Some alone time was what I needed, and although I missed Ezra, I didn’t call him.
It was all my fault, and I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about all the consequences he would get because of me. I was just an underage girl who let her teacher get too close, and just like Benji, any other adult would point at Ezra and say that he was the one who took advantage of me.
He didn’t. If anything, I was the one to urge him into letting me get closer. But what was I supposed to do when my love for him grew stronger each day? I couldn’t stay away.
I was sitting on the steps of the old carousel, staring blankly ahead. It was almost lunch time, and Benji wanted us to meet him at two. I still had a little bit of time left before I had to face him and my mothers, and this was the only place I wanted to be for now.
My phone vibrated in my backpack, and I thought about just letting it ring. I didn’t want to talk to anyone unless it was Ezra.
Luckily, it was him.
I stared at the screen for a second, then took a deep breath and tapped the green button with my thumb.
“Juno?” I heard his voice through the phone, and after lifting it up to my ear, an uncontrolled sob left my throat.
“I’m so sorry,” I cried. That seemed to be the only thing I was able to say to him at the moment. My heart was beating fast in my chest, and I had to close my eyes to focus on him.
“I don’t want you to apologize for this, Juno,” his voice was calm, and I couldn’t help but notice the cars passing by in the background.
“Where are you?” Panic rose inside of me. I brushed the tears off my cheeks, scared to hear his answer.
He sighed. “I’m on my way to Ontario. I can’t stay any longer. Benji kicked me out.”
I couldn’t find words, so I stayed quiet and hoped he would say something that would keep my hopes up of ever seeing him again.
“I know this is hard for you, Juno, but I want you to know that I’m not giving up on you.”
“So you’re just leaving me behind?” I croaked, feeling more anger than pain now.
“I have to. We can’t be together. Not right now, but when October starts, I will be waiting for you on the island. I love you, Juno, but it’s best if we keep our distance for now.”
He tried to sound all tough, but his shaky voice was enough for me to know that he was on the verge of crying.
“I don’t think I can wait that long, Ezra. I wanna come with you.”
“You need to complete your finals and then start college after the summer. It’s not going to be easy, but if you love me like I love you, we’ll meet again when October starts.”
His words hurt just as much as they gave me strength. He still wanted me, even if he lost his job. This town was his home, and I ripped it away from him because of a stupid mistake I made.
I was the reason why he was gone. I deserved to feel like this.
“You’re on the island, hm?” he asked softly. “I figured you’d be there.”
“I miss you. I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“Don’t,” he sighed, and I knew he was running his hand though his thick, wavy hair. “I love you, and I’ll wait for you. Don’t forget about me, Juno.”
“Never,” I sobbed, and that was the last word I said to him before he hung up the phone.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Juno
“This is serious, Juniper. I need you to sit up right and look me in the eyes when I’m talking to you.” Benji has never been this serious, and I hated it.
I crossed my arms and sat up straight, then looked over at Benji who was sitting across from me in a chair. I sat on one of the couches in Ezra’s classroom, and both my mothers were on my right, looking as disappointed and worried as ever.
“I need you to be honest with me. Only then I can report the truth to the police. He’s gone now, so you can stop feeling pressured by him.”
His words made me so fucking angry, and I wanted to throw the couch I was sitting on at him. “He never pressured me to do anything,” I muttered. This was unreal. Ezra had already been kicked out, and was probably going to lose his teaching license, but he didn’t deserve any more than that. Hell, he did not deserve any of it.
“Juni,” Aggie said quietly. “Why haven’t you talked to us about it? We could’ve gotten you out of whatever he pulled you into. I feel sorry for what he did to you.”
“You’re not even listening to what I’m saying! He didn’t do anything I didn’t want him to! Hell, I even started it,” I exclaimed.
“I think she’s a little confused at the moment,” Mom told Benji quietly.
I couldn’t explain the lump of frustration I had inside of me. They didn’t understand, and no matter how often I’d tell them that he wasn’t the bad guy, they wouldn’t believe me.
“Juno, it’s not okay for a teacher to take advantage of a student like that. Has he ever bribed you with, I don’t know…better grades? Or money?” Benji asked.
“Don’t be fucking ridiculous,” I muttered, and Mom gave me a serious look.
“Watch your words, young lady.”
“He never bribed me,” I told them, but they didn’t seem to believe that either.
“I never noticed something going on between your daughter and Ezra,” Benji said to Mom and Aggie. “I was actually friends with him until yesterday, and he always was a kind and good friend. Who knows how many students he has done this with?”
That was it. I had enough of them acting like they didn’t hear what I was saying. Their minds were set on Ezra being at fault here, when I was the one who couldn’t hold back on falling in love with my teacher.
“He’s not done it before.” I looked at Benji, then at Mom and Aggie. “You have to believe me. We’re in love, and I don’t think it’s fair that you guys judge who I’m in love with after all those years you struggled to get even a little bit of respect and validation from others.”
I didn’t care if my words hurt, but they were the truth. And if they kept ignoring me and acting like I was brainwashed, that’s what they’d get.
Mom was angry. Aggie, on the other hand, seemed to be thinking about what I was saying for the first time today.
“If you don’t tell me what happened between you and Ezra, there’s not much left to do. He’s gone anyway, the only thing to think about is if you wanna press charges against him,” Benji said, looking at my mothers.
“Yes,” Mom replied with no hesitation, but Aggie shook her head.
“I think we should talk to Juniper about it first. This is about her, not us.” She surprised me with those words, and suddenly, I felt a spark of hope and joy in my chest.
“Aggie, her teacher has been grooming her since God knows how long. He must’ve already tried to get her to do things she didn’t want to. I don’t think we have to question if we want to press charges against him or not.”
“He didn’t groom me.” I stayed calm.
“Well, did he touch you inappropriately?”
“I wanted him to,” I said in a challenging voice.
“Daria, I think you’re said enough for today.” I had never seen Aggie like this. Normally, she was the quieter and more reserved one. “We don’t wanna press charges against Ezra. I’ll talk to Juno about it at home. He’s not around anymore anyway, and she’ll be taking her finals in two days. Let’s not make this even harder for her.”