“Krishna.” I looked up from my lap and met the sad eyes of Mahogany. After Amell had been escorted out the courtroom we were all escorted to the judge’s chambers. I thought JD would stick around but once the first guilty verdict had been read, he walked out the courtroom in tears.
“I’ll wait right here for you.” My mother squeezed my hand before I walked past Noelani and Cassian. She was crying holding her very pregnant belly while Cassian tried to console her. Atlas, poor soul, he wore dark shades but it was evident by the tears pouring down his face that he was indeed rocked by whatever happened behind those doors. Keatyn gave me a soft smile and kissed my cheek before I walked in.
“Gazelle.” Amell stood in the middle of the room in a white jumpsuit with his arms out looking like my forever favorite knight.
Even with his hair grown out and unkept beard that was growing in, he was still the most handsome man I ever seen. Those onyx eyes met mine and I ran into his arms not caring who else was in the room with us.
It had been many, many moons since I heard his voice. Many, many moons since I felt his touch. Many, many moons since I saw his face.
“Amell,” I cried in his chest. “Why are you doing this?” I sobbed not giving a damn about the snot and drool I passed onto his new uniform.
“Grant me this, Krishna. Please.” What was he asking? Grant him permission to leave me voluntarily. What type of shit is this?
“Watch over Jeremy.” He placed me back on the solid ground cupping my face. “ Make sure he doesn’t half ass in school. I gave Mahogany specific instructions on how to handle his trust fund.
“Amell…” he kissed me silent. Each time I tried to ask questions he’d kiss my words away. I was growing weak in his arms from all of his sweet kisses.
“Promise me, Krishna.” Those menacing dark onyx orbs held me hostage.
“No, Amell.” I didn’t want to hear any of his promises.
“Yes, Gazelle. You have to promise that you’ll never go after Miguel.” What the fuck? Is he serious?
I managed to break free and shove him in his chest. It was useless since it did nothing to him. All he did was blink. “No.” I firmly stated.
I remembered the first time I saw him when I walked into the foyer of my Uncle’s house all those years ago. Arguing with my mother over my punishment and being rewarded with beauty. He was my chocolate beauty. Subconsciously I touched my lips remembering our first kiss.
He surprised me when he kissed me slowly and passionately. A man of his caliber, I just knew he was going to be a rough kisser and lover. Amell Kalmin was the total opposite when it came to me. His kisses, he always kissed me like it was the last one. So gentle, passionate, and romantic.
My sensual thug.
“I’m setting you free, Krishna.” He kept trying to shove a pen in my hand and I had no idea why.
“Wait…Amell, I have to tell you…”
“I want a divorce.”
Did he just… A divorce.
He wants to set me free.
My ears filled with static noise. My heart slowed almost completely stopping. My vision, I couldn’t see.
Taking a step back my eyes trailed down his large, tall length until I spotted the pen in his hands. “I’m setting you free, Gazelle.” I tried to read his face. Tried to read the look in his eyes. All I got was hollowness.
He had already closed himself off to me.
Set me free?
It was him who barged into my apartment six years ago at three in the morning on April 23rd demanding that we marry when the courthouse opened. Atlas had broken the curse Amell thought hovered over them and married the love of his life, then went on to have children. Cassian wasn’t too far behind, falling in love with my best friend.
Two of the three Kalmin brothers had done the unthinkable. Something all of them thought was imaginable.
Amell came to me and asked for my hand in marriage. I never wanted anything more in my life than to be Mrs. Amell Kalmin. When the courthouse opened we were there ready to exchange vows and change my last name. Two hours later we were on a private chartered jet headed to Amsterdam where we spent three glorious weeks on our honeymoon.
Once we came back, we split like we weren’t legally husband and wife. I went back to Cali and he went back to Florida. Us marrying complicated things. Many things. So many things and neither of us were ready to tackle them at the time so we kept it a secret. It was safer for us to continue as we did. The more the years passed on the more he and I sought each other. We planned on throwing a surprise reception on the compound right before my father died to tell everyone.
Guess that was never going to happen since he was setting me free.
“I fucking hate you.” I screamed, slapping him in the face. His nose flared and jaw clenched. “You’re just a fucking joke and a coward. This is what I mean to you? Huh? Trying to take the easy way out.” With each word I spewed I pounded my fist into his chest.
Defeated, he let me.
“Krish…”
I slapped him again before he could finish. “Don’t say my name. Why Amell? Why are you doing all of this?”
Cupping my face, he rubbed his nose along my jaw and kissed my lips. I fought myself. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to pine over him or sob.
“The love and desire I have for you has never been safe, Gazelle. My need for you has always been dire. Never in my life have I ever craved anything or anyone as much as I crave you, not even my next breath. You taught me that love is many things. It varied. It’s parallel but never unsure. When I’m making love to you in the most intimate way possible, it’s like I’m time traveling through your body driven by your sounds. The perfect sound bath.”
Unable to take his cruel torture, I wiggled my way out of his arms. “You want to divorce me then do what I know you can, set yourself free and ask me then. Remember this day, Amell. When I say that I hate you, I loathe you to the point that my soul feels like it is being eaten alive by your lying leches. I never wanna see you again. I never want you to contact me. The day you get out, have Mahogany find me to mail the papers. Until then, enjoy suffering in prison knowing that you broke me and everyone else you love because you’re trying to play God by avenging problems that aren’t yours.”
Refusing to look back I walked out of there and ran straight into my mother’s arms. “Krishna, breathe. Sweety, calm down and breathe.”
“He…He…” I felt like I was about to pass out. “He doesn’t want me anymore.”
Amell
Six Months Later
I taught my brothers to forsake the foolish and live. I taught them to know the difference between genuine friends and a wolf disguised as a friend, who are fools that will make you forget your understanding and wisdom by their manipulative behavior. I raised them to be wise. I treated them how I wanted them to grow up wise men. I gave them instruction in my teaching, and they increased in learning.
I’ve always led my brothers in the way of wisdom and good doing. Even in the midst of the paths of judgment from the outside evil world, they knew which way to go. They knew not to follow the ways of a fool.
This level of knowledge started with my father’s teaching and increased when Mitch took on that role. I’ve always been a wise individual regardless of my actions and I expected nothing less than the same from JD, Cassian, and Atlas. Minus us working in certain illegal fields, we were on the straight and narrow of things.