‘Be careful with that pasta,’ I said while tapping on my stomach. ‘It’s deadly.’
‘Tell me about it.’
The waiter came with the bottle of wine, ready to pour it out.
‘Would you like to try it…?’ he asked.
‘Yes,’ said Andrew.
‘Nah, it’s fine,’ I said at the same time. ‘Oh, come on. I am sure it will be fine.’
The waiter proceeded to pour out the wine. We both cheered and drank a few sips.
‘See? It is nice!’ I said.
‘I know it’s nice, I picked it! I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t spoiled or something.’
‘You know who’s being spoiled, right?’ I said, smiling. ‘So, not that I don’t appreciate a spontaneous lunch with my favourite flatmate, but was there something you wanted to tell me?’
Andrew’s eyes were avoiding contact with me and he kept going through the menu.
‘We have time, let’s just order something first,’ he commanded. ‘How are you feeling anyway? You’ve been poorly for some time now.’
‘Yeah, I don’t know, maybe I should just spend more time in bed.’
‘Sure, by yourself, though. Skank.’
‘Hey!’ I said while pointing a finger at him. He didn’t even know half of what I was doing. Skank was uncalled for!
‘I think I’ll just have a pizza. I’m starving.’
‘If you’re having one, I’ll have one too. Then we can both be fat bastards.’
He smiled at me, took another sip of wine and grabbed the waiter’s attention once again. We put our orders in, and I couldn’t wait to stuff my face.
‘How’s work, by the way?’ I asked, noticing his somewhat defeated look.
‘Right. Here’s the thing…’
Uh-oh.
‘…It is very possible I will get a huge promotion soon,’ he said without any enthusiasm whatsoever. ‘…I’ll know for sure by the end of the week.’
‘That’s amazing! So, we are celebrating? Why do you look that serious then?’
‘If I do get it, it means I’ll have to relocate for an extended time, probably a few years.’
I was confused. Why was I only hearing about it so late?
‘Relocate where?’ I asked, now worried about the outcome.
‘New York,’ he said.
Shit.
‘…nothing is set in stone yet,’ he added. ‘But it would mean I’d have to sell the flat.’
‘Fuck.’
‘I am so sorry. It’s happening all so quickly and I didn’t want to alarm you,’ he reassured me, while rubbing my hand on the table.
I wasn’t sure what to think. I was not expecting such shitty news.
‘I am obviously ecstatic for you. I am just a teeny tiny worried I’ll be sleeping rough very soon.’
‘Like I’d allow that,’ he said.
‘Do you think it’ll sell quickly?’
‘I want it to. The quicker I sort things out here, the quicker I can get settled over there. I am really sorry, Leo.’
‘No. Don’t be stupid. It’s a great, incredible thing that has happened to you. Do not spoil it thinking about your flatmate.’ I attempted a smile. ‘You should be very proud of yourself. I know I am.’
‘I will, of course, help you find a place and everything. I’ll be there for you.’
‘I know.’
‘You could also come with me. That’s a very viable option.’
Viable? Was there anthrax in the wine? How did one of my wiser friends start chatting such shit?
‘Oh, absolutely,’ I said, sarcastically.
‘I’m serious. You hate your job, you’re depressed all the time, and Jake is out of the picture. You could start anew in a pretty cool city.’
He wasn’t wrong.
‘So far, I have been counting my friends as a pretty big reason to stay in London, but you are all just moving on with your lives. Sara is about to get married, John is hardly around and I often wonder whether Dominic is just a coworker.’
What would I have in a few months’ time? An ex-husband who was trying everything in his power to hurt me and to get rid of me? Even my dog was better off.
Maybe it was a viable option.
Maybe I did need to think about it.
As soon as I left Andrew to go back to work, I headed to the nearest gay bar to get unbelievably steaming drunk in the fastest way possible. It was 3 p.m.
I had decided to go to a bar near Sara’s workplace, so she could come join me as soon as she finished with work, but luck was just not on my side. It was one of those days where no one was available to do anything. All of my friends were busy, and I was in no mood to see any gross man trying to get into my pants over dinner, while I was feeling down.
The bar was very stereotypically gay. Circular booths with leather seaters were all around the borders of the bar, with a few tables scattered around the middle. Screens were playing music videos by the world’s favourite divas. It was early afternoon, so there were only old men drinking by themselves, or sitting together, gossiping about the good ol’ times. I was sitting at one of the booths, right in front of the bar counter, so I could make quick eye contact with the shirtless guys serving drinks. Also, it was so that I didn’t have to face the old men. I wasn’t in the mood to entertain anybody, apart from my dumb sorrows.
Then I did something quite unlike me. I texted someone I didn’t know so well. I was already near Sara’s workplace, may as well ask him. He accepted, and only an hour later, Duncan came through the door to keep me company.
‘You are really ruining my resolution to quit drinking,’ he said while coming towards me.
‘I’m a bad guy. What you drinking? I’ll get it,’ I said, mimicking what most of my friends would say to me. Perhaps I was trying not to look like the poor loser all my friends saw me as.
‘I’ll drink what you’re drinking,’ he said, in what sounded a much thicker Scottish accent than I had heard him speak before.
‘Can we have two more of these?’ I asked the bartender, while pointing at my empty vodka and diet Coke.
Duncan sat in front of me. He was wearing a Vans t-shirt and his iconic blue denim jacket. His hair was fluffier than last time I had seen him.
‘I’m so glad you asked me to come. I have never been here,’ he said, enthusiastically. ‘It’s cool!’
‘Oh, it’s super cool.’ I laughed. ‘There are a few men behind you that are about to eat you up.’
‘I don’t mind that. I have a low self-esteem!’ His grin made me smile, slightly. ‘What’s going on with you? I’m glad you texted, but you’ve been waiting for over an hour.’
‘I’m fine; it’s just one of those days.’
‘Don’t I know. My boss is away and being an absolute fanny with everyone via e-mail.’
‘I hear he’s not the most pleasant to work with.’
‘Yeah, no. He has mood swings all the time. I thought he was hot the first time I saw him, and now I literally shit myself when he tells me off for whatever reason.’
One day I truly needed to investigate why Jake found Marc so compelling, considering that every single person who met him pretty much called him a cunt soon after. Then again, my friends were probably lying to make me feel better.