"You still are."
As slowly as he'd moved when he'd grabbed my hands, he lifted the back of my hand to his mouth just as slowly. I still didn't take the chance to pull away, and he brushed his lips along my knuckles, sighing with obvious relief. Was it possible the gift that made him sexual catnip to me went both ways? That would be a new development.
The longer we held hands, the more I wished we could sneak away and back to Lawrence and pretend this all hadn't happened. But, as much as that was what I wanted, I knew I would never be able to. "Does the version of you that you are here in this home want me to be here still?" The question hurt my head, and I was pretty sure I'd asked in the most confusing way possible, but I was trying to be sensitive to his needs.
"I don't care." Aver shook his head. "I can't be anyone else but who I am when I'm with you. If you still want to go out there and stay to chat, I'll go with you, but as me. It will be strange, but more for me and my cousins."
I worried I was pushing him into something he wasn't ready for, but he sounded so confident of his decision. Then again, Aver always did. Before he'd barged in and gone bananas, I had been having fun talking with the guys. "Okay. I wouldn't mind talking more."
Aver smiled, flashing me his perfect white teeth.
If he wasn't ashamed of me, and we didn't have to hide who or what we were in this house, then the majority of my concerns with the situation had been alleviated. Moving forward, my focus could be on supporting him as he needed.
Except I wouldn't be able to do that for very long since this was a vacation.
Aver grabbed my hand and led me out, squeezing my fingers the moment before we walked back into the kitchen where everyone waited. I understood the reassuring squeeze better. They were an intimidating group to stand in front of, scattered throughout the kitchen. And they'd begun replicating. Either that, or Nash's twin had returned.
Aver stood a little bit ahead, letting me stand a little bit behind. "By some random chain of events, you all already know each other, but, everyone, this is Hollister."
Kansas waved while he munched on a baby carrot. His husband, Wyatt, stood beside him, holding who I assumed was their baby. Branson and Riley stood behind the kitchen island with Bran sitting, assisted by his father, on the countertop. Phin sat at the table with Nash standing behind him, both holding a baby. These guys sure did have a lot of kids. Since none of the fathers could stop gushing about their children for very long, I felt like I already knew them all too—Bran, Madison, Patrick, and Calvin. I'd liked being near so much pure joy. I might have snuck a touch on Phin's watchband, after they'd invited me back to their house, and the only thing I'd felt was happiness.
"The kids just got up," Phin said as he wrestled the child trying to wiggle out of his arms. "But, after diapers, we're going to have dinner…" He made a face. "I should've phrased that differently."
I laughed. "Diaper dinner, huh? On second thought…"
Phin's eyes widened, and he shook his hand at me. "No, no, don't let me scare you. It's food. Real food. That we…will eat." He looked over at his husband like he wished Nash would put him out of his misery.
Dinner sounded fun, but Aver had specified a chat. Was that because that was all he was ready for, or because it was the first thing that came to mind? I tugged on his hand, and when he looked over at me, I whispered, "Is that okay? Can we stay?"
Aver smiled and kissed our joined hands. "Of course, pet."
For a reason I didn't want to look at too closely at the moment, I loved that he'd called me that pet name in front of the others. So far, the name had only been spoken between us two.
We turned back to the group together. Every eye was on Aver, and each of them looked shocked. "Hollister will be joining us for dinner," Aver announced.
"I'd say so," Riley murmured, fanning his face. His husband, Branson, grabbed the waving hand and kissed it.
Nash stood forward, holding one of their children on his hip, and with his other hand in Phin's back pocket, he guided his family forward. "I'm not sure what's going on here, but I am a fan."
"But not a super fan," Aver whispered in my ear, and my cheeks went red.
I glared at him, but he just smiled proudly while we both pictured the same moment from the night before.
"Clearly, you're good for this one." Nash jerked his forehead toward Aver. "He's returned a new wolf."
Aver stiffened while I frowned. That was a weird word choice. Aver was like a lone wolf, but then, living with three relatives and their families didn't exactly paint the picture of a lone wolf. "What do you mean? What sort of wolf was he before?"
Aver's lips arched down as his eyebrows dipped with worry.
The sudden mood swing didn't make sense, but the tension still thickened in the room. I hadn't needed to touch anything to see that; it was obvious. It felt very much liked I'd somehow stepped into another field of landmines, but I didn't understand why.
Suddenly, no one seemed to know what to say. But I didn't want an explanation from anyone—I wanted it from Aver. At least he wasn't avoiding my gaze like some of the others. "What is he talking about?"
Before he could reply, Kansas butted in. "We definitely don't all turn into wolves."
Aver sighed.
"Smooth, baby," Wyatt said with one hand reassuringly squeezing Kansas's shoulder.
If this was their version of a prank, it lacked the believability factor. Were they honestly trying to convince me Aver turned into a wolf? That they all did? I looked back at Aver. He held my gaze, but the tightness in his eyes hadn't been there a few minutes ago. So he was in on this too?
I laughed, but it sounded airy and high-pitched. "You're all shi—shooting with me right now, right? Is this an initiation thing? Aver?" I was still waiting for his reply and was positive he'd say something to make the whole situation make more sense.
"It wasn't something that came up, pet. And it wouldn't have changed anything about how I felt about you."
Was the implication that he was worried how it would've changed how I felt? And what exactly were we talking about? I'd partied with a wide variety of people—general kinksters, vanilla couples, furries, adult babies, and so many more—but this didn't feel like that. It didn't feel like they were explaining a kinky lifestyle where they all acted like wolves. "Okay, I'm getting scared. What didn't come up?"
"Aver, I can't believe you wouldn't—" Branson started to say.
Aver snarled over my head at him. "Really? Because you were so forthcoming. Riley had to force the truth out of you."
"Accidentally!" Riley chirped.
The bickering felt familiar, an argument between two people with a lot of history. But what they were arguing about was impossible. Right?
"It wasn't something I purposefully hid from you, Hollister. But, like my sexuality, this is a secret that only few know, and it must stay that way."
I pulled my hand free, and that time, he let me. "How many more secrets do you have, Aver?"
"This is the last one, but—" He grimaced. "It's layered."