Oh well. She wasn’t going to change. That just felt too weird.
When she walked out of the bedroom, she heard the click clack of nails in the kitchen. She came around the corner and found Josh with a mouthful of chocolate chip cookie. “Hey, those aren’t cool yet.”
He finished chewing and swallowed. “They’re cool enough for me.”
Audrey rolled her eyes. He was always so impatient when it came to her baked goods. That sounded like a euphemism but unfortunately it wasn’t. She wished it was. He didn’t seem at all as ravenous for her as he was for her cookies. Her literal cookies.
She went to the cupboard and pulled out a glass. Josh loved milk with chocolate chip cookies and brownies. When she made cupcakes, he drank water. And with oatmeal raisin cookies he preferred soda for some odd reason.
After filling the glass to the top, she handed it to him and he drank it halfway down. The two worked together to fill the plate with the baked treats and went back into the front room.
“How’s Nonna?” she asked knowing that he’d had dinner with her since it was Sunday, as they walked to the front room and sank into the sofa.
“As ornery as ever.” Josh picked up the remote and turned the TV on.
“Still no progress in getting her to move into Golden Years?” She’d thought that Josh would have been able to wear her down by now, but that woman was as stubborn as they came.
He opened his mouth to say something but then closed it.
“What?” she asked thinking maybe there had been some movement on that front.
“Nothing.”
Audrey felt like it was something, but she dropped it. If he wanted to talk about it with her, he would have, if not, she didn’t want to pressure him.
They easily fell into their routine. They watched the movie and chatted. When the talk turned to Ava’s wedding, Audrey almost asked him to be her plus one, but she chickened out. They’d been each other’s plus one on several occasions, but that was before they’d had sex.
At the bridal salon she’d been so amped up to take control of her life. To stop being quiet and say what she felt. To find out would it be yes or would it be sorry. But now that she and Josh were together her old fear started creeping up. She didn’t want to do anything that would ruin their friendship or make things awkward between them.
She was internally battling with that conundrum as the movie credits began to roll. At the same time, they both looked down and saw that there was one cookie left. She glanced up at him and he said, “Quick draw?”
She nodded and assumed the position. They both sat on the edge of the couch with their hands on their knees and counted back from three.
They chorused, “Three, two, one.”
Her hand flew down to the plate and she felt the cookie beneath her fingertips.
“Yes!” she whooped in victory when she felt his hand cover hers. He pulled his hand back, and she didn’t let go of the cookie. He had much longer arms than she did, and when he lifted his hand above his head she ended up on his lap to keep a hold of it.
One minute they were both laughing as they wrestled for the cookie and the next they were face to face and she was straddling his lap. Their laughter died down and Josh lowered his arm. The hand that wasn’t holding the cookie was on her hip.
The energy between them crackled with electricity. It was so thick she felt like she could cut it with a knife. She was scared to move, to breathe, to do anything that would ruin this moment, but…she was also scared to do nothing and allow the moment to pass.
23
“Audrey…” His tone held a warning, he just wasn’t sure if he was warning himself or her.
“What?” she asked, her mouth barely an inch from his.
Josh had barely been able to resist Audrey before they’d shared a night together, now he had no chance. He’d tried to convince himself that if he could just come over here and be friends with her, everything would be back to normal. But now he knew, there was no normal now that they’d crossed that line.
Her innocent seduction was too potent. His feelings for her were too intense. Their chemistry was too explosive to deny.
How could he ever be alone with her and not want to tear her clothes off. He’d wanted to before, but now he’d tasted the forbidden fruit. He knew how soft her lips were and the soft sounds of pleasure she made when he was driving into her.
“We can’t…I don’t want to, I can’t lose you.” He voiced his greatest fear aloud.
In that moment he knew the deepest, darkest reason that he’d never allowed himself to act on what he felt for Audrey. His psychologist had repeatedly told him that he had commitment and abandonment issues, but he’d basically written those comments off. He figured that was what every shrink said to their patients. Like a blanket statement to cover all sins.
But now he was thinking that Dr. Lowe might just have been right about it.
She lifted her hand to his face and cupped his cheek as she shook her head. “You won’t. I promise. You won’t lose me.”
He didn’t know if she was just saying that because she wanted to be with him tonight or if she really, truly meant it. He hoped it was the latter.
She began to move off his lap. “But we don’t have to—”
His fingers tightened on her hips keeping her in place. He knew that he was sending her mixed signals, but his mind was all fucked up. He was fucked up.
She stilled and lifted her hands to his shoulders. She ran her fingers down his arm and back up again. She traced a tattoo on his neck with her fingertips. The gentle brush of her touch caused his arousal to spike. “Is this okay?”
“Anything you do is okay.” His chest rose and fell in shallow breaths as his fingers clenched on her hips causing them to roll and press her core into his straining erection sending a surge of arousal to course through him. He closed his eyes as his head fell back against the couch.
As soon as his neck bent back, Audrey took the opportunity to lean forward and press a feather soft kiss to his neck. His jaw clenched as he inhaled sharply through his nose. For years, he’d had trouble feeling anything sexually. But when he was with Audrey, the slightest touch sent him plummeting toward the edge of completion.
She peppered kisses along his neck as her hands gripped his shoulders and her hips continued to roll seductively as she ground her sex against his rock-hard shaft. He hadn’t dry humped since middle school, and he forgot how frustrating it was. He wanted more.
A deep growl rumbled from his chest as he flipped her over so that she was beneath him lying on the couch. He leaned down and covered her mouth with his taking what he wanted, what he needed. His tongue pushed past the barriers of her lips, sweeping into her mouth. Her tongue met his in a seductive dance.
Her arms snaked around his neck and her legs spread wider as she wrapped them around his waist. Even through the barriers of her sweats and his jeans, he could feel the heat of her sex. He broke their kiss and began trailing kisses down her neck as his hand slid beneath her T-shirt. His fingers grazed her ribs before he cupped her breast in his hand.
She arched her back as a soft moan vibrated through her. He teased her nipples, rolling them between his finger and thumb, pinching them lightly as he lavished kisses on her neck. Her body writhed beneath him restlessly, seeking more contact.