I stood and grabbed a shoebox from my bookshelf. Heading to the living room, I placed the box on the coffee table in front of the couch and sat down. I opened the lid, staring at the Polaroids inside. Carter always loved physical pictures. While I preferred to take photos on my phone, Carter took his camera everywhere. He was unique like that.
The first picture I picked up was of us, cuddled on this very couch. I’d been watching television, eating a slice of pizza, when he’d snuggled up against me, the camera outstretched in one hand. “Say cheese, hot stuff.” I’d looked at the lens, smiled with a piece of pizza half in my mouth. I looked like an idiot, but one could never be ready for when Carter wanted a picture.
The memories made me laugh as I flipped through the stack. I don’t know how long I sat there perusing the pictures, taking my time to remember when each one was taken. A lot of them had Shane in them too, including one of when he first moved in. That desperate, sad sheen in his eyes had nearly broken mine and Carter’s hearts. He’d wanted to be loved by his parents, only to be rejected instead.
“West?” Shane’s gentle voice startled me, and I glanced over my shoulder. He stood in the entranceway, gaze roaming over the photos I had scattered on the coffee table. “Are those Carter’s?”
I stood and walked around the couch, kissing him on the lips when I reached him. “Hey. What are you doing home?”
“It’s not very busy. The big store manager, Shirley, sent me and David home. David gave me a ride.” He wrapped his arms around my neck and slanted his mouth over mine. We stood there for about five minutes, kissing, until he pulled away. “What are you doing?”
“Remembering,” I answered honestly. I slid my hand in his and tugged him around to the couch. We both sat down and stared at the photos. “Carter loved his Polaroid camera.”
“What happened to it?”
“It’s in my closet in the bedroom.”
“I’m glad you didn’t sell it.” Shane pressed against my side, and I wrapped my arm around his shoulder. “He took it everywhere with him.”
Shane reached over and grabbed one of the photos, staring at a picture of himself and me. We were playing on an air hockey table at the arcade. Shane had a look of concentration on his face, eyes narrowed and tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth. I had my back to the camera, so we couldn’t see my face.
“You have such a nice ass, Daddy,” Shane whispered, glancing at me.
“Is it my prettiest feature?” I teased.
He grinned. “Your dick is just as nice. I like it a lot.”
I stroked his chin. “I’m glad you think so, but before we get carried away, we need to talk about all of this first.”
He nodded. “I know. What did you want to talk about?”
Dragging him into my lap, I pecked his lips. “Carter.”
Shane swallowed and he dropped his gaze. “Oh.”
“We’ve been avoiding the topic for a long time now, Boy, and we need to talk about him. It’s what’s… been holding us back from something more serious.” I rubbed his thigh through his jeans. “I miss him every day. Sometimes I imagine he’s talking to me, telling me things.”
“Really?” He cocked his head. “What does he say?”
“That it’s okay to feel the way I do about you.” I smiled. “And I trust his opinion. He’s a smart guy.”
Shane laughed. “Yeah, he was.” The expression on his face turned serious. “I don’t want him to hate me.”
“He’d never hate you,” I whispered.
“Wouldn’t he?” He stared at me with wide eyes. “I’m sleeping with his man.”
“You know Carter, he’s all about a happy sex life.”
“But this is different.”
“It’s not,” I argued. Maybe the fake conversation with Carter helped, but I felt more sure about this thing with Shane now. “He asked me to take care of you, Shane. In the end, he wanted us both to be happy.”
“And if that happiness is with you, that’s okay?” He pressed his forehead against mine.
“Yes, because I’m happy with you too, and I want to be your boyfriend.”
He leaned back, grinning so big it nearly broke his face. “You do?”
“Yes, but it comes with conditions.”
Shane scrambled around until his knees were on either side of my thighs, pressing into the couch beside me. He drove his hips forward and his hard cock rubbed up against mine, making me dizzy for a second with how quickly my blood rushed south. “What conditions?”
To stop him from shoving his cock against me again, I clutched at his hips. I couldn’t think when I was horny and ready to fuck him over the back of this couch. “I can’t be your only friend, Shane. You need to make friends your own age.”
He frowned and stuck out his tongue, and then nodded. “I can do that.”
“Not that idiot who used you,” I said sternly.
“Yeah, not him.”
“Next, you won’t kill yourself with school this year. I want you to take care of yourself.”
He licked his lips. “I was thinking about classes, and I decided on my major.”
“Yeah?” I kissed his chin. “What do you want to do?”
Shane smiled. “Psychology.”
My heart ached, and I couldn’t help the grin that curved at my mouth. “Carter would be proud.”
“He’s the reason I wanted to do it. I want to help people, West. At first, I wasn’t sure that was it for me, but I think it is.”
“You’d be amazing at it,” I said. “Which brings me to my next condition. I want you to see a therapist.”
Shane sat back, nose crinkled in confusion. “What? Why?”
“Because you’re not handling Carter’s death.” I held up my hand before he could argue. “And neither am I, so I’m going to get someone too. We both need it. Think about it, it would help, and you’d get firsthand experience on how psychologists work.”
He hesitated and then sighed. “All right. I’ll go see someone.”
“Good.” I gripped at his hips harder and grabbed the back of his neck, dragging him down for a hard kiss that made my own toes curl. “Shane Pegoraro, will you be my boyfriend?”
“Yes!” He slammed his lips against mine again, and I kissed him back, holding him tighter. We dry fucked against each other. Pleasure and need zinged through me, alighting my body with a fiery passion that made my skin hot. I wanted Shane over this couch, his ass in the air while he begged me to stuff him full.
“Tell me what you need, Boy,” I mumbled against his lips.
“You, Daddy, I need you. I want you in me.” He whimpered, throwing his head back when I worked my mouth against his neck.
“Want Daddy’s thick cock inside your tight little hole?”
“Yes, please! Please, Daddy!”
I grabbed him around the waist and lifted him against me when I stood and then dropped him on the couch. His body was pressed against the cushions, one leg thrown over the back. He looked delicious enough to eat. I unbuckled my belt. He nibbled on his bottom lip while I drew the leather out of my pants loops. When the belt was free, I drew it between my hands and snapped it so that a loud crack made him jump and moan. “Should I tie those hands up?” I teased.