“Oh, my God.” My next breath catches in my throat.
Alex’s hand drops to my knee. I jump at his touch and pound my fist against the passenger window. “You have to stop!” I screech at an unfathomable decibel. “Please stop the car!”
“What is it?” he barks, probably more in relation to my alarm than his own temper. I hit the window again, half crazed with a desperation to get out of the car.
“It’s Clarissa. One—she’s one of my friends. I have to help her!” I’d recognize her anywhere, having spent nearly two years with her, but it’s the cherry red platform stilettos that caught my attention. Her signature color to go with her straight red hair and bright red lipstick, a persona created by the boss.
I barely register the car slow to a stop through my hysteria. “Shh. Shh, you have to calm down. Talk to me. Who is she?”
The dam breaks, and tears flood my cheeks as I turn to look at him. “She was there with me. One of my friends. I, oh God, I left them all behind.” The car starts moving again, but I don’t have the energy to fight. Reality crashes down on me. For the first time since I woke up with Sin and Elias, I remember the others. It hits me with the force of a tsunami that they’re all still stuck in the place I’ve been moving on from, and I haven’t done anything to help them. That the nightmare I was lucky enough to leave is still very much a reality for these girls I care about.
Through my sobs, I hear Alex speaking to someone on his phone, but I don’t have the energy to care much who it is. My mind keeps replaying my last memory of Clarissa, lying on that mattress smoking a cigarette, to seeing her now hustling down an alley.
“Please stop, why are we moving?” I unbuckle my belt and kneel in my seat to watch the city begin to fade behind us. We’re moving down the highway and away from where I last saw her.
“Dammit, put your seat belt on. We’re driving down the highway.”
“You have to stop!” I cry, ignoring him.
“You’ll be no use to your friends if we get into an accident,” he growls, glancing behind us to switch lanes.
I swipe angrily at my face and face him. “We need to help her.”
“Baby, we will,” Alex replies in a gentled voice. I can see the concern crinkled in the corners of his eyes. “Just not like this.”
Forcing a deep breath, I retake my seat and buckle up. The belt clicks, and Alex mutters, “Thank Christ.”
“What do we do?”
He sighs. “I don’t know.” He cuts me a sharp glance. “Yet. What I do know is she wasn’t alone down there, and I can’t just pull over and grab her off the streets. For one, you’re with me, and I won’t compromise your safety like that. Someone could see you. For all they know, you’re dead like they intended. I’d like it to stay that way. Forever, if possible.” He gives me a sad, furrowed look.
I scrub my eyes tiredly with the back of my hand. “And for two?”
“We need a plan.” The car slows and stops. When I look up, I realize we’re outside his apartment.
“I thought we were swinging by Sinclair’s?”
He stares out the windshield, his hand on the ignition. “I thought it’d be best to bring you home. I pushed too hard, and something happened you weren’t ready for. I take full responsibility for that.”
I bite my bottom lip at his thoughtfulness. “You didn’t know …”
Alex turns the car off. “I should have.”
With that parting thought, he exits and walks to my door. I slide out and follow him up the stairwell to his apartment. I immediately kick off my shoes and wander into the kitchen as Alex yanks off his leather jacket. My mind is blank as I make quick work of putting together a turkey club sandwich. I have the first bite in my mouth when I look up at Alex. “Do you want one?” I ask around a mouthful.
He leans against the closed door with his colorful arms crossing his chest. There’s a small sparkle in his eyes, a contrast to the look from moments ago in the car.
Not understanding his behavior, I take a second bite, and ask, “What?”
His lips twist into an amused smirk. “Blossom,” he says.
I wipe the sides of my mouth self-consciously. “What is it?” I ask, slower this time.
Alex looks to his feet while shaking his head. He pushes off from the door, stalks across the open-plan room and into the kitchen. His large arm circles my head, and I feel his lips against the crown.
“I’m so fuckin’ proud of you,” he murmurs there before letting go. Without another word, he walks to his room.
“What is happening?” I shout after him, more confused than I’ve felt in a long time.
With nothing on but a pair of low riding gray sweats, Alex reenters the room tugging on a fresh black T-shirt. “You made yourself a sandwich.”
Said sandwich gets paused midair on the way to my mouth while my mind works over what he said. “Am I missing something?”
He chuckles. “Yeah. What you’re missin’ is you’re getting comfortable with me. Sorry to point it out, but you makin’ yourself something to eat without even asking or waitin’ for me to feed you is a huge deal.”
I roll my eyes and can’t stop the grin from spreading across my face. I tear off another bite while feeling his praise warm me from the inside. “Do you want one? I think I’m going to lie down after this.” I finish my last bite and wipe the crumbs into the sink.
“I’ll make something later. Go on to bed, blossom. I’ll catch up in a bit.”
“Okay,” I answer and start to pack up the ingredients, but Alex stops me.
“I got it,” he says gently while plucking the jar of mayonnaise from my hands. His gaze roams my face. The look in his eyes sends warmth rushing through me, a feeling so brand new, yet I’m already beginning to love it.
“Thanks.” I grin and walk to his room.
After changing into one of his tees, I remove my sweats since I wore them all day and crawl beneath his sheets. As my head hits his pillow, I feel the conflict inside swirling. Seeing Clarissa and not knowing how to help those girls is one of the hardest things I need to face. The physical trauma I went through, the withdrawals, the healing, was hard as hell to overcome. And I know I owe most of my progress to Alex and Elias. The part that upsets me most is not knowing if I ever will be able to help them. And how will I move on with my life if I can’t?
I take a deep breath, feeling the tiredness deep in my bones. His woodsy scent of pine and soap calms the last remnants of anxiety from the day, and I’m able to drift off easily to sleep.
Chapter Thirteen
Sin
The warmth in my chest dissipates the moment the door to my bedroom shuts, an arctic chill taking its place. Shelby’s freak-out in the car returns to my mind with a vengeance. The images are so strong that I find myself settling on the couch with my head braced in my hands. What the fuck am I going to do?
And what the fuck am I doing here?
A shift in our tumultuous … relationship? Is that what this is? Whatever the fuck it’s called doesn’t matter. It’s a man helping a woman. A shy, gorgeous, spirited, healing, tempting woman. But even as hardheaded as I am, I can’t deny the fact that something is happening between us.