Mom patted my knee. “What’s got you most excited about being home?”
Sadie.
Her name popped into my head with Parker’s following right behind. I wanted to be with them more than I wanted to breathe. I couldn’t tell my mom that though. She had a reputation for matchmaking, and I wasn’t about to hand her an opportunity. “The quiet life. I want to grill some burgers, throw a football, and lie low—just enjoy being able to go to work and live life without feeling jumpy.”
“So the therapy helped?”
I nodded. “To a point. I have a long way to go before…” I almost said before I was whole enough to ask Sadie to consider me an option. I couldn’t ask her to marry a struggling man—that wasn’t fair to her. With time and work, I would get there, though.
I just hoped she’d wait for me.
Sadie
I hovered near the window that looked out over the driveway. For the hundredth time in the last ten minutes, I pulled the curtain aside and leaned to look down the street.
“Oh my gosh, come sit down. You’ll be able to hear when they pull up.” Lilly dropped a blue seven on the stack of cards, and Parker moaned. He started picking up cards until he grabbed a blue three, which he promptly played.
“I can’t sit.” I wrung my hands as I paced. “I’m just so excited.”
“Me too.” Parker squirmed in his seat. “I’m going to play football all day with Mason.”
I grinned at my little guy. We’d had a talk about things—sort of. I’d told him that I wanted to be closer friends with Mason, do more things together, spend more time with him. And I asked how Parker felt about that. He was over the moon. What kid wouldn’t be thrilled to have their own superhero football coach?
The table was set for three. Lasagna and garlic bread were warming in the oven. Mrs. McKnight told me about the ceremony and picking Mason up from the camp. I’d offered to make dinner for all of us, but she begged off while encouraging me to make a big deal about Mason coming home.
I pushed the curtain aside again, catching sight of Mrs. McKnight’s car. “They’re here.” Now that the moment had finally arrived, my feet stuck to the carpet and wouldn't move. Parker had the opposite problem, his shoes moved faster than his brain and he stumbled out the door.
I threw a panicked look at Lilly. She laughed. “If he’s going to be a part of your life, he’ll need to get used to having a kid around.”
I hesitantly made my way to the open door and stepped out onto the small landing. Mason had left without saying much. All my insecurities surfaced like an ugly monster holding me back. What if he’d decided that he could be with me but didn’t want to? What if he didn’t think we should be together?
I’d have to leave the state. My heart would not get over that.
Parker was at the car, yanking on the handle to get it open. I couldn’t see Mason because of the angle. When the door opened, Parker launched himself inside. One large, beautiful arm wrapped around my boy and held him close. A moment later, Parker laughed.
And then I heard a sound that filled the cracks in my troubled heart. Mason laughed. I closed my eyes and let the relief and joy and just plain happiness wash through me because of that sound. I’d never tire of hearing it.
Mrs. McKnight got out and waved at me. I gave her a small wave in return. I should go down there and talk to him, but I was chicken. In this moment, I had hope for us. If I went down there, he might squish it. Or he could take me in his arms, and we’d ride off into the sunset on his motorcycle. But staying right here? I still had both options.
She glanced over the top of the car to where Mason and Parker were chatting away.
“Parker?” she called.
They turned to her. “I need an ice cream sundae. How about you?”
His face got even brighter. “Yeah!”
“But dinner…” I glanced up at my apartment.
Mason’s head whipped up, and he saw me for the first time. His brown eyes warmed as they met mine, and he smiled shyly. My heart lurched toward him with that smile. He had no reason to be hesitant around me—but I hadn’t exactly had a chance to tell him that yet.
Mrs. McKnight grinned. “I’ll make sure he gets something real, too. But you don’t want to waste such a wonderful meal. You should eat.” She motioned for Parker to get in the back seat. “Climb in, we’ll try that new Scoop Shoppe.”
Mason’s brow lowered. “Mom, I don’t—”
She shook her head at him. “You’re not invited. It’s been a long time since your dad and I took a boy for ice cream.”
Lilly scooted out the door behind me. “Mind if I tag along? I heard they have unlimited toppings in the soft-serve section.”
Mr. McKnight walked up from where he’d parked Mason’s truck in front of the house. He handed Mason the keys. “I guess we’re going for ice cream.” He winked. “Behave yourself, but not too much.”
Mason’s face turned red, and my body flushed with heat.
The McKnights were not subtle people. My best friend wasn’t much help either. She climbed into the back seat and blew me a kiss.
I rolled my eyes. They pulled out.
Getting to the bottom of the stairs seemed to take forever with Mason watching me the whole way. I kept my hand on the handrail for support.
He was even hotter than I remembered. And I had a pretty good memory.
There was a new sense of peace about him too. It was visible in the line of his shoulders and the softness of his stance.
I was both exhilarated and afraid of what was to come. Instead of avoiding it, I switched over to wanting to get it over with. If he was going to kick me out and tell me not to come back, I just wanted to know.
“You look good,” I said.
“Thanks.” He ran his hand through his hair and looked around for something to talk about besides the big elephant that was his time in counseling.
We stood there for a moment, as unsure as two teenagers on their first date. Which was ridiculous. We were adults. We’d known each other forever. I was not going to spend the whole night tiptoeing around.
I reached for his hand. He pulled it back as if I’d shocked him. Maybe I had. But I was tired of letting him go, so I hung on. I was suddenly feeling brave. He was going to know what I was offering. I’d make sure of it.
“Come on. I have dinner ready, and you could use a home-cooked meal.”
His shoulders lowered, his gaze focused on our hands, and then he smiled. “That sounds amazing.”
I pulled him up the stairs, keeping a tight grip on him. It felt good to hold his hand. To be able to touch him. There was fear deep inside that if I let go, he’d run. Far and fast.
Which wouldn’t help my end goal of being nestled in his arms. And with how brave I was feeling, I knew that might be a bit too much for him right now. I could hold off…at least until after dinner. I still wasn’t sure where his head was after this last week, and I could be setting myself up for a major fall.
Once inside, I got busy getting food out and setting it on the table. Mason filled our water cups, and we sat down across from each other. Neither of us spoke, but I had a big story to tell so I decided to break the ice.