“There’s nothing you need to say.” Caden leaned forward, his eyes snagging mine. “Not right now.”
But there was. Because, damn it, I was tired of lies. “I love you. I’m in love with you.”
A half-grin appeared. “I know.”
I blinked. “Excuse me?”
“I can sense it.” His grin turned to a smile that took a little of my breath away. “I could feel it.”
I snapped my mouth shut, blowing air through my nose. “But you hurt me, Caden. You hurt me twice now, and I’m just supposed to be okay with that? Take that risk again?”
Sadness crept into his gaze, and his smile faded. “I know. I don’t expect you to be okay with it. Not right now. But I plan to prove to you that there will be no risk. I will not take from you like I have. Never again will I hurt you.”
God, I wanted to believe that—so badly that it almost hurt. But I… “I don’t know what to think right now. About anything. I don’t even know what is going to happen to me.” Tears pricked my eyes. “If you had told me this before…before what happened with Aric, things might be different. I wouldn’t just be learning this.”
“I know,” he repeated. “All of this was what I needed to talk to you about, but I knew it wasn’t right. Not after everything. Some time needed to pass. You needed to heal. I had no idea that Aric told you any of this.”
I believed him, and maybe…maybe if this conversation had come later, it would have been easier to process. Right now, it was like being handed what you wanted most after suffering a great tragedy. And that was what had happened in a way.
“I need you to know something.” Caden reached out, taking my hands. When I didn’t flinch away, he threaded his fingers with mine. “I am here. I know you need time, and if it takes a hundred years, so be it. I’ll wait. What I feel for you is not going to change. Not today. Not next year. Not fifty years from now. You tell me when you’re ready, and I’ll be there.”
My throat closed off, and now I really wanted to cry, because…God. That was exactly what I needed to hear. What I needed to know. That he’d be there when I was ready. That I could have time to piece myself back together, to find myself again, and then I could find him.
“I need to check in with Tanner and see about getting some food sent up to you,” Caden said after a couple of moments. “Then, if you’re feeling up to moving around, maybe we can go outside. Get some fresh air. What do you think?”
The breath I took was shaky, but it felt good. It felt clean. “That sounds good.”
“Perfect.” A smile appeared, and then what happened next surprised me.
Caden rose and then lowered his head, kissing my forehead. I hadn’t expected that. I also was surprised that I didn’t recoil or flip out.
“See you in a little bit.”
I might’ve nodded. I didn’t know. But he left, and I just sat there. I didn’t know for how long. I just absorbed everything he had told me.
Caden loved me.
The King of the Summer fae loved me.
In a daze, I rose from the bed and showered, wrapping the fluffy robe around me. And when I returned to the bedroom, sore and more tired than I wanted to be, I was still caught in the grasp of confusion, but an intense rush of emotions brimmed just under the surface.
The King loved me.
I stopped in the center of the room, behind the cream-colored couch.
Caden had ended the engagement before he even knew that I was missing.
None of that changed how badly he’d messed up, but I…I loved him, and that hadn’t changed. And the most wondrous thing happened. Just like when I realized how awe-inspiring it was to still feel attraction, a sense of hope rose for the first time since…since Aric had taken me. I knew that I could move on from what had happened, even if moving on took a long time. Because I could still feel love, and Caden—
A memory surfaced, one of Aric and I when I was bathing and glamoured but aware of what he was saying.
A certain member of the Summer Court who, like me, wishes to see the return of the Queen.
Oh, my God.
There was someone within the Summer Court working with Aric. Someone who claimed that they could bring Aric the mortuus.
I needed to find Caden. I started toward the door just as a knock sounded. Expecting it to be Ivy or Caden, I called out, “Come in.”
The door opened, and my lips parted. It wasn’t Ivy or Caden.
Tatiana stood in the doorway.
Chapter 19
Although I’d only seen Tatiana briefly, she was as beautiful as I remembered.
Raven-haired and statuesque, her skin tone was a deep silvery hue, and her ears were delicately pointed. Tatiana didn’t attempt to glamour herself as she stood before me, hands clasped in front of her. She wore an off-the-shoulder dress the color of buttercream that hugged her breasts and waist before flaring out at the hips.
Tatiana looked like an ethereal princess straight out of a Disney movie, while I looked like I’d gone a few rounds with a meat grinder and was currently starring in a horror flick.
Not exactly how I wanted to look when I came face to face with Caden’s fiancée—ex-fiancée.
I stared at the would-be Queen, wishing that there had been clothes for me to wear. Maybe a head-to-toe bodysuit. Anything would be better than the lumpy, shapeless robe I currently wore.
“I hope I am not intruding,” she said, her voice carrying a soft lilt that reminded me of someone who was from Great Britain. “But I was hoping you had a few minutes to spare.”
Wondering how rude it would be to say no, I looked around the room like an idiot. Based on what Caden had told me this morning, I had a good idea of what this conversation would be about. And considering that I hadn’t even had a drink of anything other than the berry water, I really wasn’t mentally prepared for this. But more importantly, I needed to find Caden and tell him what I remembered.
Instead, I said, “Sure. Would you like to sit?”
She nodded, and I limped my way to the couch. I was a little too relieved to be sitting. The shower really took a lot out of me, so I plopped down like a horse falling over.
Tatiana sat on the other side of the couch, as graceful as a ballerina, crossing and tucking her ankles and resting her hands in her lap. “How are you feeling?”
“Um, better than I look.” Which was true.
A faint smile appeared. “I’m relieved to hear that. Your injuries are…frightening.”
I blinked.
“I mean, they don’t frighten me, but you must have suffered greatly,” she rushed to correct herself. “I am glad to hear that you killed your tormentor.”
“Yeah,” I said, curling my fingers around the sash of my robe. “I am glad…I killed him.”
Did that sound as dumb as it did to me?
“Aric has haunted the King for far too long,” Tatiana added, surprising me. “What he did to the King’s fiancée all those years ago was an act of pure evil.”
“You…you know about that?”
“Everyone knows what Aric did.” Her head cocked to the side as a frown pinched her brow. “Well, the Summer fae know.”