Another step forward, putting him in my doorway, causing me to take another back. My heart pounded in my chest, my stomach doing the tightening thing, but I ignored it. This wasn’t the time to show him he was right to worry. That he was right in any sense at all. “Is this how it’s going to be every time I try to help out? Is it going to be a giant battle like this?”
“You weren’t helping out. You were being a dick. My boss took me off the schedule. Does that not compute? How do you think I put food in the fridge, keep power running through the walls? That is my only job. And now Tim is worried about me and probably won’t schedule me on any busy nights while I’m pregnant.”
“I told you I would take care of shit. I’ll take care of you. I’ll take care of the babies. You don’t have to worry or work hard anymore. If you’d just let me help!” He was yelling now.
The tightness got worse.
I had to close my eyes, take a deep breath to concentrate. He didn’t understand that I didn’t want his help. I didn’t want him taking care of me. No matter how badly I would love for something to work out with him, I couldn’t relent. I couldn’t tolerate anyone else taking care of me. That was my job and mine alone, exactly the way I wanted it.
When I opened my eyes, his glare was locked on my stomach where my hands had subconsciously gone, as if they could stave off the discomfort.
The silence stretched between us as he came closer, putting his hands over mine. His deep gray eyes met mine, and it was like he was an open book for me to read. He didn’t want to take control from me, he just wanted to take care of what was his. And truthfully, whatever was going on was scaring the hell out of me. But I couldn’t admit that, not even to myself. It had to be okay. The babies had to be okay. That was the only option.
“You three mean the world to me,” he murmured. My stomach fluttered, but I batted those butterflies away. “I’m not trying to steal your control, Kate. I just want to make sure you’re okay. That they’re okay. Without you having to work your ass off as if you were a single mom. Because as of yesterday, you’re no longer single. And I plan for us to keep it that way. Okay?”
Truth be told, underneath my hard-as-stone shell, I was terrified and lonely. So freaking lonely. I hadn’t had anyone care about me in that way ever in my life. And I didn’t know what to do with it. “I don’t know how to make a relationship work.” Honesty had to be the best route.
“Well, for starters, we should probably stop fighting about every damn little thing that comes up.” I chuckled as his hands moved to my hips. “Also, you could let me help, so you aren’t stressing the fuck out all the time. If you don’t have to work, you could just focus on school and keeping yourself and those babies healthy.”
“I like my work,” I grumbled, but my fight had fled me. The heat from his hands on my hips, that rich scent that was only his, messed with my mind. For just a second, I would have loved to not be pregnant and have control over my damn mood swings and hormones.
The smirk tugging at his kissable lips told me he knew exactly what he was doing. “I love that you like your work. But it’s okay to take a break from it for a bit until you don’t have to worry about growing other people.”
He was right. I knew he was. But that didn’t mean he could be a dick about it at my job. Though maybe he knew that was the only way to get to me, so we could have it out like this. He was a manipulative genius.
“Fine,” I gave in, my shoulders slumping. “But this doesn’t mean I like you paying for my stuff or anything.”
That earned me a dark, rumbly chuckle. “Believe me, I would never assume as much.” He dropped his hands, taking a step back before running them through his hair. “You should get some sleep. It’s been a long day.”
I snorted. “You’re telling me.”
His eyes danced with humor before he said goodnight and went to leave my room.
“Would you sleep in here tonight?” I blurted, causing him to spin around and stare with his mouth hanging open. I cracked my knuckles, glancing around the room. “Not to do anything. Just… I thought it might be nice. To sleep together. You know?”
“Yeah. That would be nice.” His voice cracked as his hands fisted at his sides.
When we climbed in my bed that wasn’t big at all, I wondered if he’d ever just slept in a bed with anyone. I hadn’t. And when he wrapped his arms around my belly and took a deep breath, I about melted from pure exhaustion.
“Will you tell me who Del is?” he whispered into the dark, making my heart jump up my throat.
He’d heard part of my conversation. Which didn’t really matter. Just her name wouldn’t cause any hubbub.
I waved my hand in the air, too tired to explain anything. “Maybe another time.”
“M’kay,” he breathed before his lips brushed against my hair, making me tingle all over.
I was out within seconds.
11
Kai
The next morning, waking up with her in my arms, was a kind of bliss I’d never felt with anyone. I’d never just slept with someone before. It was a closeness I appreciated with her, since I had the feeling it was a first for her, too. Especially since she didn’t freak out at the fact that we’d slept in the same bed together. She even let me make her breakfast again without making much of a fuss. Relenting small bits of her control for at least a day, it seemed.
I had high hopes all our relationship fights would be secluded to that one day. The night before had been pure hell. Watching her work her ass off, knowing she was in pain, was torture. And then she argued with me when I told her to take it easy. We’d argued enough for an entire lifetime in one day.
Once we were ready for the day, she let me take her to her one class, giving me a kiss that set me on fire before getting out of the car.
I went over to Ava’s to hang for a bit. They lived in an older apartment building on the opposite side of The District. She buzzed me in when I called up.
When I arrived at their apartment on the fifth floor, she answered the door in her running clothes with a giant smile. “Kai!” she exclaimed, making me smile.
Getting to spend any amount of time with my sister before heading over to Ohio was a huge perk. My whole family was still a bit sore about me reenlisting, though I would never tell Kate as much. I was glad I was close to Ava for a while but bummed I couldn’t spend as much time with the rest of my family. There would be time yet. I was in the States again. That was what mattered.
“Hey, Av.”
She opened the door farther to let me in. The old apartment was upgraded with stainless steel appliances in the kitchen, dark cabinets, and light gray wood floors throughout. The rest of the apartment was obviously furnished by a guy, with a cheap couch, old wooden tables that looked like they came from a yard sale, and a giant flat-screen TV hanging from the wall. There were small touches of Ava though, like the well-placed wall hangings, and a few tasteful photos.
She followed me while I walked around, stopping at one of the photos of a road with colorful fall trees lining it.
“Mom’s?” I pointed at it.
“Yeah.” She nodded. “She gave it to me for my birthday. I sure miss the trees over there.”