I hate playing double agent. Pretending to be someone I’m not.
Those words stood out in my mind.
Agent and pretending.
Then he said something about leaving.
I hated listening in on a conversation because you didn’t get the full picture of what was being discussed.
On this occasion however I couldn’t help it.
It was the result of being so distressed and needing to cling on for hope wherever I could find it.
And damn did I ever think I’d found it when he told me he wouldn’t let Armand take me. Found it and lost it as I listened in on his conversation and my heart squeezed.
What did it mean?
I hated this and hated that Pa’s words came back to me, telling me I didn’t really know Xander. The words came tumbling into my mind as I’d heard him talking on the phone.
I hate playing double agent. Pretending to be someone I’m not…
That was what Xander had said, right?
So, was he an agent?
Pretending?
My breath hitched and curiosity got the better of me. I got up and dressed as quickly as I could. He was going somewhere to meet someone.
I could follow him. Just take a peek and push my fears aside.
I could do that. Maybe I’d heard wrong.
It must have been that.
I left as quickly as I could. He was probably a minute or two ahead of me.
Once I got outside the building I saw him. He was quite a distance ahead but I saw him turn the corner down the alley.
Rushing forward, I watched him go into an old warehouse facility. It was more of a storage place, like the kind Pa used to keep his old stuff.
As quietly and stealthily as I could I went inside and saw it was practically out of use. The kind of place people used as and when. Like when you had an event and needed the space.
Voices echoed from upstairs. It was a muffle with everyone talking at once.
It helped to give me cover to get closer.
I took the stairs up one flight and saw a man in a leather jacket. I found a good hiding spot behind some stacks of boxes. There I saw Xander, a man with a patch over his eye and another blond guy.
The man with the patch seemed to be some sort of authority figure.
He looked annoyed with Xander.
“Look, Xander I get that you have to have a life but there was a reason why I found you. You’re our best hope at getting these things back. It’s fucking selfish of you to put your dick first before the country,” the man balked.
Xander squared off with him looking like he was going to hit him. “Ethan, don’t fucking piss me off. I agreed to this mission.” He shot back. “The few hours I’ve been away didn’t jeopardize anything. I’m here aren’t I?”
“Are you? Listen, I need you a hundred percent.” The man roared. “You have some difficult choices ahead and I need to know you can make them no matter who’s in the way. She’s the fucking mob boss’s daughter, Xander. You don’t know what could happen. You think she’ll choose you over her father if it comes down to it.”
The blond man came forward and stepped in front of them.
“Ethan cool off man. Cool off,” he said.
“We’re close, and I can’t jeopardize this mission. Xander was called in to stop Giovanni in his tracks.” Ethan threw back at the blond guy and my heart actually stopped beating in my chest.
The feeling in my soul told me I’d just stumbled in on an answer I wasn’t prepared for. Something I wasn’t supposed to hear.
“I need to know you’re with us Xander. That means you kill anybody who stands in your way. Anybody.”
“I will do what I need to do,” Xander answered and a gasp slipped from my lips.
My heart…
My heart that had stopped beating only started up again to leap into my throat. It squeezed and my soul shivered, shrieking away from what I’d just heard. Not wanting to believe it.
It couldn’t be true. What Xander said couldn’t be what I’d heard.
Yet… I did.
I’d heard him loud and clear.
Xander said he’d do what he needed to do. That was in response to being asked if he’d kill anyone who stood in his way. Anybody.
There was no mistake about that.
He meant it.
So he’d kill me…
He’d kill me.
I shouldn’t have come out. I should have stayed. Stayed away. Stayed away completely.
From him.
I needed to get out of here. I was in danger this whole time and never realized I was sleeping with the devil.
I left as quickly and quietly as I’d come in. My heart now a shattered mess.
Sleeping with the devil was a big mistake.
Falling for him was another.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Xander
My blood boiled in my veins as I watched Ethan go through the door leading to the back exit of the warehouse.
Even as he left he had the same air of authority he showed when he chewed me out for casting my duties aside.
I didn’t like being called out on anything. Even when I was clearly in the wrong.
It rubbed me the wrong way and left me fuming.
Fuming and furious because I didn’t have a plan.
I thought I could split my focus on the mission and protecting Jia but seeing her earlier and knowing her father planned to kill me if she kept seeing me through me out of sync.
Ethan was one of those people who could hold their own as a leader, but damn did that guy ever piss me off, and at the worst fucking times too.
“Hey bro, you okay?” Wes asked.
I’d almost forgot he was here. It was just us left in the room but I’d had one of those moments when everything just zoomed in on me and I felt like I was alone. Like I’d been swallowed up into a black hole and I was alone.
I turned my attention to Wes.
He could see how worked up I was. As my best friend he knew how worked up I would be just from looking at me.
Honestly, the restraint I’d had to show over the last few weeks with everyone was getting to me, getting to that stage where I could pop.
Pop, like the cork on a wine bottle and go ape shit on everyone. It was like being an inch away from insanity.
“Wes, I don’t know if there’s any point answering that question,” I answered, gritting my teeth.
Wes sighed and shuffled his weight from one foot to the other. “Talk to me bro.”
“God.” I ran a hand through my ruffled hair.
Where did I begin?
“Everything and everyone is getting to me.” That was the short succinct answer.
Being told I had to remember my mission, I couldn’t allow anyone to stand in my way, and I’d have to kill did not help.
That was what Ethan said. He gave me the reminder, but he was also telling me I might have to kill Jia. As if I could.
Jia…
The woman I’d wanted to protect. Jia, the mafia king’s daughter who’d unlocked the door to my heart that had been closed for business for the last five years.
Jia who I’d left at my apartment, sleeping in my bed.
She’d come to me in her distress. It was the first time she’d ever come to me and it was to say goodbye.
Goodbye, and to end this affair we’d had.