Ace had saved my ass.
Needing to restore a little of my dignity, I decided to get dressed. Ace’s second dresser drawer was full of T-shirts, so I helped myself to one. Mine smelled as if someone had spilled a beer down my front. They probably had. His shirt was loose on me because I didn’t have huge muscles. Who was I kidding, I didn’t have any muscles. Not bold, or weird, enough to borrow his underwear, I kept mine and dragged on my jeans that had been discarded on the floor.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to know how they’d gotten there. Picturing Ace dragging them off me was almost as embarrassing as the possibility I’d taken them off in front of him in some sort of drunken striptease.
No, the striptease would definitely be worse. I dragged the fabric up, wishing they weren’t so damn tight in the light of day, and spotted a basket of toiletries sitting on top of the dresser. Score. I dug through it until I found a bottle of mouth wash, then picked up the puke bucket and set out to find a bathroom.
The house was still quiet. Most of the guys were probably passed out, but not Ace. He’d run off somewhere, probably to exercise. He was such a chipper asshole in the morning. The bathroom was right across the hall, door open, so I slipped in and rinsed out the bucket. Then I pissed what felt like an ocean, gargled mouth wash, washed my face, and ran my wet hands through my matted hair.
Marginally better. I still looked like death warmed over.
Crossing the hall, I walked back into the bedroom just as Ace pulled a sweaty tank over his head, baring incredible abs and a solid chest.
His sudden presence startled a yelp out of me, which made him stumble in surprise and fall into the corner of the bed.
“Jesus,” I gasped. “I didn’t hear you come back.”
Ace managed to get the fabric over his head and toss his shirt on the floor. He was as bad as Dre. “Sorry, I went for a run. I thought you left.”
“The note said to wait, so…”
He nodded, crossing his arms over his chest as he looked me over. “You’re in better shape than I thought you’d be after last night,” he said. Then smirked. “Nice shirt.”
I plucked at the loose fabric of his shirt. “Clean anyway.”
Ace stared at me a minute. His gaze was intense, and I fidgeted, suddenly feeling awkward.
“Thanks for letting me crash here. Hope it wasn’t too much of a bother.”
“You’re never a bother.”
I huffed. “You had to give me a puke bucket. I was definitely a bother.”
“This is a frat house. We’re well supplied in puke buckets.”
I smiled, appreciating the effort, but I was definitely an idiot for drinking so much. I had very little experience with alcohol, never much of a partier in high school. Guess I was a lightweight.
“Should I go—”
“Close the door. I need to tell you something.”
We spoke over one another, and I stopped. “What is it?”
Ace swallowed, looking a little nervous. “Can you sit? This will take a few minutes…”
I took a seat beside him on the bed, trying to ignore the stretch of warm, bare skin and the faint scent of his sweat.
“Whatever I did, I’m sorry,” I said, fearing that the striptease I’d imagined might be the least of my worries. “If I said or did … anything … to you.”
His brow furrowed. “Did something? You could barely wal— Oh. Oh, no, no. You didn’t do anything like that. Not with me.”
I felt my face tense. “With Jonas?”
He hesitated, and I felt myself flush. Raising my hands to cover my face, I mumbled, “I’m never drinking again.”
“No, come on. Nothing happened with Jonas. Stop trying to guess what I’m going to say.”
“Then fucking say it,” I snapped. I was too hungover for this emotional roller coaster.
“Look, Jonas was going to take you back to his room. I … told him no. He said it was just to sleep, but I didn’t want to take any chances. Jonas isn’t who you think he is.”
I squinted, not sure what to make of that. I barely knew Jonas, so I didn’t think he was anything other than a cute frat boy who liked me.
“He’s not the guy giving you gifts,” Ace clarified. “He’s not your secret admirer.”
“How would you know that?” I asked. If Ace had talked to Jonas about this, I’d be mortified.
Ace swallowed, his eyes meeting mine. “Because I am.”
“You’re what?”
“I’m the one leaving you the gifts.”
My chest tightened, heart squeezing hard. All those little gestures that had boosted my ego and made me feel valued and appreciated. They’d all been my big brother’s friend, just trying to make me feel less alone or something. I felt pathetic.
Still, I seized on one last hope. “If you’re just saying that because you don’t think Jonas is good for me, you don’t need to worry. I don’t think we really clicked quite right…”
Jonas had been in his element last night, and while I’d managed to have fun with the aid of much drinking, he hadn’t shown much interest in actually getting to know me.
“No, it’s the truth.” Ace took a deep breath. “I’m your secret admirer.”
“So Jeremy put you up to it,” I said bitterly.
“No.”
“Then you felt sorry for me or something.”
Ace hesitated. “No.”
“You’re lying to me.” I stood, ready to walk out.
“I’m not.” Ace grasped my hand, fingers curling around mine. “I did it because I like you. I wanted to cheer you up, to make you happy, but I want those things because I care about you.”
Then, before I could fully process all that, he stood up, lifting a hand to my face. Leaning in, he said it again: “I like you, Benji.”
We were close enough to kiss, Ace’s breath brushing my lips like a lover’s, and it was all too much. I still couldn’t believe him even as my heart leapfrogged around in my chest. His eyes were intense, too much. Everything about him was suddenly overwhelming. His presence, his feelings—
No. He’d checked up on me for Jeremy, that was all. He’d felt sorry for me, so he’d bought me little anonymous gifts and suggested I had an admirer. He’d lied to me every time we talked about it. And now … this was just one more lie.
I stumbled back, shaking my head. My voice came out thready. “I should go.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not…” He cleared his throat. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I’m not hurt,” I lied. “I’m pissed.” That part was true. “You let me talk to you about this bullshit admirer, and all along you knew the truth. You must think I’m the biggest idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot.”
“Just pathetic, right?” I said bitterly. “Just Jeremy’s gay little brother who needs protecting.”
“You did need protecting last night!”
“Only because you lied to me!”
I would have never flirted with Jonas, never asked him out if I’d known my secret admirer was really just Ace. Secret admirer? Ha! More like Secret Pitier.