His big hand caught it before it could close completely, and he stepped inside with me, then shut us in together and threw the lock.
Crap.
Chapter Six
Jesse
The lock clicking into place was loud in the small room.
I turned, looking down at a scowling Lila. “Now, Bambi…”
“Nope. No. Let me out. We have nothing to talk about.”
I dragged my hand over my head and down my beard. “Yeah, we do.”
“Well, I don’t want to talk to you.” She tried to take a step back, but there was nowhere to go.
Everly banged on the bathroom door. “You okay, Lila?”
“I’m fine. I’ll be right out,” Lila said, glaring at me.
The banging stopped.
“We’ll be right out here if you need us,” Eves said.
I wanted to yell fuck off, badly, but being a dick to Dane’s girl, or any of Lila’s friends, would be a dumb move. Plus, I liked them, all of them. Unfortunately, right now they were getting in the way of me talking to my girl and it was pissing me off.
She’s not your girl.
Everly’s words from outside echoed through my head. “I hurt you when I left.”
She lifted her chin and shoved her glasses up her nose. That simple, familiar gesture made me want to kiss her even more. The fact that she was in only her bra with her tight ass-hugging jeans wasn’t helping.
“You didn’t. I’m fine. You did me a favor.”
She was lying. “For fuck’s sake, can we talk about this?”
She threw her hands up, making her tits—wrapped in only a scrap of purple lace—jiggle. It was distracting as hell. “What’s the point, Jesse?”
It took every bit of my self-control not to touch her. Watching her dance around the bonfire, her sexy, curvy, little body moving, bouncing, jiggling, had nearly killed me. Could you die from a hard-on? I was starting to think you could.
She crossed her arms, which only lifted her soft, full tits higher. My mouth watered at the sight of all that smooth, creamy flesh. The outline of her nipples was clear through her bra, and I wanted to bend forward and shove my face against those gorgeous soft mounds and stay there for the rest of my life.
“Stop it,” she hissed.
I glanced up at her. “What?”
“Looking at me like that.” She colored, turning a pretty shade of pink that crept down her neck.
“You’re standing there in a bra, Bambi, where the fuck else am I going to look?”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re so full of it. You certainly didn’t have trouble resisting my boobs the last time you saw them.”
I didn’t like remembering that night, what little I could remember of it, which wasn’t much. “I was wasted.”
She smiled, and there was no joy, no humor in it. “That’s right, you thought I was someone else.”
“I apologized for that.”
“Oh well, that’s okay, then.”
I growled under my breath. She had me in fucking knots. No one got to me like she did. Hell, no one talked to me like she did. No one would dare. Lila could do whatever the hell she liked. I was putty in her pretty hands. “Look, this morning, I was a prick. I don’t know why. I just…I hadn’t expected to see you.”
“That makes absolutely no sense,” she said.
She was right, but I wasn’t going to tell her I was jealous, that after seeing her with Brooks I’d barely thought of anything else. “No, we aren’t together, but you cut me off, babe. Like I didn’t fucking exist.” Something else that fucking stung. “I didn’t like it,” I added, telling her the truth.
“You didn’t like it?” she whispered.
I knew I’d said something wrong because her eyes went kind of wild.
She pointed at me. “I refused to let you use me as an emotional…fluffer, and you didn’t like it? So you thought the correct response to that was to insult me? To try to make me feel small and pathetic, like we were in the freaking schoolyard?”
Emotional fluffer? What the fuck? “No, hang on, Bambi…”
“No, Jesse. Just, no. None of what you’re saying is okay. You’re right about one thing, though, I don’t just jump into bed with anyone. Yes, I asked you to take things slow with me when we first met, but that was because you’re kind of intimidating. Being with you was…overwhelming. But I’m not some goddamned prude. I’m as sexual as the next person. And you’ve made it crystal clear I’m not your type, that the big bad biker can do a whole lot better. You don’t need to say any more. And you sure as hell don’t need to throw it back in my face, okay?”
“What the fuck, Lila? And what the hell do you mean, I can do better?”
She said nothing, just stared up at me with big, hurt, angry eyes.
I grabbed her waist, the side of her slender throat, pulling her closer, brushing my thumb over her smooth skin. I needed to get across to her that she was wrong. And fuck it, I wanted to touch her as well. “You think I didn’t want you? Christ, you have no idea. None. Fuck, Lila, I still want you, I…”
“Bullshit.” She shoved at my chest. “Don’t you dare… Don’t play with me, you selfish son of a bitch.”
I stared down at her stunned. “I’m not doing that, I would never…”
“I know exactly what you’re doing.”
She had me fucking stuttering, brain scrambled. I bested everyone I fought in the ring. My club brothers, our enemies, they didn’t mess with me. Some were openly afraid of me. And here was Lila, raining her anger down on me, putting me in my place and not giving one shit.
She shoved again, and I stepped back, speechless. Definitely a first for me.
“I don’t trust easy.” Her eyes locked on mine. “But I trusted you, Jesse. For some stupid reason, I trusted you, and you threw it back in my face. I can’t…” She backed away. “I can’t do this with you. Just, I need you to leave me alone.”
Then she slammed the lock back and rushed out, leaving me standing there like an asshole. Eves stood there watching me, the others had gone after Lila.
“Your girl handed me my ass,” I said to Everly. “Happy?”
She shook her head, then she stormed off as well.
I paced Dane’s old apartment above Rocktown Ink.
It was late, dark, cold outside, but I always ran hot. I yanked my shirt off and tossed it aside. Didn’t help that I couldn’t get Lila out of my head. Or what she’d said to me in that bathroom three nights ago.
Emotional fluffer? What even was that?
I gave in, pulled my phone out of my back pocket, and googled it.
Emotional fluffer: Friends with emotional benefits. A boyfriend or girlfriend without the rewards. Generally, a guy/girl friend is used for the emotional benefit in the relationship, while the physical benefit is being taken care of by another guy/girl.
What the fuck?
Why would she think that? Is that what I’d been doing? I definitely hadn’t been getting physical benefits from anyone else. I dragged my hand over my hair and growled. No, she was wrong. I liked talking to her. I’d missed her. That’s all. I wasn’t using her.