‘Pardon me?’ I said, flabbergasted. Not because I thought I had been caught by CCTV, but all they had to do really, was ask the security guys at the staff entrance. They would have said something. They could have checked stock numbers. So many possibilities. Katherine was such a fucking incompetent moron.
‘So, we’re happy to put all this behind us. I apologise for the misunderstanding and putting you through this process.’
‘I can get back to work?’
‘Yes, from tomorrow, or this afternoon, if you wish,’ she said. Weirdly smiling.
She couldn’t deal with the job without Dominic and me. That was the reason why they didn’t go through with dismissal. Cheeky cow. If we both had gone, then she wouldn’t have time to put on make-up at work or be on her phone for the majority of the day.
‘No.’
‘No what, Leo?’ she asked.
‘No, thanks.’
I stood up.
‘I have no intention of coming back to this job. So, thanks, but no thanks,’ I said, feeling serene.
‘Please sit down. Let’s discuss this.’
‘Katherine. I never liked you when I was your manager years ago, and I most definitely do not like you now that, for god knows what reason, you have managed to bag a promotion. I only tolerated this time because Dominic was there with me.’
Her face went red. I could tell she wanted to slap me or choke me. But she couldn’t do anything.
‘I am grateful for the opportunity, but I never want to step foot in this building ever again. Have a nice day.’
I left them both in the room and I never felt better. I was unemployed, but I felt so good. I wasn’t in a rush to find a new job, as I wouldn’t have to pay rent for some time. I walked back onto the shop floor to find Dominic, who was working his last few shifts before he’d also say goodbye to the hell hole.
‘Hi, sweetie!’ I said.
‘Hey, sweetie!’ He turned around. ‘How did it go?’
‘It went great. They had nothing on me.’
‘Yay!’ He hugged me and picked me up. ‘So, when do you start again?’
‘I quit.’
‘You did?’
‘Yeah, I hate this. So much. I don’t want to be stuck here without you. It would be fucking awful.’
‘What are you going to do with money? Or are you still…?’
‘No, I’m done with that. I’ll be okay. I just need to reflect on a few things.’
‘Fuck yeah, then! Let’s go celebrate!’ he said, removing his employee pass from his neck.
‘Don’t you still have a shift to work?’
‘Fuck this place. I’m going to Berlin. Who cares about what these bitches say about me?’
I smiled. It was another end of an era.
Another friend who’d go away.
It was bittersweet.
There was another thing I needed to do that day. I made my way to Balham wearing my stolen suit and my Venetian mask. I looked like an idiot.
I knocked at his door, but no answer.
My fucking luck. I knocked again. Nothing.
I didn’t want to text him, as I was counting on the surprise effect, but I guess sometimes things just don’t go your way. I turned around to leave and there he was.
‘Duncan!’ I exclaimed.
His expression was dull.
‘You nearly gave me a heart attack with that mask. What are you doing here, Leo?’
‘I must apologise.’
‘There’s no need,’ he said while going past me and towards his front door.
‘I do. I messed up.’
‘Fine, I’ll listen.’ He put his back onto his front door.
‘We are not going inside? I pictured this as more of an indoor thing.’
‘No. Talk,’ he said in the coldest of tones.
‘Okay, fine. Duncan, we met at a stupid time. I wasn’t being myself. I was doing things that I wasn’t too proud of and I just acted like an arsehole altogether. Worst of all, I ruined our first date.’
‘Go on.’
‘I was drinking loads, I wasn’t taking my medication, and I even did a few drugs. That’s very, very unlike me. I freaked out when you were attending to me. I didn’t deserve you. Not then.’
‘I didn’t care, Leo.’
‘I did. Because I really like you. I knew I could be better, but I just needed a little more time, and if you forgive me, I can show you that. I won’t take that for granted.’
‘I am very happy you feel better,’ he said while walking towards me. ‘But it really shouldn’t be this difficult. We had a great kiss, and for a while there, I really thought we could be something, but maybe it’s just not meant to be.’
I felt like a sword just disembowelled my insides. It wasn’t going the way I had envisioned in my stupid mind.
‘I know it’s been a while, but I came here because I really think there’s something between us. Something special? As cheesy as that sounds.’
‘It’s pretty cheesy. There’s so much stuff you need to sort out. You have the stuff with your ex, your job and your flat. You have your hands full. Don’t further complicate things with a romance that has been clearly doomed since the start.’
‘Just give me a chance, please.’
‘I’ll think about it, okay?’ he said, putting a hand on my shoulder.
He looked so different without his signature smile. His eyes were no longer kind nor smitten. He wasn’t looking at me the way he did before. I was damaged goods in front of his eyes. I had screwed up big time. I didn’t blame him. After all, I wouldn’t go for a coked up, drunk, psychotic prostitute-wannabe either.
‘Okay,’ I said. I was probably crying inside.
‘It’s not to say we can’t be friends, or we won’t see each other around. I just don’t think we can work.’
‘You’ve made your point.’ I was trying hard not to sound devastated. ‘I will see you around.’
‘Take care, Leo.’
‘That was it?’ Sara asked, while smoking a cigarette. ‘That doesn’t sound like Duncan at all.’
‘I broke him,’ I said while looking at the floor.
We were sitting on the balcony at Sara’s house. She was wearing Alfie’s puffer jacket. She looked like a navy Michelin man. Sara could not cope with the cold in the slightest.
‘Well, that’s shit. Bet you thought you’d get to your thirtieth with a spanking new boyfriend.’
I had completely forgotten. My birthday was that week. I stressed so much about it before.
‘Shit, I wasn’t even thinking about that.’
‘You know, maybe Duncan wasn’t right for you. Maybe you just thought he was because he was the only decent male you had around at the time you guys met. Maybe there’s someone better out there.’
‘Yeah, maybe. I just really liked him, you know?’
‘Yeah, I know. But it’s only one thing that has gone wrong. You have ended things with Jake officially, you don’t have HIV, or any other nasty disease, you are free from your god-awful job and you don’t have to pay rent! I think it’s an overall great time for you.’