I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t.
It didn’t take long, but when Jacob pulled up to Terry’s house, all the lights were off and it was locked up. He couldn’t be sure of course that Lucas wasn’t in there, but he got no answer to his repeated ringing of the doorbell, and he had just given up when an older woman came out of the house next door. “Is there something I can help you with?”
Jacob smiled. “I was hoping to find Lucas actually.”
The woman’s face cleared. “Oh, Terry’s away for the weekend, and he said Lucas was with friends. I said I’d keep an eye out…even though they’ve got a good security system,” she added.
Jacob nodded. She’d obviously thought twice about telling a stranger the house was empty, and he nodded his thanks and said he’d catch up with them next week. Now where?
The thought Lucas was outside in this weather scared the shit out of him, and even more that he was responsible made him feel decidedly queasy. Maybe he would go to the club? He didn’t think Lucas had any other relatives or even close friends because surely he wouldn’t have been stuck with Terry if that was the case. Jacob got back in his car and turned the heater up and decided to set off to the club.
If there hadn’t been a streetlight near the bus stop, he’d have missed him.
Hunched over and perched miserably on a bench, Lucas looked like he was waiting for a bus, but the snow was settling and Jacob doubted there would be one coming anytime soon. He slammed the brakes on just as he recognized Lucas and was out of the car before he even realized it.
“Lucas?”
Lucas looked up in surprise. “Jacob?”
“You’re freezing,” Jacob said unnecessarily. Lucas was shivering, and his goddamn lips were just about blue.
“I’m okay,” Lucas said defensively and hunched into his jacket.
‘Well, we can talk about that when you’re dry and warm,” Jacob said firmly and clasped Lucas’s arm. Lucas shrugged it off.
“I’m fine.”
Jacob sighed. How was he going to make this right? He hunched down in front of Lucas. “I owe you a huge apology. If you come home, I’d like to tell you what you saw and explain about Ben.”
Lucas’s eyes widened as if he hadn’t expected Jacob to mention him, but when Jacob clasped him a second time, Lucas didn’t resist.
Jacob got Lucas into the second jacket and without thinking leaned over to fasten his seat belt. Lucas made some sort of surprised noise in the back of his throat, but Jacob didn’t draw back. He was shivering, so Jacob took off his own jacket and draped it over Lucas’s knees.
“But that’s yours.”
Jacob nodded. “It’s warm enough in the car.”
They didn’t have far to go, and apart from glancing at Lucas to see if he was still shivering, Jacob stayed silent. Explanations were better done at home and in the warmth with a steaming mug of hot chocolate.
He steered Jacob through the kitchen and right to the stairs, and into his room. “Sit there a moment.”
Jacob walked into the bathroom and started the bath then double backed and got three large towels from the closet near his room. Lucas hadn’t moved, but he still didn’t look like he’d warmed up. Jacob added some bubble bath to the water and turned the faucet off, then came back to get Lucas. He hadn’t moved and just stared at him in bewilderment. Jacob eased his arms out of the damp jacket and then tugged him to the bathroom.
“I can manage.” But Lucas’s teeth were chattering, and his fingers were struggling with the buttons.
“Let me help,” Jacob asked gently. “I only want to make sure you get in okay, then I will leave you for a soak.”
Lucas nodded but didn’t meet Jacob’s eyes as Jacob helped him strip and held his hand to steady him as he climbed in. Lucas groaned as he sat in the water and leaned back, the bubbles covering him completely.
“I’m just going to make us a warm drink,” Jacob promised and hurried back downstairs to the kitchen. He heated the milk and blew out a long breath of relief. What would have happened to Lucas if Jacob hadn’t found him? He made two steaming mugs of hot chocolate and carried them upstairs. Lucas was lying in the bath, water up to his neck, and his eyes closed.
Jacob put Lucas’s cup on the small shelf next to the bath for holding soaps, and Lucas opened his eyes. “Thank you.”
Jacob took a sip while he gathered his thoughts, but he couldn’t let this go on any longer. “Ben was my husband. We’d only between together just two years when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It had spread already, and despite the chemo and everything else, he died after a year.”
“I’m sorry,” Lucas murmured, looking stricken.
“No,” Jacob said. “It’s I that owes you an apology. You know I’m a Dom, but what you don’t know is that I’m a Daddy Dom. Ben was my husband, but also my little.” He watched Lucas’s face for any sort of disgust, but he just looked concerned. “Did you go in the Parent/little room at the club?”
“No.” Lucas shook his head. “But I understand what a Daddy Dom is. My Dom friend explained a lot to me. I know what littles are, and I understood when I saw how Charlie behaved with his Sir.”
“When I came home from the funeral I was so angry. Everything I could see of Ben’s I packed up, but I couldn’t bear to go in our playroom, and just closed and locked the door. We had a lock on it for when Ben’s mom visited. I completely forgot about the bathroom.”
“I was looking for towels,” Lucas admitted, “but I should have shut the door immediately when I saw what it was, and I certainly shouldn’t have picked the rabbit up.”
“You like soft things though,” Jacob pointed out. “The elephant at the store.”
Lucas flushed. “I always did.”
“I moved to Atlanta a week after the funeral. I just couldn’t bear to be here, and I couldn’t stand the thought of emptying that room either, so renting the house out was impossible. I’ve been offered a job in England. Starts in April, but I’m thinking of going early and maybe doing some exploring.”
Lucas took another sip of his chocolate. “Would it be easier if I emptied everything after you’ve gone?” He flushed. “I mean, you could get Patrick or someone to check up on me. I would never—”
“I trust you,” Jacob interrupted. “To be honest, I’ve been considering exactly that. Ben died the week after New Year’s, and we had a pretty miserable Christmas. I’ve kind of avoided it every year.”
Because Christmas Eve Jacob had admitted defeat. Ben had been in so much pain, and even Isaac had suggested the hospice. But he felt like he had given up. Given up on Ben.
“But being in this house would make it all so much worse.” Tears shimmered in Lucas’s eyes, but for maybe the first time, Jacob’s were clear. He was more concerned he was upsetting Lucas.
“It’s not like I have to decide tomorrow.” Jacob finished his chocolate and stood up. Lucas drained his. “How are you feeling?”
“Much warmer, thank you,” Lucas assured him.
“Good,” Jacob said. He did look better. “Then get yourself dry, and I’ll go bring you your dinner in bed.”