But I have hidden things from Indie about herself.
And tonight I will pull back the cloak she’s been wearing and set her free.
McKay is initially resistant. He doesn’t speak when I present my offer, but I know him well enough to hear what he’s not saying.
If McKay had his way, he’d never let Indie know the truth. If he had his way, he’d keep her ten forever. I know it. I can see it in his eyes.
He didn’t want to do what we did on Indie’s twentieth birthday. He was the one who walked out. Not me. Not Adam. Him.
But he didn’t get far. There is no way McKay would walk away from Indie. Not ever. Even if Adam hadn’t chased him out the door after Indie made it clear what she wanted from us that day, he would not have left. He might’ve gotten in his truck. Maybe even started the engine. But he would not have left.
But things have changed now. Indie was the one who left and McKay had no say in it. He will do anything to keep her now.
Anything.
So when I make my offer and he’s silently resistant, I know that from McKay, that’s implied agreement.
SESSION #191
INTERVIEW WITH INDIE - AGE 24
SESSION #191
DONOVAN: OK, Indie. You know the drill. Tell me what we’re doing.
INDIE: Oh, for fuck’s sake, Donovan. We all know what we’re doing.
MCKAY: We need to hear it from you, Indie.
McKay, you’re not supposed to say anything. Indie, say it out loud or we can’t get started.
Fine. We’re doing hypnosis so you guys can help me remember what I’ve been doing and where I’ve been for the past four years.
OK. Tell me the last thing you remember from your twentieth—
I… I just don’t think this is a good idea.
McKay, you are to keep quiet. Or you will have to leave.
I just—
It’s fine, McKay. I need to know this stuff. It’s time. I can’t go on like this. And I know why Adam isn’t here.
Why do you think he’s not here, Indie?
Because he’s afraid of me.
Is that the only reason?
You guys—
McKay! Shut up! … Go on, Indie. Are there any other reasons why Adam would not want to see you right now?
I mean… I’m sure he’s maybe… upset with me.
Why would he be upset?
Because I disappointed him.
Can you think of any specifics? What exactly did you do that disappointed him?
I dunno. But he’s like that. He’s not like you, McKay. You never walk out. Adam does. And so do you, Donovan.
OK, we’re getting off track here. So let’s focus on the main reason we’re doing this. I’m going to hypnotize you now, Indie. And then I’m gonna ask careful questions. If at any time I feel like you should not continue, I will pull you out of it. I will take care of you, do you understand?
And I’m here too.
McKay, if I have to tell you one more time—
I’m just saying. She knows I won’t let anything harm her. No matter what she finds inside her head.
Fine. Do you understand, Indie?
Yes. I do. And thank you, McKay.
You’re welcome, Indie.
OK, try to relax now. Let your whole body go heavy… let your mind become dark and blank. Take deep breaths with me. In and out. Slowly. Yes. And I’m going to count backwards from ten.
….
Ten. You are in the swamp, Indie. You are ten years old. Muddy, and tired, and hungry. But you’re happy because Nathan St. James is cooking you fish on the beach.
…
Nine. You are eleven years old, Indie. You are out in the back learning to defend yourself with McKay. He is hard on you, but you don’t mind. Because he’s gonna make sure you’re a tough little girl who can handle herself.
…
Eight. You are twelve and on a job with Adam. Something goes wrong. But that’s OK. Because Adam is there to protect you. You come home and you are just fine.
…
Seven. You are thirteen and you’re getting better at this. You can fight now. And every once in a while, you can pull one over on McKay and take him down.
….
Six. You are fourteen and you just got home from a very dangerous job. You could’ve died if you made a wrong move. But you didn’t make a wrong move. You did everything right.
…
Five. You are fifteen and the Company has fallen. But they didn’t get you. You were with us.
…
Four. You are sixteen. You and Nathan are closer now. More than just friends. He holds your hand in the woods and you like that. He makes you feel special. All your jobs are much easier now. You do them well and you make your own money.
…
Three. You are seventeen. Your jobs take you far away sometimes. And you might even leave for weeks or months. But you always succeed and when you get home, we are always here for you. You bought yourself a truck and have more freedom because we trust you.
…
Two. You are eighteen. Maggie is born. The birth was hard for you. It took fourteen hours but when it was over, you forgot all the bad things and only thought about the good. You are very happy, even though Nathan went away to college, because you still have us.
…
One. You are nineteen and Maggie is one. You are happy and so is your daughter. Adam can’t put her down and McKay is constantly shopping for educational toys on the internet.
…
OK. Indie. We’re here. Your twentieth birthday. You were keeping some secrets that day. Secrets about Nathan. Do you remember who Nathan is?
Why are we here again?
You know why we’re here, Indie.
No. But why this birthday? I don’t want to—
Indie. This is where all your problems started. We have to go back and see it more clearly. So you can deal with it and—
No, it’s not. They didn’t start here. They started back when I was fifteen. When Angelica left me.
…
Uh… I know I’m not supposed to say anything, but—
It’s OK now. She’s under. But be quick.
Is this going the way you thought?
Not exactly.
I know we just started, but what the hell happened at fifteen that we missed?
Let’s just keep going, McKay. This might be important. Indie, can you still hear me?