For the first time in my life, I don’t want to be an unknown. I want to be a skateboarder people respect and look up to, and I want to deserve it on my own merits, not because I’m Beckett Steele’s girlfriend. I want to do something gutsy and maybe a little crazy.
As it turns out, it doesn’t really end up being a decision at all. It just kind of happens. Okay fine, 720s don’t kind of “just happen” by accident, but that deep burn to do it overcomes me to the point my body obeys whether my mind okays it or not.
One minute I’m doing my run as planned, and the next I see the vert in front of me and I’m going for a 720. It plays out quickly in my mind, and I know I must have been dreaming about it all night. Crouching low, I swoop up until I’m horizontal to the ground. My hand grasps my board as my body launches above the coping and into the air. There’s no opportunity for my mind to second-guess what the hell is going on because my body is operating of its own accord, spinning in the air. The movements are tight and confident, and before I know it, I’ve completed two cycles and gravity is pulling me back down.
There’s a brief flash of alarm – this is really happening – but I surrender. My head and its doubts and anxieties snap off and let my body control the next few seconds. The landing is smooth – the most solid of the handful of 720s I’ve stuck thus far – and the rest of my run is a haze. I nearly miss hearing the buzzer sound the end of the session. That could be because the crowd is cheering so loudly, but more likely it’s because I’m in a vacuum, all functions above my shoulders and neck checked out as I rely exclusively on the rest of my body to carry me through.
There aren’t any of my closest friends to high-five or hug when I dismount. However, the moment finally comes into focus when a few of the women I hung out with last night congratulate me in the way my friends would. It’s not quite the same, but I sense their excitement and wonder. A girl has landed a new trick at a competition for the first time. I’m not the first female to do a 720 but it’s never been completed in this particular setting, and there’s something special about that, even if it’s not necessarily making history.
My vision clears and my brain turns back on, acknowledging the electric buzz in the air. The charge hums through my veins, forcing me to accept that the energy from the people around me is a result of what I just did.
Well, I didn’t want to be an unknown anymore in the skateboarding world, and, as I let my eyes wander, it’s clear I’ve shattered that goal. This is exactly what I want to be recognized for, my skateboarding feats. A deep sense of pride washes over me. I’ve forced people to see the parts of me I want to be known for, and while I know it’s not always going to be easy with a boyfriend like Beckett Steele, it finally feels like I’m truly the one in the driver’s seat of my skateboarding career.
Beck
I missed it. I can’t believe I let her talk me out of going up to Vancouver. I can’t believe she went for it, and landed it, in competition. I mean, I can, but damn. That’s bold. It’s shocking to me even, and I’m the only one who knew she’d landed it a few times already.
By the time Jordan called me Saturday night to tell me, I’d already heard. The event wasn’t big enough to be televised, but I was following the live feed on Twitter. Naomi, Summer, and Griff were with me. It was going on at the same time the Eileen show went live, so I was only half paying attention to watching myself on screen.
She flew back Sunday night, but with meetings in LA this morning, I couldn’t be there to pick her up at the airport. Now it’s Monday, and she’s got classes tomorrow morning but I’m not waiting until Thursday night when classes are done like we usually do. Unfortunately, I get stuck in rush hour and by the time I pull into the condo parking lot, it feels like months not days since I’ve seen her. She opens the door before I reach her condo, and I know immediately I’m not alone in my desperation. Jordan nearly knocks me down with the force of her hug, and I drop my overnight bag in order to reciprocate.
Her level of fame might have gone from minor to major since I last saw her, but she still feels and smells just like Jordan. She’s still my girl.
“I can’t decide if I’m mad at you,” I tell her even as I bury my head in the crook of her neck and kiss behind her ear.
“Mad at me?” Her voice sounds all throaty and I want to push her up along the wall right here, even if we’re outside where anyone could walk by.
“Yeah. I wouldn’t have let you talk me out of coming up to Vancouver Saturday if I’d known you were going to go for the 720. You made me miss the most important thing that’s happened in your skateboarding career so far.”
I pull away a few inches before I do follow through with feeling her up against the side of the building.
Jordan eyes me, biting her lower lip. “Come on, let’s get inside where we can talk.”
“Talk?” I guess I started it, but I hope that’s not all she has in mind.
Jordan looks over her shoulder as she opens the door to her condo. “About why you’re mad at me. And then we can make up.”
She flashes a knowing grin and I find myself nodding agreement.
“Oh okay. I’m down with that.”
Grabbing my bag, I let her lead me upstairs. Lucy is at the kitchen counter doing homework and she waves hello. I’d normally stop for a minute but Jordan’s as determined to get up to her room as I am so I settle for a quick wave.
As soon as the door shuts behind me, I move to Jordan, gathering her in my arms like I had her before.
“You were saying you think you’re mad at me?” she reminds me, even as she starts to unbutton the collared shirt I wore for my meetings earlier.
“Yeah. I don’t want to miss these moments in your life, Jordan. The big ones. You could have given me a heads up.”
She reaches the bottom button and her hands move to my shoulders, sliding the shirt off. I watch her take in my naked chest, the sight of her eyes devouring me making me forget again what we’re talking about. Jordan begins to pull her own shirt over her head and my hand instantly reaches to touch her bare skin as she throws the shirt to the side.
“I didn’t know I was going to do it until I did it, Beck. I wasn’t planning on it at first, before the competition. I thought you were right, I should keep practicing and get it nailed down and tight before the X Games for the big reveal. But after Thursday’s prelims I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And then it just kind of happened.” She shrugs, and then she’s unclasping her bra.
My mouth goes dry and my body responds instantly to her nakedness, even before she starts shimmying out of her jeans and underwear. “You still trying to decide if you’re mad?” she asks just before the final piece of clothing is tossed aside and she’s completely nude.
“Uh, mad? No, not mad anymore.”
“Good, take your pants off.”
“Yup, sure, I can do that.”
I feel her soaking in every inch of me with her eyes just as I am doing to her. When I remove the last of my own clothing, I close the distance between us. My lips and hands can’t decide which part of her body they want contact with most. Jordan’s mouth and hands are equally greedy, searing my chest and shoulders, biceps, and abs with their touches. She doesn’t stop until I’m on my knees, my face between her legs and my hands on her ass. Her hands rest on my head, fingers twined in my hair. It doesn’t take long before her legs begin to shake and I’m supporting her weight, watching under my eyelashes as her head drops back. One of these days we’ll be alone and she won’t have to hold back the sounds I want to hear. But the visual of Jordan losing herself like this is enough, for now.