Prologue
Do not be afraid to have chaos in your eyes and fire in your voice. After all, your soul is so much more beautiful when it is filled with storms.
~ Ariana
Boss
Two years and three months ago . . .
“Tala, you need to tell him. Look how far this has gotten,” Ricochet, my Sgt. at Arms tells me. He’s not only a main officer at my club, but one of my closest friends.
I shut my eyes for a moment, ready to repeat this until I’m going red in the face. “He doesn’t need to know a damn thing, Ricochet. He’s just going to take her from me and she’s the last . . . she’s the only family I have left. I can’t lose her.” I say, tears pooling in my eyes. Sure, while I might have a half-brother, he couldn’t give a rat’s ass about me. Our dad tried to get us on the same page before his passing, but his attempts weren’t successful.
“I’m not talkin’ about Stoney.” Ricochet mutters from the chair beside my hospital bed. Hell, he’s been here with me through everything, big or small. He’s my closest friend, if not my best friend.
Furrowing my brows together, I look at him and try to figure out what he’s saying. “What’re you talking about?”
He cranes his neck to the side and throws his hand up against his forehead in frustration. “Tala, c’mon, you aren’t a dumb lady. Cowboy thinks this baby is his.”
Cowboy, the Prez of my Calgary, Canada charter. He and I have a rendezvous every now and again when the moment strikes.
“I don’t know why he’d think that.” I say nonchalantly.
Ricochet shoots me a dirty look, “Maybe because you haven’t told him she isn’t. We both know who Destiny’s father is.”
“There’s no need to remind me of that.” I bark, glaring at him from my bed. For fuck’s sake, I had a twenty-six-hour labor and he wants to bring up this shit right now.
“Since you brought it up, don’t you think he should be here?” I’m certain he’s talking about Stoney.
What a fucking question. “No. We had a one-night stand. Nothing more. Nothing less. He wasn’t signing up to create a child with me and we both know it.”
Ricochet stares into my eyes, shaking his head in disapproval. “He’s not a bad man, Tala. I mean fuck, he’s a pretty solid dude. He’d be a great father to her.”
The mere thought of having Stoney around her terrifies me more than I can express. He wouldn’t be okay with living in Virginia while we’re in New York. I know that for a fact. He’s far too bullheaded to do something like that. Instead, he’d take her away out of spite. He’d rip her straight out of my arms and never let her around me because he’d dub me a horrible mother.
Shaking my head, the tears fall before I can stop them. “I can’t lose her, Ricochet. I can’t fucking lose her. She’s all I have and . . . and if this means I’m a horrible person then I guess I am, but I can’t lose something as precious as my daughter.”
Ricochet grabs my hand and holds on tight. “Alright, I won’t bring it up again. I promise.” His dark chocolate eyes stare right into mine.
I nod while gnawing on my bottom lip, looking over at the small crib beside my bed. She was born with a full head of hair, dark as obsidian just like my own, while her eyes remind me of her father’s. They’re practically carbon copies of his, a deep brown with a flash of an amber color just around her irises.
We might have just met a couple hours ago, but I already know I’ll do anything to protect her, to keep her safe from everything, even if it means keeping someone away from her who I’m sure would be a good father. But I know Stoney, and I know he’d demand we leave our life here and move to Stonewall Mills.
I’m President of the Iron Vex MC and I can’t do that. I refuse to give up the legacy my family built to go play an ol’ lady slash baby momma. He’d be the type to do right by me, and her, so I know he’d want to lock me down. It wouldn’t matter that we don’t get along. In his eyes it would only be about respecting his daughter’s mother.
I wouldn’t even have a say.
Chapter One
I wish I could hurt you the way you hurt me, but I know that if I had the chance, I wouldn’t do it
~ Quotes Life
Cowboy
Two years ago . . .
“Are we supposed to get a cake or something?” Faith questions. She’s one of the clubwhores up here at Boss’ charter in Queens, but she acts more like a bartender than a clubwhore. Her and Iris actually. The club really has a soft spot for them from the stories I’ve heard. A couple years ago they were on their way up here to New York to start college. Got scammed, needed a place to live and Boss gave ‘em both a job as long as they worked the bar a few nights a week. They make enough in tips to have a decent apartment in Queens, but these two won’t ever leave if you ask me. They’re part of the club now, viewin’ everyone as family and everything.
“No. She’s three months old. She can’t even eat cake!” Iris replies back, rolling her eyes.
“These two bitches really talking about getting a baby a three-month-old birthday cake?” Gold questions with raised brows.
Chuckles, who’s her ol’ man, nods. “Looks that way, darlin’.”
I’ve been sittin’ at a table with these two for about an hour now, waitin’ for Boss to come in. I know she had some shit to be handling, some sort of phone call with Stoney or something if I correctly recall.
“She can only have Boss’ tit, ladies.” Gold calls over to Iris and Faith.
They both narrow their eyes in at her, “Eavesdropper much?”
“She doesn’t need a birthday until she’s one, and you know if you try to do something before then Boss will get ticked.”
“Oh, come on. Can’t we have some sort of party?” Faith whines, puffing out her lip.
Before Gold can respond, Iris is speaking up. “Yeah, she didn’t even let us throw her a baby shower!”
Goodness, these two southern women really love to spoil people around them. Lord knows they mean well, but sometimes they can be a bit over the top.
“Too bad, so sad. Grow up and get over it. Boss didn’t want a baby shower, so she didn’t have one. Destiny doesn’t need a three-month-old birthday party. If you two are itching to have a party here, you can throw Chuckles’ birthday bash. I hate planning that type of shit.”
“Yes!” Faith jumps up and down. “We can go to the old medical supply store a few blocks over and grab some walkers, adult diapers—”
“Whoa?! What in the actual fuck?!” Chuckles stands up so fast his chair scrapes against the floor, throwing his hands up in the air.
Meanwhile, his ol’ lady is getting a good laugh out of this.
Out of nowhere the sound of glass shattering comes from behind the wall. I furrow my brows and everyone diverts their eyes in the same area. Obviously, I’m not the only person who heard it.
I rise from my chair and head over to the doorway that leads out into the hallway. It takes anyone to a variety of areas which include Boss’ office, the lounge, or the kitchen. It sounded like it came from Boss’ office, so I head over there first.