“There was this kid called Mo. He was around the same age as me, maybe two months younger.” He shrugged. “He’d been placed the week before me, and he didn’t talk much. Caffrey asked if he could juggle and threw him two cans of beer. He dropped them obviously. Too big, too heavy. Slippery. Caffrey went nuts. Said he needed the proper motivation. Made him stand in the corner with his arms out holding them. Except it went on for hours, and Mo was crying and kept dropping them. Caffrey thought it was funny.”
Daniel had no idea what to say, but he would make sure they got this bastard if it was the last thing he did.
“There were two other boys, but they just used to stay away from me and Mo. Had their own room. Did everything they were told. Caffrey kept interrupting Callum, who was trying to sing, and shouting at Mo. His arms must have been killing him, but every time he dropped them, Caffrey made him pick them up again. When he kept crying, Caffrey sent him upstairs.”
I said I didn’t know how to do anything, and he said it was okay, and could I read for him? I was so relieved. I read this book I can’t even remember, but I’d seen what he was like with Mo, so I was scared and my voice shook. He used to have these cheap carton juice drinks. The sort you pushed a straw through the seal?”
“Yeah,” Daniel acknowledged quietly.
“He’d already brought one in for us each, and he passed me one.”
“Open?”
Eli nodded. “I didn’t get it at first. I didn’t get why my words started slurring, or why I was dizzy. He said I looked too warm and gave me another. Said I might be cooler if I took my T-shirt off.”
Daniel sat, hardly daring to move. He wasn’t sure if he was even breathing.
“I don’t remember anything else, but when I woke up I was in my own bed, and I was sore.”
Daniel swallowed his nausea down. “Did it happen again?”
Eli nodded. “He’d stopped pretending by then. Caffrey used to hold me down, and Callum covered my nose while Mark poured the crap down my mouth. It looked like water, but it tasted tangy. Metallic.”
“The other boys?”
Eli nodded. “You know what you said about kids being so beat down, even if they could, they wouldn’t try and get away?” Daniel nodded fatalistically. “He didn’t need to do it after a while. He just did it because he thought it was funny. Callum was drinking.”
“How old was he?”
“About twelve at a guess. I think he’d been there for a long time.”
Eli had been coming into the kitchen to wash his hands just to see Callum chug two huge gulps of vodka out of the bottle. Callum swallowed and wiped his mouth with his arm. He swayed a little, then grinned. “You get a night off tonight.”
Eli stared, too frightened to respond. Callum did exactly what Caffrey wanted. He’d even heard Mo tell Eli he was going to run away.
“We can go,” Mo whispered. “When they’ve been drinking beer.”
Eli shook his head. He’d seen the condition Mark had been in after punishment when Caffrey had caught him sneaking out.
The next morning Cruz had dragged him and Mo to see Caffrey. And Callum was there, and he knew Callum had told Caffrey Mo was going to run. Caffrey had a crop he used if he was really angry and felt his fists weren’t good enough. Mo had started struggling and crying as soon as he saw it. Eli had just been numb. Caffrey was yelling. Promising he would whip Mo so hard it would make him bleed. He had pinned Mo down over his knee and practically ripped his ragged jeans down, raising his arm.
“It was me.”
Caffrey had faltered for a second in shock at Eli’s admission. Eli never protested. Eli never cried. Eli did what he was told when he was told to do it.
And Eli had thought he was going to die, and a very large part of him—too big a part—hadn’t cared. Then Caffrey had locked him in one of the trailers without cleaning it out. Two days he’d been in there. Eli had been beside himself in terror. When Eli had been let out, he didn’t talk to Mo anymore. He didn’t have anything to say.
And Eli was so ashamed because it hadn’t been Mo’s fault, but afterward he treated him like it had been. “I never understood at first why no one seemed to care. I thought for a long time Ramsay—”
“The social worker?” Daniel asked.
Eli nodded. “I never believed Callum at first. I thought Ramsay would come and get me, but Callum promised if you ran you would just get brought back and locked in one of the containers.”
And that had been when Eli had known he couldn’t let himself be locked in there ever again. And eventually he took no holding down, no drugs. Because he had come to accept that it was his life.
Eli blinked as Daniel nudged the bottle of water at him. “I’m sorry.”
Daniel shook his head. “You have absolutely nothing to apologize for.”
Eli met Daniel’s eyes and took the water. “I can’t believe I told you that.” Then he flushed because he hadn’t meant to say it out loud.
“You can tell me anything,” Daniel promised. Eli gazed at him. Could he? Did he dare?
“How much did you see of the brother?”
“Not as much. I think he was as scared of Caffrey as we were.” He’d watched though. “The chicken’s cold.” Daniel had stopped eating as soon as Eli had started talking.
Daniel regarded him steadily. “It doesn’t matter, unless you’re hungry.”
“Yes.” He wasn’t hungry at all, but if he didn’t eat he didn’t think Daniel would and that wasn’t fair.
Daniel smiled. “How about we veg out in front of the TV and just get snacks when we want?”
That didn’t sound bad actually, and Daniel wasn’t acting all weird because Eli had told him stuff. Things he’d never told anyone.
Eli turned and went into the kitchen. “Do you want something now?”
He looked up and took an immediate step backward, stumbling slightly, as Daniel had followed him silently and he hadn’t known. Daniel reached out quickly, grabbing his arm to steady him.
A little girl laughing. Blond hair. Cherries. Cherries? But they were sweet, and her fingers were covered in them. Then she looked down at her hands, and it wasn’t juice.
The smell of the blood hit him from before, and he pushed at Daniel frantically. “Let go.”
Daniel’s hands dropped immediately, and he stood back. “Eli? What’s wrong?” Eli shook his head mutely and took another step back. Daniel winced like he’d been hit. “I won’t touch you.”
Eli took deep, clean breaths. The scent had faded. For a second he’d thought he was gonna hurl, but as soon as he let go it went.
“What did you see?”
Eli didn’t reply. He wasn’t sure where to start.
Daniel nodded as if he had answered and walked back out of the kitchen straight into his own room and perched on the bed. He didn’t try to close the door, just sat there with his head in his hands. Eli was torn between leaving him alone and going in.
“Who is she?” Eli’s feet had taken him to the door.
Daniel dropped his hands and met his gaze. “The reason I left. She was called Sarah.”