Caden swallowed, saying nothing.
“He told me that I wouldn’t age like a normal human, that…I was only mostly human now,” I said, shifting so I wasn’t leaning too far to the side. “Is it true? Is that how you healed me? With the Summer Kiss?”
“It is.”
Even though I already knew it, it was still a shock to the system. Possibly because I’d totally forgotten about all of it. “Were you ever going to tell me? I mean, eventually, I would’ve figured out that something was up. Or what if I was injured and went to the doctor? They’d see—”
“They would have no way of knowing. Your blood work would not show anything abnormal. They do not have the technology to test for that,” he explained. I gaped at him. “Aric didn’t explain it to you completely. The Summer Kiss healed you, yes, but I had no way of knowing that it would have long-term effects on you. It doesn’t always, and I wouldn’t have known until you were injured again or—”
“When I stopped aging?” I suggested because I was helpful like that.
“You will age, Brighton, just at a much slower rate.”
“How much slower? Like I’ll have to leave before people start asking questions?”
“Yes,” he answered bluntly.
I opened my mouth and then closed it.
“You won’t live forever. Neither will I. But from what I know,”—he exhaled heavily—“for every fifty years, it will be a year for you. Give or take a few.”
“Oh, my God.”
Caden sat back. “I didn’t tell you because if Aric hadn’t done this, I wouldn’t have wanted you to worry unnecessarily. But once I knew for sure, I would’ve told you.”
Nodding dumbly, I admitted to myself that I believed him, but it was still a lot to process. Everything was a lot. Silence fell between us as I gathered my thoughts. There was more we needed to talk about, and right now wasn’t the time for me to freak out.
Apparently, I’d have a lot of time for that later.
“He told me about Siobhan and what…what he did to her,” I continued, heart thumping. “And how that started the Great War. It was why he put me—”
“In the dress,” Caden said, dragging his finger over his brow. “I know. It was her wedding dress. Or it was supposed to be. Aric took her on our wedding day.”
Empathy crowded out the anger and confusion, taking center stage in my chest. “I’m sorry. What he did… He was truly evil.”
Caden nodded. “It was a long time ago, Brighton.”
“That doesn’t make it easier to deal with.”
“No, you’re right. I knew what he did to her. He made sure I did. And the rage…it made me vulnerable to the Queen.”
I shifted carefully, letting my feet touch the floor. Like this, we were only inches apart. “I understand why you wanted to be the one to kill him.”
“It wasn’t just because of what he did to Siobhan. Don’t get me wrong. That was part of it, but it was also what he did to you and your mother. It’s what he’s done to countless others. His death was a long time coming.”
That was true.
I drew in a shallow breath. “He said I was your mortuus. That through me, he could’ve forced you to open the doorway and free the Queen. What does that mean?”
His gaze lifted to mine. He was quiet for so long that I didn’t think he’d respond. “You are my mortuus.”
The breath I took seemed to go nowhere.
“It means you are…you are my strength. My sun. You are my heart.”
My entire body jolted.
“You are also my greatest weakness,” he continued. “It is not an object or anything tangible. It is the source of my power and my weakness. Through you, complete and utter control of me is possible. That is what mortuus means. There was only one before you. That was Siobhan.”
I drew back, shaking my head. “I don’t understand. How is that possible? You…” I swallowed the lump that formed in my throat.
“I love you.”
Those three words were like a bomb.
And Caden wasn’t done. “I love you, and that is why you’re my mortuus. My everything.”
“You love me?” Happiness I didn’t know I could even experience rushed through me in a wave that left my skin tingling. Then it was squeezed too tightly by the grips of reality, turning my entire being numb. “How can you love me? You’re engaged—”
“Not anymore. I broke the engagement before I even knew you disappeared.”
“What?” Thunderstruck, I stared at him.
“When we were together, that wasn’t planned. You know that. I wouldn’t have set out to sleep with you while still marrying Tatiana, but I…I wanted you. I’ve wanted you from the first time I saw you. Before I even knew you. And I don’t know why. Our elders say—” He cut himself off. “That doesn’t matter. My duty is to take a Queen of my kind, but that isn’t right. It’s not what I want, and it would not be fair to Tatiana. To marry her when I love and want another.”
My heart was pounding so fast, I feared it would come out of my chest.
“I thought I could go through with it. That I could keep you away. I tried. The moment I became King, I tried, and I failed. Obviously.” His eyes closed. “I knew what you were to me. Not when I saved you after Aric’s attack that night years ago, but not too long after that. I watched you, watched you heal and then hunt. From afar, I saw you grow braver and stronger, and I admired you. I respected you. I…knew after I found you in that club, pretending to be someone else.”
Oh.
Oh, wow.
“But I also knew that if Aric or Neal or any of my enemies realized that you were my mortuus, you’d be at constant risk.” His gaze held mine. “I thought it was best to marry Tatiana and keep you safe.”
His words came back to me. You’re a distraction. A weakness that I will not allow to be exploited.
I’d thought he meant that I was nothing more than a distraction that could be exploited, not what he was saying.
“That’s all I was trying to do, but I couldn’t… I couldn’t go through with it, being with someone else and knowing that you’d eventually find another. I’m too selfish for that. I couldn’t do it. I broke the engagement and then went to you. You weren’t home, and you didn’t come home. That’s when Ivy reached out to say that no one had heard from you.”
“You…you told me that you needed a Queen of your kind and that what we did was a mistake. You said it was nothing. All of that was a lie?”
“It was,” he said quietly.
“Do you have any idea how much that hurt me? How much that sliced into me because I—” I cut myself off. “If it wouldn’t hurt me so much, I’d totally punch you in the throat right now.”
“I’d deserve it. I hurt you. I thought it was the lesser of two evils. I was wrong.”
“You were so wrong.” My hands curled into fists. “Because Aric figured out anyway. There was…” Something tugged at the fringes of my memory. “I don’t know… I don’t know what to say.”