“I’m not perfect,” I rushed to say. “I screwed up, pushing you away when I should’ve kept you close. And I’m sorry. I promise next time I won’t run.” The words flowed from me in an effortless sort of stream, and I couldn’t understand why I’d been so nervous before. Being here with him, with our fingers entwined, I’d never felt more at ease. More at home. “Thank you for sticking by me even though I was a pain. And for getting me coffee.”
“Donnie told you about that, huh?” He chuckled. “It was purely selfish, I promise. I couldn’t let you go.”
And thank goodness for that.
I reached up and traced my fingertips along the sharpness of his jaw, back until my hand rested on the side of his neck. “I love you,” I told him, the emotion blooming in my chest, unraveling my sanity. “No one knows the future. But I know I want to face it with you.”
“That—” Lucas’s voice lowered to a whisper as he placed a hand on my waist and pulled me close, “—was tremendously cheesy. I mean it. I cringed a little.”
I shook my head back and forth, and I told him, “Just shut up and kiss me.”
No hesitation. Lucas leaned forward in one swift movement and pressed his lips against mine.
For a moment, the warmth of his mouth shocked me, the way it always used to at first. His lips kissed the cold from mine, responding almost like no time had passed. Heat flooded through me, wiping any trace of my goosebumps. Gosh, it’d been so long since our last kiss. Too long. My head spun with the taste of him, familiar and tender and rich. It turned deeper when I parted my lips beneath his, pulling him closer, closer, until not a sliver of space existed between us.
People still laughed and teased and danced around us, but in that moment, it was just him and me.
I pressed closer, dropping the broom so I could wrap my arms around his neck. It clattered against the ground, but it barely registered.
How I’d lived without this, I had no idea, but I did know I never wanted to do it again. And it’d be different. For me, there was no more running. I wasn’t going to push away those who meant the most to me. I wasn’t going to isolate myself anymore.
Surrounded by Halloween decorations and people in wild costumes, I relaxed in Lucas’s arms, finally knowing things would be all right.
I pulled the pen up from the paper with a sharp breath, looking at the page filled with looping black letters, scrawled by a nervous hand. At the bottom, my scribbled signature was illegible, but the two B’s were clear. Blaire Beverly.
And at the top, two daunting words. Dear Dad.
I never thought I’d write those words. Especially not in this past month since receiving his letter. I honestly hadn’t thought I’d get to this point. Forgiveness had been elusive, intangible, but here I was. The piece of stationary overflowed with lines poured from my heart, filling the page. And looking it over, it finally felt right.
“Blaire, Aimee called up and said Lucas and Donnie are downstairs,” Gram said as she stepped into the doorway of my bedroom, eyes immediately drawing over to where I sat at my desk. And then to the paper in front of me. “How’s draft number three going?”
I reached out and traced my signature. “I think it needs one more revision. I finally figured out how to say everything, but it could be polished a bit better.”
The floorboards creaked as Gram stepped further into my room, coming to rest her hand on my shoulder. “Do you mind if I stick mine in with yours when you send it?”
Gram had written a letter of her own to Dad, but neither of us had told the other of the contents. She’d written about her personal feelings and I’d written about mine, and only Dad would get to know them. We’d made that decision after I’d let Gram read the first draft of my letter, and she hadn’t been sure if I should’ve called Dad a butt—or, you know, a not-so-polite synonym for butt.
“Sounds perfect to me,” I said, pushing to my feet to wrap my arms around her. She was so much shorter than me, so much daintier, and I couldn’t help but smile. “I’ll see you tonight.”
Gram gave me a squeeze before she released me. “Have fun. Tell Lucas again how much I appreciated his help cleaning up Saturday night, will you?”
Lucas had stayed late after the Bash a week ago, cleaning up the booth with us—and then cleaning up the disaster area of a kitchen we’d left at the shop. He’d had no problem stepping back into his role as a helper at Costume Catering, hauling things back and forth, and even lending a hand to Aunt Aimee to wash dishes. It wasn’t the way I’d wanted us to spend our first night together as a couple again—it would’ve involved much more alone time—but it was still good to see him around my family.
It was good to have him around.
“I will,” I promised her, and headed out.
Aunt Aimee sat at the front counter of the shop with a large planner opened in front of her, murmuring slightly under her breath.
“Planning our next outing?” I asked as I came out of the stairwell. “Any more costume parties?”
“Those are dying off.” She tapped her pen against a blank section of the planner. “We’re going into the holiday season, so everyone’s going to want us to wear our normal catering uniforms. Make sure your black pants fit, okay?”
“As soon as I get back, I’ll try them on.” I glanced around the room. “The boys are—”
“Outside.” Aunt Aimee shook her head with a fond smile. “How you managed to convince Donnie to go on a walk, I have no clue. I’m never able to convince him to go with John and me.”
I patted her on the shoulder before walking around the side of the desk. “That’s because he’d rather walk with his cool friends than his lame parents.”
Aunt Aimee gave a loud gasp, but I slipped safely out of reach when she tried to reach out and smack me.
The door chimed and I hauled it opened and hurried outside, not putting it past Aunt Aimee to throw her pen in my direction. I could feel my smile, wide on my face, as I stepped out onto the sidewalk, and it only deepened when I turned and saw two figures leaning up against the building.
Donnie leaned against the shop’s wall, blue coffee cup in his hand, but straightened when he saw me. “Huh. I didn’t realize how long it’s been since I’ve seen you smile like that.”
“I’m in a pretty good mood,” I told him, my gaze shifting to the boy to his right
Looking at Lucas gave my heart race, even though it hadn’t even been a full day since I’d seen him. No, I’d seen him last night, when we’d taken Delia to the movie theater over in Bayview. He wore the black jacket he always wore, even though soon he’d have to break out a warmer coat. Cooler temperatures descended fast, but even slightly underdressed, he still was stunningly handsome, enough to make my brain hurt.
He still was propped up against the brick building, both hands holding the signature Crushed Beanz coffee cups, looking at me with an expression so warm it could’ve chased the cold air away.
I didn’t even realize we’d stood there, staring at each other, until Donnie groaned. “You know, I was starting to get used to you two not making me gag all the time. Seriously.”