I watch as the ambulance drives off with its flashing lights fading in the distance, wondering why this lady is still standing beside me and not following behind her son. I walk away without saying a word, allowing her arm to fall to her side. I appreciate what Anna did for me, giving me a place to crash last night, but I’m beginning to see why B is the way she is. Why she is so bitter–so angry. I barely know the Porters, but I can see now that B and her brother have not had the love and guidance that they need.
I stand in the front of the Porter house with a feeling of estrangement. Unsure where to go from here. I can’t go back to Val’s. That may be Dad’s home, but it’s not mine. I can’t live in that house and pretend that life is normal. It’s like one day we just packed up our entire past and brought it into a stranger’s house and expected the future to be bright. It doesn’t work like that and I’m certainly not going to fake it for anyone, not even Dad.
Anna had told me that I was welcome to stay in the guest house as long as I needed, but it doesn’t feel right. Not after what happened. Staying in a stranger's house while she drank endless glasses of wine, to the point she could barely even walk. I found myself picking her ass up off the floor and tucking her in on the couch. There is more drama in that household than I’ve encountered in my entire life. I need to get away from here. I need to go home.
I pull my phone out of my pocket and realize that I’m going to be late for school if I don’t get going right now. There goes another day of working on our project. I can’t imagine that B will show up to school today. It’s ironic how the morning started off with me still being pissed at her and now she’s sharing the same emotion. Maybe it’s best this way. We continue to go round and round, and I’m not sure that I want to try and figure this girl out. She has too much going on in that head of hers, and I need to stay focused.
“Jasper.”
I turn around and see Knox coming toward me.
Fuck my life.
“What do you want?” I hiss, glaring at him with a stare that screams, don’t try me right now.
“We need to talk. Whether you like it or not. We have to figure this shit out.”
I can see the effects of our fight last night on his face. A black eye and a swollen cheek. Shit, I didn’t think it was that bad. That’s what he gets. He threw the first punch and gave me this fat lip that’s been bleeding nonstop. Maybe he’ll get the hint that nobody fucks with me without repercussions.
“I don’t have time for this. I have to get to class.” I push past him and make my way toward my car. When I round the corner to get in, I see him opening the passenger door. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Catching a ride. We can talk while you drive.”
“Get lost, Knox. There isn’t anything to talk about. You hate me, I hate you. The end. Just stay out of my way, and we will be just fine.”
“This isn’t about you or me. This is about my mom and your dad. Now get in the fucking car and drive or we’re both going to be late.” He opens the door and gets in, slamming it shut.
I release a drawn-out sigh and climb in. “If you think we are going to have some heart to heart about life, you’re sadly mistaken.” I start the engine and back out of the driveway. “Aren’t you even going to ask what happened to Talon?”
“I already know. Blakely called me from the ambulance. He’ll be fine. This isn’t the first time that Talon has drank too much.”
“You all act like this shit is normal. It’s not normal. How can you sit back and watch what B and Talon have to go through on a daily basis and do nothing about it?”
“Man, you don’t even know the half of it. I am glad that you’re beginning to realize that it isn’t all rainbows and unicorns for Blakely. She’s had a tough start to life, and it’s really messed with her. All the more reason to stay away from her.”
In an instant reaction, I slam on the brake and swerve to the side of the road, causing the car behind me to lay on his horn when he flies around me.
“If you say that one more time, I swear to…”
“Jasper, you don’t get it,” he cuts me off, “I’m not saying this because I want Blakely or because I hate you, I’m telling you this because I know…” he trails off.
“You know what?”
“Because I know that this will end in a disaster. That’s why. I don’t want to see Blakely get hurt, and she will if you two don’t cut ties right now.”
“Unless there is something that you aren’t telling me, then back the fuck off and stay out of my business.” I shift into drive and burn out, whipping gravel behind me.
“Ok, I’ll drop it, for now. That isn’t what I wanted to talk about anyway. I want to talk about my mom. She’s happy with your dad, and it’s the first time in a long time she’s woken up each day smiling and gone to bed with that same smile. And, I happen to like your dad. He’s a good man.”
“He’s the best,” I say, keeping my eyes on the road. Realizing that this is the first time Knox and I have ever agreed on anything. “Look, I want my dad to be happy, too. I just can’t live in that house and pretend that I like it.”
“It’s five more months. Then you can go to school at UCLA and live your life.”
“How did you know I was going to UCLA?”
“Your dad told me. I’m going there, too. At least, that’s the plan.”
My head twists around quicker than the demonic girl on The Exorcism, “The fuck if you are!”
“What is your problem with me? Why do you hate me so damn much?” His voice grows louder, and it’s a tone that I’m familiar with. One that has the capability of escalating things very quickly between the both of us.
I could say something smart ass, but it’s only eight o’clock in the morning and I’m already exhausted from lack of sleep and a tense morning. “Why the hell do you hate me so much?”
“Well, let’s see. Your first day in the house you started demanding shit.” He holds up his hand and begins counting his fingers. “You disrespect my mom and you disrespect me. And, not to mention this black eye you gave me. You act like you’re better than us.”
Laughter erupts immediately. “I think I’m better than you? What a crock of shit. You look at me like I’m gutter garbage. Your mom looks at me like I’m some charity case.” I pull into the parking lot at Redwood High, and I think we’re both surprised that we made this drive without killing one another.
“Just come back home. Make your dad happy and I’ll stay out of your way.”
I can’t believe what I’m about to say. But I say it. “I’ll think about it.” I reach for the handle to get out. “Under one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“Tell me the truth. Did you sleep with her?”
He doesn’t even hesitate; he just says it. “Yes, I did sleep with her.”
Rage builds as I grind my teeth, trying to contain my fury.
“But I didn’t have sex with her.”
I let out a sigh and release my grip on the door handle.