“He probably didn’t. To him, anyone not from here is from outer space.”
Andy rested a hand on her shoulder as she bent over laughing. Carla couldn’t help but join her.
“Where do you live?” Andy asked, gaining some control of herself.
“Phoenix.”
“Oh, wow, so you’re in a whole other galaxy.”
“Yep.”
They continued to laugh. “It’s so nice to meet someone who shares my Martian status.”
“Well, not totally,” Carla said. “I do have blood relations here. A lot, actually. So, I can easily sneak back under the fence. You, I’m afraid, are hopeless.”
“Oh, thanks. I feel so much better now.” A huge firework boomed in the night sky, and Carla watched it in awe and then looked to Janice. To her surprise Janice was looking directly at her. Carla smiled and waved, but Janice did not return either. Her face was as stoned with pain as it had been earlier with Dakota. She turned away suddenly, as if she could no longer bear to look at Carla, but then glanced back at her as if she couldn’t help it.
Carla felt her world spin as she realized what was happening. Andy was still talking and laughing softly right next to her, hand on her shoulder. Janice was watching with horror, assuming the worst. Carla had no doubt. She could sense it even from where she stood on the other side of the lawn.
And amidst the panic she now felt in seeing Janice’s pain, three things came to her mind. Just as clear as day.
I would rather be here with you.
I find you interesting and…attractive.
I want you to make a move on me.
Carla closed her eyes as the memories she’d been so desperate to recall flooded her. Janice’s voice repeating, declaring, confessing.
She did talk to me. She did tell me how she feels.
And I was too drunk to do anything about it.
“I gotta go,” Carla said, pulling away. She should’ve chased her down and insisted they talk earlier when she’d walked away, but she hadn’t wanted to ruin the rest of the holiday for her by causing any more stress. She hadn’t seemed to be okay with anything Carla had said, so Carla had feared discussing it any further in their current surroundings wouldn’t have been a good idea.
Carla crossed the lawn, weaving through pockets of people. Janice saw her coming and she said something to the boys and then hurried from the crowd. She disappeared in the darkness and Carla realized she’d been headed toward the parked vehicles. More fireworks exploded in the sky, and when Carla finally did locate her, her heart sank. Janice had made it to her car and Carla watched helplessly as she sped out of the driveway, kicking up gravel. Carla stared after her until her taillights were swallowed up in the dark.
And then, one final thing Janice had said floated through her mind.
Carla is no longer interested in love and relationships.
Carla knew then that she had to follow her. Knew for certain that she had to talk to her.
About everything. All of it.
She knew what doing so meant and knew what all that would entail.
She didn’t, however, know what the outcome would be.
Nevertheless, it had to be done.
Janice was hurting, not just in jealousy, but in her hiding.
Carla couldn’t let that continue, especially knowing it had everything to do with her.
Her own fears, which she had to admit, she’d been deferring to as well, needed to be put to rest once and for all.
She looked up at the sky as another huge rocket burst into a ball of red sparkles. The beauty of it was lost on her, though.
Because all she could think about was how she hoped that wouldn’t soon be her heart.
Chapter Twenty-one
Janice hurriedly retrieved an unopened bottle of wine from the rack next to the fridge and then struggled to uncork it. Her hands had begun to tremble on the frenzied drive home from Maurine’s and they didn’t appear to be calming anytime soon. She cursed loudly as she lost control of the bottle and nearly dropped it on the floor. She stilled, with a firm grip on the wine and forced herself to take a few deep breaths, in order to get control of herself. The breathing helped some, but her mind and heart kept racing just as they’d done when she’d peeled out of the drive back at Maurine’s with those beautiful, booming fireworks shaking the earth and Carla Sims shaking her entire being.
The cork popped on the wine, startling her and causing her to lose her balance from having pulled so hard to free it. She quickly righted herself and filled a glass and took a few deep swallows, praying it would help to ease the aching and anguish currently torturing her. But her mind kept returning to Carla and the mystery woman she’d been laughing with. The woman who’d been touching her, behaving like they knew each other well, like they were familiar. Too familiar. Who was she? She’d never seen her before and neither had Maurine or Erica. And her looks hadn’t exactly helped matters any. She was gorgeous and fit with a short, stylish haircut that Janice couldn’t help but let lead her to wonder about her sexuality.
She drank as she thought about Carla possibly knowing the woman on an intimate level. Her stomach tightened and a painful churning began, just as it had when she’d watched Dakota all but drool over Carla right in front of her. Carla hadn’t had any interest in Dakota and she’d quickly run her off, that much she knew. But Carla had appeared to be behaving differently with the mystery woman. She hadn’t run her off. And she wasn’t acting disinterested or standoffish. It had been quite the opposite from her viewpoint.
She fought bending to quell the ache in her gut, knowing full well what was happening but still battling like hell to admit it. She was way too old to feel something as ridiculous and silly as jealousy. Especially since she’d never been jealous before. Over anyone. So, it couldn’t suddenly be hitting her now. Why would it? No, it didn’t make sense.
She swallowed down the reason and truth with more wine, doing her best to drown them, to drown out even the slightest thought that her feelings for Carla were stronger than any she’d ever had for anybody else and that was why she was suddenly experiencing things like jealousy. She finished the glass, flooding that relentless and pesky truth with alcohol until it was saturated enough to ease a bit and allow a soothing warmth to spread through her. There. That was a little better. The world wasn’t ending. Even if Carla had interest in another woman. Life would go on.
It would.
Right?
She grabbed both the glass and the bottle and crossed into the living room to head for her bedroom, intent on going to bed to submerge any and all doubts in the wine until she was drunk enough to fall asleep. Hopefully, she would be deep in a peaceful dreamland well before Carla came home. If she came home. The pain came again as she considered that Carla may go home to spend the night with the woman.
She lowered her head and hurried through the living room before the churning overcame her. But a smooth, familiar voice stopped her dead in her tracks.
“Hi.” Carla was standing near the couch, apparently having entered the house silently, keys still in her hand. The look on her face showed a hint of genuine concern, but it was heavily overshadowed by a look of sheer determination. Just what she was determined to do or say, Janice wasn’t sure. But the possibilities caused her hands to tremble again.