I tried to remember what I’d been like before him—before the first night he’d come into my room. What my favorite color was, what I liked to eat, and most of all, my favorite song to play on the piano. But that girl no longer existed; she’d been destroyed the night her uncle stole her innocence, but her death had been a slow and painful one. At least that little girl had the audacity to give him a quick and painless death. He hadn’t deserved a death so gracious.
Then my irrational thoughts traveled to what I could have possibly done to ask for it. Had I given my uncle any indication I wanted it? Was I Mayella in To Kill a Mockingbird, and would Ollie see me the same way Atticus saw Mayella? I sighed to myself at the similarity. All along, Dr. Conway had put me through stupid assignments, but only in an effort to remind me.
Clever, Dr. Conway.
Maddie always took the opportunity to talk to me during dinner. We played poker every breakfast and twenty-one every dinner. Each time she brought up the main campus, I changed the subject.
“Dr. Conway is discharging me from here,” I said to her. Maddie continued to play with the deck in her hand as I studied the expression on her face. Not a damn change. She was good.
“So, you’re leaving Dolor for good, then?” she asked.
“No, I’m going back to the main campus.”
Maddie slid two cards across the table in front of me. “I’ve never met Dr. Conway, but it sounds like she really likes you, ya?”
“Yeah, we’ve grown close since I arrived.”
“Maybe I can request her.”
“She normally doesn’t work over here on this side, so I doubt it.” Why was I getting territorial with Dr. Conway? “Hit me.”
Maddie flipped over a ten of hearts, and I threw my head back and groaned.
“You lose, as always. You have the worst bloody luck,” she said through a laugh.
I smiled at her choice of words. “No, trust me. I’m the luckiest girl in the world.”
Because I have Ollie.
Monday morning, I was discharged from the Looney Bin and processed back into the system on the main campus. It had been two and a half weeks since I’d seen Ollie. Every night, I waited for him to come back, but he never showed. Terrified, I wondered if he’d gotten caught because of me. Did they have him in solitary confinement or had they forced him off campus? Was he in prison? Too many thoughts ran through my head, and all I needed was to see him and make sure he was okay.
First, I suffered through another meeting with Dean Lynch, but this time with Dr. Conway by my side. She explained my breakthrough, and I sat quietly beside her as she went over the next steps in the healing process.
“She needs to be back to seeing me twice a week, and involved in group therapy again,” Dr. Conway insisted. “She needs to interact with her friends, get back into a regular routine. Mia has been living in isolation long enough.”
Dean Lynch agreed, but with conditions.
Dr. Conway, Dean Lynch, and I exited the office to find Oscar waiting outside with my suitcase in hand. He wore an official security guard uniform with his black hair gelled back and a small smirk over his smug face. Flashes of our sex-fests from the beginning of the school year swam around in my brain.
“Where’s Stanley?” I asked, glancing over to Dr. Conway. My stomach twisted at the reminder of my indecency.
Dr. Conway opened her mouth, but Dean Lynch interjected, “Stanley is no longer with us. However, Oscar has been in training for four months now and is familiar with our commitment. He’s more than capable of taking care of you.”
Oscar’s smirk grew into a devilish smile, full of white pearly teeth. “As the Dean said, I’ll take great care of you, Mia.”
If the Dean weren’t standing right beside me, I would have punched the smile off his face, but instead, I gave a single nod before he escorted me back to my room.
The halls were empty since everyone was in class, and when I entered my dorm, I was surprised to find the room had changed. White padding covered my walls, and my bed was stripped down to a mattress on the floor with a clean stack of clothes lying on top. No desk to climb on to get to Ollie. The door closed behind me, causing me to flinch.
I turned at the waist as Oscar propped my suitcase against the wall. He untucked his shirt and began undoing his belt. My mouth went dry, but I still managed to speak. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“What do you think I’m doing?” The belt was gone, and he unclasped the button on his slacks. “I’m going to fuck your brains out.”
Shit. “No, Oscar. That’s over. I’m not that person anymore.”
Oscar’s face fell, but a disbelief in his eyes rose. “People don’t change, Mia. You know you want it. Stop teasing me.” He took a step forward, and I backed away.
“You need to leave,” I choked out through a constricted throat.
Instead of obeying, he took steps toward me until I was flush against the wall. “Let’s get one thing straight—I take want I want.”
This wasn’t anything like the Oscar I thought I knew. Perhaps I never noticed it because I willingly gave myself to him.
Stunning both Oscar and myself, I raised my hand and struck his cheek. He brought his hand to his face and cocked his head. There was a look of confusion flashing in his eyes, but his confusion quickly transformed into a fury. He grabbed my wrists and slammed them against the padded wall. “You’re lucky you have what I need, but if you so much as hit me or disobey me again, I’ll drag your ass straight to the dean’s office.”
My eyes went wide. My body went numb. “What do you want from me?” I knew. God, I knew. I just didn’t want to believe it. Powerless.
All over again, powerless.
Oscar’s taunting smile grew. “Today, I only want to touch you, darling.” My jeans were yanked down to my knees. My body went rigid. “Only a little touching.” He pressed his hand over my panties and slid his hand back and forth. “I have a problem, Mia,” he admitted. I wanted to scream, but I couldn’t find my voice—again, silently trapped. “Once you give it to me, you can’t take it back. You belong to me now.”
His fingers stayed over my panties as he continued to rub. “See, not so bad, right?” My throat tightened more, and I clenched my eyes closed. Frozen, I couldn’t even move my head in any direction. All I could do was stand against the wall as my past and his threats choked me.
“No one is going to believe you, you know. I’ve read your file. I know how fucked up you are … using sex as a weapon to get what you want, spreading your legs for strangers, getting caught fucking your previous doctor.” He chuckled and tightened his grip around both wrists as a tear ran down my cheek. “You’ll just be a girl crying wolf.”