Yeah, no thanks.
“Do you go to those things?” I asked, leaning back in my chair. The hard metal dug into my back, but I didn’t care. These chairs were not comfortable no matter how you sat in them; the pains of being a folding chair in a room that constantly needed to be moved around.
“Those things?” Bobbi echoed, still smiling. “Yeah, I do. You saw that picture of me at homecoming with Brittany and her crew.” She shook her head, muttering, “They went around and took pictures with everyone. Out of literally everyone in the whole school, my look was voted to be the ugliest. Can you believe it?” She chuckled, although it was a dry sound.
Right. Totally forgot that. My bad.
“Everyone goes to the dances,” she finished, shrugging, done talking about Brittany.
“Surely not everyone,” I mused. Wondered if Vaughn went to the dances, if he asked anyone. He did look ridiculously handsome in a suit, even with those hand tattoos…wouldn’t mind those hands holding me close, but that was a daydream to be locked away and never thought of again.
You’d think I would’ve learned my lesson after Archer and his one-eighty, but nope. I didn’t.
“Pretty much everyone,” she said, shrugging. “The best part is dressing up and making fun of everyone else’s dance moves.”
“Have you got a date yet?”
“No, I usually go stag. It’s more fun that way.”
I wasn’t sure how a dance could be more fun if you went to it alone, but maybe she was right. I’d never been to a dance before, mostly because I didn’t see the point. Mom and her no-dating rule. Of course, her rule didn’t stop me from hooking up and dating occasionally, but it always fizzled out at the end.
Things with me never lasted, though sometimes I did wonder if I sabotaged them purposefully, not wanting to end up like my mom. A single mother working hard just to make ends meet.
She playfully bumped shoulders with me. “You should come. It’ll be fun.”
I gave her a smile that probably looked as fake as it felt. “I’ll think about it.” Hint: I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t think about it at all. If I could just keep my head down and survive the last six months of senior year, that would be great.
When the bell rang, I all but ran out of the classroom. Bobbi seemed content to keep talking about the winter formal, but my mind was still on this week’s problem: the money. I had to get money, fast. I’d checked online for some local jobs, and there was nothing that would pay well. All part-time jobs that, frankly, would take me forever to save up.
Walking through the halls, I avoided bumping into anyone as I made it to my locker. Since Midpark was so big, some kids were hurrying to their next class, and others, like me, were heading to lunch. I shoved in my books and took out my bagged lunch, not even that hungry. My mind was so focused on the money that the last thing I wanted to do was eat my cheese and crackers.
Yes, I had cheese and crackers every day. It was simple, easy, and Mom could pack it for me while whipping up Ollie’s morning coffee.
My feet slowly drew me to the cafeteria, and I shuffled to the table I shared with Vaughn. It wasn’t like I could ask him for money. It was possible he’d forgotten my inquisitiveness about him and his brother and their business with Ollie, but maybe not. He knew he didn’t tell me everything, and after seeing those ashes in the other study…
Something wasn’t right here, and I had to know what it was. I didn’t like walking around, being blind.
Vaughn had bought a lunch today, today’s meal pizza. Just pizza, as if two pizza slices were enough of a meal. For me it would be, but for him? I’d make a joke about teenage boys eating lots, but Vaughn hardly ever ate everything that was on his trays during lunch.
I sat across from him, slowly unrolling my bag, not saying a single word as I reached for my crackers.
Eyes so dark they were nearly black, Vaughn watched me with bored disinterest. I never could tell what was on his mind, and it unnerved me. He was good at masking his feelings…or maybe he didn’t have many feelings to begin with.
Apparently around here, you never knew.
“You seem stressed,” Vaughn commented, his tattooed hands picking the pepperoni off his pizza piece by piece, bringing them to his mouth.
“I don’t like being kept in the dark,” I muttered. Letting out a sigh, I met his dark stare and added, “I feel like everyone is keeping things from me, and it’s bothering me.”
“I’m sure people had secrets where you came from, too.”
“Sure, but not secrets about past wives or shady businesses—” The latter caused Vaughn’s expression to change, and I froze, wondering if I’d said too much, lumped him and his family in with Ollie when I shouldn’t have.
Whoops. Sometimes I said things without thinking. A bad habit of mine.
Vaughn’s look was serious, and he leaned forward on the table, the intensity on his face making my insides coil tightly. “What shady business do you think my family is in, Jaz? Because I can guarantee it has nothing to do with you.”
“I just want the truth.” And it’s true—give me the truth about everything, and I’d be fine. I’d sit back and watch my last months as a high school senior pass me by. But hide things from me? Keep things from me? I was liable to bounce off the walls trying to figure out the truth, and I meant the truth about everything and everyone. I didn’t like playing games.
“Sometimes the truth is better off hidden,” Vaughn muttered, frowning slightly. “Sometimes when you find out the truth, you realize you would’ve been better off just leaving it be.” Trying to get me to drop it, probably.
I met his frown with one of my own. “So if I were to hire a private investigator and have him look into your family, what would happen?” Obviously I wasn’t going to get any info from Vaughn. He’d been not-so-forthcoming once he realized he had shit to hide, too.
Could I take anyone in this town at face-value?
“Don’t,” Vaughn warned. “My family doesn’t take kindly to people sticking their nose where it doesn’t belong.”
“Then tell me what you and your brother were talking about with Oliver,” I started.
He shook his head, his black hair swaying slightly. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I just can’t.”
I wanted to get up and walk away, but then I’d have nowhere to go. Vaughn needed to know I was serious, but he held all the cards right now, not me. I wouldn’t hold a single card until I knew the truth.
“If you go digging up graves,” Vaughn spoke quietly, his voice a deadly kind of intense, “you’ll find nothing but skeletons, and you’ll only anger the people who put those skeletons in the ground in the first place.”
Words that were probably wise and rooted in truth, but still I couldn’t let it be. My gut told me something was going on around here, and I had to figure it out. I had to find out the truth, otherwise…otherwise what? What if this was all me trying to prove to my mom that we shouldn’t be here? What if this was me being a rambunctious kid, seeking to prove I was right and my mom was wrong?
I didn’t want to be like that, but I also couldn’t just sit idly by.