As if he hears me thinking of him, the jingle of keys followed by the door opening grabs my full attention. Ivan appears in the door, and I jump up from the mattress, running for the door. He carries me to his place as he always does and deposits me on the couch, closing and locking the door behind us. “I need to take a look at your hand, Kitten, since I didn’t get to this morning.”
Ivan’s gray eyes seem darker than normal tonight, and I wonder what happened today, how his meeting went?
“Okay.” I watch him get the first aid kit from the kitchen and my stomach growls, reminding me that I haven't really eaten.
“Do you have something I can eat? Turns out the bologna sandwiches aren’t that good.”
He grins at me. “Sure, I don’t have a lot here. We have a small canteen downstairs where I usually eat, but I’ll find you something when I’m done looking at your hand.” He sits down next to me and unwraps my hand, shaking his head. “I’m sorry... I should have asked you if you were hungry.”
“It’s okay, you already do so much for me. It’s not your job to ask me about things like when I last ate.”
His angelic features turn into a frown. “It will never be enough, Kitten, never…” He cleans my cut again and smears some ointment on it but doesn't rewrap my hand.
“Come on, let’s find you something to eat.”
He leads me to the kitchen and makes me sit down on a chair. I watch him search through the cabinets and peek in the refrigerator before gazing at me over his shoulder.
“How about some oatmeal with apples?”
“That sounds amazing.” I smile.
He makes me some oatmeal on the two-burner stovetop, and I can’t keep my eyes off of him. Watching him do this mundane task is oddly comforting. Especially knowing that he is doing it for me. It gives me a sense of false hope that maybe someday we could actually be together, we could do this somewhere else, somewhere safe.
A few minutes later, he sits a bowl of warm oatmeal topped with cut-up apples in front of me. I dive in, shoving steaming hot spoonfuls into my mouth. Each bite lands heavily in my belly. I catch him looking at me as I vigorously eat the delicious meal. I feel like a slob, and embarrassment starts to heat my cheeks.
“Sorry.” I try and eat a little slower, but he just smiles.
“Eat however you want, Kitten. You don’t have to hide the fact that you’re hungry.” He takes the seat across the table, and I decide to change the subject.
“How was your meeting?” I curiously ask while finishing up my oatmeal at a much slower, far less sloppy pace.
Ivan shrugs. “It was what it always is. A bunch of full-grown men discussing illegal shit.”
Irritation seems to drip from his words. He doesn't want to talk about it, and that’s fine, I guess. It’s not really my business anyway, and I don’t care to know what they’re doing next.
“I did want to talk to you about what’s going to happen during the transport to Vegas. To prepare you, get you ready, since we’re going to be leaving next week.”
“Okay, what’s going to happen?” I try to keep the fear out of my voice. All this time, I’ve had Ivan. With the auction fast approaching, I’m not sure how often I’ll be coming up here, if at all, or spending time with him.
“I know you’re worried and probably scared, but you need to make sure you do every single thing instructed of you between now and when we go into hiding.”
I gulp, the oatmeal in my belly feeling like a ton of bricks. “You know I’ll do whatever I have to.” And I will. I want out of here. I want to escape this place so badly, I can almost taste the freedom on my tongue.
Ivan’s gray eyes pierce mine. “A couple of days before the auction, they’re going to come and get each of you. They’ll bring you into a containment area, make you strip and hose you down. You’ll be given a bar of soap and instructed to clean yourself.”
“I’ll get to see the other girls?” I ask, somewhat shocked. The entire time I’ve been here, I’ve not once seen another female, not that it’s all that surprising.
Ivan nods. “Yes, but do not talk to them. Do not talk at all. I will be there. I’ll be watching to make sure everything runs smoothly. If you or any of the other girls get out of line, they’re going to hurt you, or I may have to hurt you myself.”
My eyes go wide. “You would do that?” I don’t know why I ask the question, but I can’t truly fathom Ivan hurting someone who doesn’t deserve it.
His jaw flexes. “It’s not like I’d want to. It’s not my normal job, but with Yulie gone, it falls into my hands. If I don’t make sure the girls follow our orders, then they’ll know something is up, and I can’t risk any suspicions being raised this close to the auction. However, if you do as they tell you, then nothing bad will happen. I won’t hurt you, Violet.”
The worst thing of all is that I believe him, but that’s not to say the other women won’t get hurt or aren’t hurt now. A part of me hates myself for being spared while they all suffer.
“And what about everyone else?”
Ivan looks away, shame filling his features. “There is nothing I can do, Kitten. All that matters is that I protect you. I vowed to get you out of this, and I’m not going to fail you again.”
As much as I want to push him to help them, too, I understand he can’t. He’s already risked too much for me. If he risks any more, he might get caught, and if he gets caught, we’re both as good as dead.
“What else?” I ask, knowing there is more. There has to be.
“The day of the auction, they’ll give each of you a shot that will make you incoherent. You’ll be awake and able to respond to things being asked of you, but you’ll feel like you aren’t in control of your body or your emotions. You’re going to feel kind of numb. It is imperative that you don’t try and run, that you keep your blindfold in place, and that you don’t fight anyone, no matter what is asked of you. You will need to trust me completely because if you don’t, then this will not work.”
Worry coats my insides, but I nod.
“I will not let anyone hurt you, Violet.”
I lick my lips, the urge to kiss him consuming me. He’s protected me, guarded me in every sense, and he’s everything I could ever want, even if he doesn’t believe it.
“Can we talk about something else?” I don’t know if I can handle anymore tonight. The thought of all of that happening within a week has my stomach doing somersaults.
“Maybe we could stop talking altogether?” I try to give him a seductive grin. I have no idea what I'm doing, but Ivan seems to know exactly what I’m up to.
“Kitten… stop.” Ivan looks away to something behind me. “I’m not going to fuck you again.”
My shoulders sag as his rejection sinks in. “Why not? Didn’t you enjoy last night?”
He grins at me and shakes his head. “Silly little girl, you just have no fucking idea. You are sore, and I'm not going to hurt you. I only ever want you to feel pleasure with me.”
“I’m fine, I promise.” I make a little pouty face. “Please, I promise I’ll tell you if it starts to hurt.” I want to be with him. I need the physical connection, even if he refuses to give me anything emotional or admit there's more to us.