I’ve argued with gangbangers, threatened families, paid off the good guys to turn a blind eye to the bad guys. I’ve cut off fingers, shot kneecaps to pieces, and been held at gunpoint. All of it done in the name of the family. Done because it’s expected. Done because my father didn’t leave me a choice.
Tonight, I’m about to cross a line I swore I never would.
I’m going to kill a man.
“You see, Drake, you’ve put me in a tough spot. You know why that is?” I ask the guy tied to a chair in the basement of the club.
He’s shaking and fighting to get free, but he knows what’s ahead for him. “N-no,” he stutters.
“You were one of my top guys. I thought I could trust you. But you stole from me. Not only that, but you stole and then gave it to my enemy.” With the gun in my hand, I backhand him across the face, making blood spray through the room. Kneeling in front of him, I get on his level. “How long have you been working both sides, Drake?”
“A couple months. Not long, I swear, Sonny.” He tries to get me to listen. To reason.
“I know you took drugs. What else did you take to him?”
“He-he wanted information. He li-likes girls.”
Cocking my head to the side, I look at him. “He wants my club girls?”
Nodding his head, he begins to tell me more. “The DeBrava family started running girls. He wants blondes. S-says they sell better. The drugs were mostly for their girls.”
“Let me get this straight. You were skimming off the top of my bricks to give to DeBrava so he could drug girls. And to top it off, he wants my girls—blonde ones—who work for me for an honest wage. Am I missing anything?”
“I didn’t give him any—” Before he can finish his sentence, I take a blade from the man next to me and saw at his hand.
“Those who steal, lose a hand. You shouldn’t take from the hand that feeds you, Drake.” Blood pools from his arm to the floor as his screams fill the room as I sever his hand from his body. “You crossed the wrong man.” I toss the blade aside, and lifting my gun, I point at Drake. He begs me for his life, and for a split second I think about it, but I know I can’t. Not now. Lifting my chin, I point the barrel of my gun at his head and shoot.
The room goes quiet after the loud bang, falling silent with the life I took. Instantly, I feel like I’m going to be sick. “Clean this up,” I order my men. “Finish removing his hand and send it to DeBrava. He needs to know he won’t be stealing from us anymore.”
I barely make it to my office before I puke in a trash can, emptying the entire contents of my stomach. Heading to the restroom, I go to the sink to wash out my mouth, but when my hand goes under the water, it runs red. I look to see blood coating my hands, sprayed across my face, staining my white shirt. I rip the shirt from my body and begin to scrub my hands clean and then my face. It feels like hours before the water no longer runs red.
Looking up into the mirror, I stare at my reflection, not recognizing myself anymore. Dark, dead eyes look back at me, and I can’t stand the sight. Dropping my chin to my chest, I punch the mirror, making it crack into a web of lines.
Walking back to my office, I put on clean clothes and leave. I need to get out of here. I need to go home. I need to see Ruby. Feel her. Know that she still sees me under everything I’ve become.
When I arrive home, I look for her in a few places before finding her outside floating on a large raft that takes up almost half the kidney-shaped pool. Sunglasses cover her blue eyes, but her red bikini doesn’t cover much of her body that glistens from sun.
Dez is lying on a lounger next to the pool with his face in his phone. Hearing me walk out, he gives me a head nod in acknowledgement. “Little hot to be out here in a three-piece suit, ain’t it?” he jokes.
“Sonny? You’re home early. Everything alright?” Ruby asks, pushing her sunglasses to the top of her head and sitting up on her float.
“Can’t a man come home to surprise his girl?” I ask with a grin as I remove my jacket.
Her smile melts me as she says, “Of course you can.”
Stepping out of my shoes and taking off my vest and shirt, I contemplate my pants and decide to fuck it and pull them off too.
“What are you doing?” she squeals when I walk to the edge of the pool in just my boxers.
“Going for a swim,” I say before diving in, swimming under her giant float. When I pop out of the water, I’m at her feet. Grabbing her ankle, I meet her eye. “Boo,” I say before pulling until she screams and falls into the water with me.
She comes out of the water gasping for air and yelling, looking like a floundering fish. I can’t help but laugh. “You are going to get it,” she threatens before going under again. She tries to drag me with her, but I’m too fast, grabbing her in my arms and pulling her up to face me.
“Hi,” I say, smiling at her.
Her defense goes down as she looks at me. “Hi.”
Crashing my mouth to hers, I kiss her like it’s my last breath. I need a taste, a fix, of her. My tongue sweeps inside her mouth, savoring every part. Moaning into my mouth, she gives as good as she takes, fulfilling a craving we’ve gone without for too long.
“I missed you,” I tell her, nipping at her lips.
“I’ve been right here.”
Pressing my forehead to hers, I close my eyes and concentrate on the feeling of her heart beating against my chest. “I’m sorry,” I whisper before letting go and swimming to the edge. Lifting myself out of the pool, I walk to find a towel.
“Where are you going?” she asks, sounding frustrated, smacking the water.
“Work.” I look back at her. “I’ll be late. Don’t wait up.”
“Sonny!” she yells at my retreating back. But I don’t stop or dare look at her again. Instead, I walk away and back to the shadow of darkness I live under.
Passing by Dez, I hear him mutter, “Fuckin’ coward.” All I can do is nod because he’s not wrong.
19
Ruby
“I don’t know what to do,” I cry into Desmond’s chest as he holds me.
After Sonny came and went like a thief in the night, taking a piece of hope and love I’d been waiting for, I’ve been a mess.
Dez jumped into the pool and tried to get me to play around, but I couldn’t. When I crumbled and started to cry, he carried me out of the pool, setting me on his lap and wrapping a towel around me.
We haven’t moved from this spot for a while, and now the sun is going down. I shiver against him as I lie with my cheek to his chest, his arms lazily around me. It’s comforting but also makes me mad because it should be Sonny who should be lying here with me.
“You’re cold. Let’s get you inside and warmed up,” he tells me, moving to get up.
“No.” I look up at him. “Just a little longer? Please?”
He bends and presses a kiss to my forehead. It feels so familiar and so much like the ones Sonny used to leave there. Searing me, making me want so much more from him. Now, it’s Desmond’s lips on my skin, fulfilling the need I have to feel loved and comforted.