anything around the buzzing in my ears, so I just nodded until no one was speaking to me anymore. I sat numbly on the sofa, watching as Cooper showed the cops out and as soon as they were gone, I sprinted to my room, locking the door behind me again.
The next morning, I woke up and there was a note under my bear beside my bed. I wanted to tear the note up, but instead, I shoved it into my school bag. As I went downstairs the house became colder and colder until I shivered in my shorts and tank. Coop walked out of the family room, followed by Jan.
I ignored them and padded barefoot along to the kitchen. As I opened the door to the kitchen an arctic breeze whipped around my ankles and I shivered. Glass littered the floor because the windows around the kitchen had been smashed. I almost walked into the mess needing caffeine, but Coop’s hand closed over my wrist.
I sucked in a frozen breath and turned towards him.
“Coop?” My voice was low as I shivered in the cold. His eyes locked on mine the moment I turned around.
“Did you read my note, Bails?” he asked slowly, his eyes roaming all over my face. I shook my head, and he ran his fingers through his hair. “Okay, come find me when you read it, please?”
He bent down and pressed his lips to mine, before turning and walking away.
The kitchen was so cold that polar bears would have been comfortable in it. There was no way I could grab a coffee only dressed in my pj’s, so I decided to go back to my room and get dressed.
I padded along the floor and as I climbed the stairs, I kept my mind intentionally blank, but as I passed Coop’s room I glanced in and saw him and Jan sitting on his bed. She was facing away from me but curled on her side in Coop’s arms. My breathing stuttered and Coop’s eyes met mine. His look was sad, and his eyes sparkled as though he was pleading with me, but I shook my head with tears in my eyes as I turned away.
His sigh followed me as I went back into my room and crawled under my duvet, pulling it over my head as I shivered with cold and heartbreak. After a while hiding from the world, I drifted off into sleep. When I woke up Coop was snuggled in beside me. My head was on his arm, my arm flung across his bare waist, and my leg sandwiched between his
As I gasped in surprise, he opened his eyes and smiled at me.
“Coop,” I whispered hoarsely, and he smiled widely, licking his lips as he looked at me. I could feel him hardening against my stomach and when he brushed his lips against my own, fireworks went off in my stomach. I felt like a Catherine wheel on the Fourth as fire raced through me from his warm touch and I shivered against him. His gaze heated, and he grazed my lips with his again.
As our breathing sped up, there was a knock at my room door and Jan walked in. Her eyes widened in surprise as she switched on the light, seeing us. I buried my head in Coop’s neck, hiding from the light. Coop spoke and his voice rumbled in his chest. “Jan, what happened?” His voice was hoarse with desire, but there was something else in his voice I couldn’t identify.
She spoke again and I pulled back slightly to look at her.
“I tried to go home, but I didn’t make it. The road into town is blocked and since I didn’t want to sleep in my car, I needed to come back here.” Coop shrugged away from me and the coldness at his distance worried me. He crawled out of my bed and busied himself looking for his clothes.
As he pulled them on, Jan watched him with appreciation in her eyes, and whenever she caught me watching Cooper, her mouth narrowed into a thin line. She shook her head at me, and I knew she was playing some sort of game with Coop. I suddenly realized that the letter Coop left me would have the answers.
He stood up, brushing my hand as he did, and he walked towards her at the door. Her face lit as he left me lying in the bed and my gaze sharpened. Coop caught my glare and shook his head at me. He closed the door and I wanted to smack him around the face. He made me feel like a silly little girl, but he’d just walked out of my bed to another girl.
“FUCK!!” I screamed into my pillow, so sick of the whiplash he was giving me. He needed to decide if he wanted me, really wanted me once and for all because I was so over all this shit. I got up and headed towards the big bathroom for a soak in the tub. It was his bathroom, but I knew he wouldn’t mind me wanting to escape from my emotions for a little bit.
I opened the door from the hall and his room door was open. He was standing in the middle of the floor, and Jan stood in his arms. As I stood in the dark bathroom, she leaned up and brought her lips to his, and while the knife in my chest turned, he kissed her back. I backed up knocking one of the glass candles over. His eyes shot to mine, and he pulled away with a look of abject horror on his face.
I spun and ran back to my room. “Bailey,” he called after me, but I ignored him, locking my room door and hiding in my closet as my tears fell. A second later my door opened and the light broke in. Coop sat on the floor and reached for my hand. I couldn’t figure out how he’d gotten into my room when the door was locked, but I didn’t want to even try to work that one out.
I snatched it away from him, and he looked down at his lap. “That wasn’t what it looked like, Bails.” His voice was soft, but he couldn’t look at me. My body shook and my heart pounded loudly in my ears as my anger threatened to overwhelm me.
“Really, Coop? You kissing Jan not ten minutes after you kissed me isn’t what it looks like?” my voice broke as I asked him.
His sharp intake of breath told me I’d hit my mark and when he lifted his eyes, I could see the conflict in his eyes. “She needs me, you don’t know what she’s going through, but please trust me?” His eyes swam, and he glanced down at the ground again.
“Trust you? How can I trust you? Maybe this… us isn’t a good idea.”
He sucked in a rough breath and his hands lifted to his face, and he looked at me completely destroyed.
“You don’t want me anymore?” he asked with his voice cracking on each word. “Please, please don’t do this, Bailey?”
His eyes spilled over, and I leaned back against the wall, watching him impassively, while my heart begged me to hear him out.
“Coop, I do want you, but this is so complicated. It hurts and every single thing is against us. Do you want me?” He nodded and moved over, wrapping his hand around my neck. His breath was ragged as he held me a millimeter from his lips.
“Bails, when I see you, all I want is you. I haven’t been able to think straight for the last year. You’ve changed everything and I love you so much, so I’m asking… no… begging you, please just give me a chance. Just one more chance and I’ll prove to you how in love with you I am…” His lips pressed to mine, and he kissed me hard. My breathing stuttered and as much as I wanted to give him a chance, I couldn’t risk him breaking my heart.
“Coop, no. I can’t.” I shook my head, and as he broke apart in my arms, he sobbed.
“I’m sorry, Bailey. I’m so, so sorry.” Every tear rubbed at me like salt into a wound and I wanted so much to let him in. I spoke again, my voice thick with tears.