I bite the inside of my cheek as I look down at her. I don’t bring up the obvious consequences of what we did, and neither does she. We both know what could happen, but I don’t think she’s ready for me to tell her that the sight of watching her belly grow with my child is something I’m eventually going to want.
Just imagining how heavy her tits would be, filled with the nourishment for our child, makes me groan, and my cock begins to thicken again.
“Do you hate messy?” I ask, a half-assed attempt at distracting my dick.
“I don’t want to sleep in a wet spot,” she says, and her eyes grow bright and full of the same emotion I saw on her pretty face when she first climbed out of the cab earlier.
Unable to go a second longer without knowing for sure, I curl my finger under her chin so I can fully look in her eyes. “Are we okay?”
“I’m perfect,” she answers. “It was amazing.”
She slides past me to climb back in the bed, and I take the opportunity to piss and wash up a little before joining her under the covers.
Amazing.
My sentiments exactly. Being with her was phenomenal, better than I could’ve ever imagined.
I don’t waste a second pulling her to my chest when I climb back in the bed. She didn’t bother with clothes, so neither do I.
My body still yearns for her, my cock taking notice of her naked flesh against my own, but I ignore it. I know one time won’t be enough, but the ball is in her court, and it will be so long as I even think there’s a chance she isn’t ready for all I have to offer. My needs are secondary to hers, and they always will be. I want to shower her with every affection I was never able to show any woman prior to her.
She releases a breathy sigh of contentment, the warmth skating over my chest, and I hold her tighter.
“No regrets?” I ask because I’m dying to know. She isn’t showing any outward signs of being upset over what we did, but I have to make sure.
“None whatsoever,” she says, and I feel her lips pull into a smile.
My heart is absolutely full, brimming to the top and overflowing. It should make me feel like a pussy, like a silly sap for being content with holding her, but those emotions don’t even touch me.
“No guilt?”
She’s not as quick to respond this time, and the silence says more than words ever could.
I press my lips to the top of her head. “Please, never feel guilty for doing what you want, for taking pleasure, for enjoying something that was once used against you as a weapon.”
Her hot tears roll down my side, and as much as I want to lift her off me to stare in her eyes and repeat those words until she believes them, I just hold her even tighter.
“You may have to remind me of this sometimes.”
“Every day for the rest of your life,” I vow. “You’re precious, Mia. A gift I’ve always needed and never thought to ask for.”
“I could say the same about you.”
My hand works up her spine and back down again, the action familiar and soothing to both of us. Tonight was a big step, and one I hope happens again very soon, but I’d be a fool to think that she’s healed completely. There will be setbacks and days when she can’t see past the grief and anger. Days when it’ll take everything I have to keep reminding her that she’s amazing and perfect, not in spite of what happened to her but because it did.
Not many women could come out on the other side with hopes and dreams and goals to work toward, but I have this feeling deep inside of me that Mia Vazquez is going to surprise every single one of us. Her abduction might have broken her, but she’s still a force that will overcome and conquer. Hell, she’s already turned my rugged ass into a love-sick fool, a man dependent on her touch.
“I hope my brother and Jasmine didn’t hear what we did.”
Max’s room is on one side of mine and Mia’s on the other. A wicked grin crosses my lips.
“It would only be payback,” I mutter. “You wouldn’t believe the shit I’ve had to listen to the last couple of weeks.”
She huffs a laugh against my chest.
“I never knew how fucking bossy Tug was until a few nights ago. He commanded them like a general even while being in South America.”
“South America?”
“That’s where the guys are right now, but you’d think he was in the same room with them rather than thousands of miles away. His voice echoes through the walls as he got very specific on what you’re damn brother needed to do to their woman.”
I won’t tell her that it turned me on. I still feel a little guilty for lying in bed and taking care of how my body responded to the way Tug told Max exactly how Jasmine’s pussy should be treated.
And now I’m getting hard again. Damn it.
“Doesn’t surprise me,” Mia whispers. “They were so loud when they were in high school. My headphones were practically glued to my ears to try and drown out their noises.”
“Well, turnabouts fair play, I guess.”
“I need to talk to him.” I know she’s talking about Max.
Her brother has tried numerous times to comfort her, but I think she’s holding onto a grudge for him faking his own death all those years ago. It would hurt anyone, but after what she went through, I think it hit her even harder.
“I think he’s ready for that conversation,” I tell her.
I tilt her chin up and press my lips to hers, but it isn’t a prequel to anything but a goodnight.
“Sleep, Sweet Mia. It’s been a long day.”
She grins against my lips before dropping her head back to my chest and sinking down further on the mattress.
Yep, this is heaven.
Chapter 34
Mia
Before I even open my eyes, I know Ryan is gone.
The same fear that engulfed me after he left me alone when they got back from Venezuela threatens to rear its ugly head again, but I shove it down and take stock of my surroundings.
His leather cut, the one he never leaves the clubhouse without is still tossed over the back of the chair in the corner. His boots are to the side of the TV stand, and the sound of water can be heard from the bathroom.
He hasn’t left at all, and I feel foolish for thinking he would after last night.
Even though he isn’t gone, I still question whether or not I should join him in the shower, but my body begs for warm water and a good scrubbing. I cleaned up as best I could last night, but the pull of him was stronger than the urge to bathe, and it finally forced me out of the bathroom and into his arms.
Telling myself to get out of my head, I climb out of bed and go to him. At first sight, I think something is wrong. His head is dropped low as the water shoots between his shoulder blades, and I immediately realize how easy it is to see him through the opaque shower curtain. We spent the better part of a week with him standing guard, with his back turned while I showered. At any given second he could’ve looked over his shoulder and gotten an eye full, but even though I didn’t always focus on him to make sure he kept his distance, I know deep in my soul that he never once tried to get a glimpse of me before I was willing to give it to him.
Ryan Gabhart is an honorable man, and I’m not fool enough to let him go anytime soon.