She jumped when she noticed me watching her in the mirror, placing her hand over her chest. “Oh my God. You scared me.”
“That was fucking amazing,” I said, entering the room.
“You came back faster than I thought you would. Otherwise I wouldn’t have—”
“I know. That’s what’s so amazing about it, getting to see you in your natural element.” I slid my hand down the smooth skin of her back. “You’re beautiful and brave. I wish I could’ve seen you dance on stage, but seeing you dance like this? Naked in my room? That’s the stuff dreams are made of.”
She got up on her tippy toes to kiss me. I loved that she wasn’t rushing to put clothes on, that she was comfortable baring herself in front of me.
“I would’ve loved to see you play football,” she said. “I know how painful it is for you to even think about those days, but I bet you were incredible in action.”
I sighed. “I wish I could go back to playing casually. Just because something stops your professional career doesn’t mean you can’t ever do it again—I get that. But every time I’ve considered returning to it for fun, I chicken out. I haven’t touched a football in years. On some level, though, I know figuring out a way to play would be good for me. It’d be therapeutic.” I brought her lips to mine. “Maybe someday I’ll get there. You motivate me.”
Carys grabbed my ass. “I can imagine how sexy you looked all suited up in that gear, too.”
I still had my old jersey tucked away in a box at the back of my closet. It was the one memento I’d kept and taken with me everywhere I moved. I walked over to my closet and located the box. When I took out the royal blue jersey, my heart raced. I hadn’t so much as touched the fabric since the day I’d put it away nearly a decade ago. Seeing my number and Mathers written across the back gave me chills.
Carys’s jaw dropped. “Oh my God. Is that—”
Still looking down at it, I nodded. “My jersey.”
“Number eight.”
I sighed. “Yep.”
Slipping it over my head, I quickly realized it was a little tight. I’d bulked up a bit in muscle since college. I looked at myself in the mirror for a while. Carys stood next to me, still gloriously naked. I was almost a foot taller than her.
She moved behind me, wrapping her arms around my waist. “I know it wasn’t easy for you to put that on.”
“Well, you’ve inspired me. You always do.” I turned around to face her.
She flashed an impish grin. “Seeing you in this shirt is turning me on a little.”
My brow lifted. “Yeah?” I pressed my chest into her naked body. “You want to fuck the quarterback, you dirty girl?”
“Actually, yeah. I do. Only if he’s you.”
I lowered my hands to her pussy and circled her opening with my fingers. “Holy fuck. You’re wet.”
Her cheeks flushed. “It doesn’t take much with you.”
My dick felt ready to explode, and I wasn’t even inside her yet. I’d never been as insatiable in my life as I’d been the past few weeks with her. This moment might have been the pinnacle.
She slipped her hands up through my shirt as I continued to finger her, devouring her lips. With every moan, I got harder until I couldn’t take it anymore. We collapsed onto the bed. We’d had sex a half-hour ago, but I needed her again.
I fished a condom out of the drawer as fast as I could and sheathed my engorged shaft, so eager to slip inside of her.
I nearly came the second I felt her hot, tight pussy wrap around my cock.
Even though I was conscious of the sitter next door, I couldn’t help myself as I thrust in and out of Carys, causing the bed to creak and the headboard to bang against the wall. It would be a while before I got to do this again—at least until tonight—and that wouldn’t be soon enough. What can I say? We were making up for lost time.
“Deacon,” she panted as I rammed into her.
I fucking loved when she said my name while I was inside of her. I loved when she said anything at all during sex. She wasn’t always vocal, but when she was, it put me over the edge.
“Say my name again.”
“Deacon.”
“Again.” I thrust into her harder. “Say my fucking name.”
“Deacon…Deacon…Deacon.”
“Fuck, Carys. What am I gonna do with you? I want you all freaking day.”
She grabbed my ass and pushed me deeper. “Take me whenever you want me.”
At that, I lost it. I shot my load prematurely, something that hadn’t happened since high school. But lately it had been happening quite a bit.
“Shit. I’m sorry. I just can’t control it with you sometimes.”
“It’s okay. I love it when you lose control.”
When my breathing finally calmed, I turned to her. “I might need a shot to calm myself down, like the opposite of Viagra.”
“Do you hear me complaining?” She flashed me the most adorable smile.
Since I’d come before Carys had a chance to finish, I pulled out and buried my head between her legs, bringing her to orgasm with my mouth a few minutes later.
After, we lay across from each other, savoring the final moments of alone time.
Holding her close, I confessed, “I can’t remember the last time I was this happy. Thank you for making it impossible to resist you, so I didn’t make a huge mistake by going to Tokyo.”
“You make me happy. But you scare me, too,” she admitted.
I nodded, feeling my heart squeeze. I’d given her every reason to be scared, because I’d told her I was destined to fuck up. I vowed to do everything in my power to not let that happen, though.
“I know I scare you. And that’s mostly my fault. I haven’t been in a relationship since I was in college. I hadn’t wanted to be in one until I found you. You’ve changed me. You make me want to be a better man. I still don’t trust myself. It comes from years of self-doubt, but those are my issues and have no bearing on how I feel about you.”
Carys looked deep in thought. “We’re all fucked-up in different ways, Deacon. I never planned on being in another relationship. I had all but written it off. So in a sense, we’re both learning as we go here.”
I smiled, her words warming me, making me feel like I didn’t need to have all the answers right now. “I’ve spent way too much time sabotaging myself by worrying about the future. Let’s just take one day at a time. I promise you I’ll do everything in my power not to hurt you.”
“It’s not me I’m worried about. You know that, right?”
Sunny. I nodded. “I know.”
She grabbed my hand and locked my fingers with hers. “But you’re right… Let’s take it one day at a time.”
* * *
Carys returned to her apartment around two in the afternoon, and I went to the gym to burn off some energy. Then I met Adrian at the Starbucks near my apartment. We hadn’t seen each other since the goodbye party he’d thrown me almost a month ago—a wasted effort.
He smiled from ear to ear as he watched me approach the table with my cappuccino.