“You knew it was him?” I gasp.
The look he gives me is part hurt, part mad, and all smug. “Seriously? You two were horrible at hiding your relationship.” He purses his lips and gives me a little sniff. “Truthfully though, it was the triplets of terror who figured it out first. But whatever, I had an inkling already anyway.” This damn diva.
“I’m sure the girls just loved that.” I mutter sarcastically while sipping some more wine.
Brad blinks at me questioningly. “Actually, they did.”
“What?”
He nods his head. “Everyone could tell how happy you two were. Disgustingly so.” I roll my eyes. “They were even picking out their bridesmaids gentlemen already.”
I scratch my head. “Don’t you mean bridesmaids dresses?” I question. I’m feeling good but I’m not drunk yet…I’m pretty sure that I’m not.
His lips quirk up at the side. “Those too. But there are a few very muscular hotties down at the gym that they planned on convincing you to make part of your wedding.” He chuckles.
“Over Danny’s dead body.” I laugh. “That man would never allow that.” I giggle. “I’m pretty sure that he still thinks that the girls are seven and not seventeen.”
“You know better than to doubt what those three are capable of. Hell, they’ll probably convince Danny that it was all his idea to set them up with those guys.”
I nod my head slowly. “Okay, I’ll give you that one. Those three are nothing but devious when they want to be.”
“Why would you think that they wouldn’t want you two together?” Brad asks genuinely.
I shrug. “Just something that I overheard before Danny and I even started dating.”
Meaning, I heard them talking about how no one was good enough for him and how they’re tired of all the women after him. Not going to lie, it sucked to overhear, but I got it. Danny is amazing.
Brad makes a noncommittal sound. “So, you ran for the hills when that damn hoochie came in and kissed him, am I correct?”
I glare at my best friend. “Why ask if you already know the answer.”
He raises his nose in the air. “I prefer not to assume things.”
“Since when?” That’s one of the things that his ass excels at.
He runs his tongue across his teeth. “I understand that you’re heartbroken and your vagina is upset that it’s a barren wasteland again, but there is no need to be so catty.”
“At least I’ve gotten some within the past year.” I mutter into my glass.
“What was that?” He hisses. “I couldn’t hear you.”
“Going deaf and getting fat, this year isn’t looking good for you.”
“I have been on my best behavior for months now. Trust me, you do not want the gloves to come off right now.”
“I’m kidding.” I give him a wide fake smile.
“Mmmhmm.” He looks me up and down. “Anyway, have you even tried to talk to him about it or did you just cut and run?”
I place my glass down onto the table and pull my knees up to my chest. “What’s the point?” I hold my hand up to stop him from saying anything. “Seriously, he has random women just coming up and tongue fucking his mouth. He has so many notches on his bed post that they cover the entire bed. Truthfully, I knew that I shouldn’t get involved with him. I couldn’t even keep a boring lawyer satisfied. Why would I ever think that a gorgeous, fun, sweet, loving man like Danny would ever be happy with just me. Especially when he has models or whatever coming onto him all the time. It’s just better this way.” The ache in the middle of my chest really needs to start going away dammit.
The scowl on Brad’s face would be intimidating if I didn’t know him so well.
He raises his index finger. “First of all, lawyers do nothing but lie for a damn living! He was bound to be nothing but a loser and a waste of time. You cannot base your next relationship on that shit-show. He was way too full of himself for someone who wasn’t even six foot.”
I smirk. “He was five-eleven and a half.”
“Please, that bitch was lying about that too. His ass was five-ten tops!”
“Second, sure he’s been with his fair share of women.” I can’t even hold in my snort at that one. Brad rolls his eyes. “Okay, okay, he was nothing but a whore. But that was younger Danny who was in the prime of his career. You can’t blame the man for taking what was freely thrown at him.” Brad defends.
“And that’s my issue!” I snap before picking up my wineglass again. “Women just throw themselves at him.”
“Maybe, but when you two were together, that man didn’t look at any other women.” It’s Brad’s turn to hold up his hand to keep me quiet. “And trust me, I was paying attention, you know that I was.” Can’t argue with that. “He never looked at another woman when you weren’t around. And when you were, his eyes tracked your every movement.” He chuckles to himself. “The only time that his eyes left you, was to glare at the other men who would look at you. And damn it is an impressive glare.”
“It doesn’t mean that he would stay faithful.” I say just to be petulant.
“True,” he nods, “but it also means that he could be. You’re the one ruining your own happiness and his.”
I take a sip and swish the cool liquid around in my mouth. I do this a few times, giving myself a few moments to collect my thoughts, before swallowing. “I’m just tired, Brad.” And that’s just the plain and simple truth. “I’m just so tired of getting the short end of the stick when it comes to love. I’m so tired of never being enough. I’m tired of giving everything that I have and getting nothing in return. Honestly, I just need to finally choose me. I need to protect my heart for once, even from the person that it wants the most.”
“For the record, I think that you’re making a mistake, but you know that I’ll support you no matter what.” I smile at him gratefully. “Even if you’re letting fear ruin something that would probably be amazing and life changing.”
I can feel my eye twitch. “Really, you had to add in that last part. You couldn’t just be fully supportive?” I huff.
He raises an extremely well-manicured eyebrow at me. “You act like you’ve never met me.”
Touché
Luckily, we spent the rest of the evening making dinner and watching trashy television. We made no mention of anything related to my love life. Which I was thankful about.
Well I was until I went to bed and have now spent the last two hours staring at my ceiling unable to fall asleep. Everything just keeps running through my mind, especially the first time that I realized that Danny and I had chemistry. Hmm, okay that’s not really right. We always seemed to have some sort of chemistry, even when we first met. But man, I didn’t realize that two people could sizzle.
Just thinking about that day at the gym makes me flush:
I drive Brad over for his training. He’s been making so much progress over the last few months. It makes my heart swell so much seeing how nice all of the guys here are to him. I mean lets face it, a lot of men don’t always feel overly comfortable around a gay man. Like he’s going to try to jump all of their bones or something. Trust me, most gay men have better and higher standards than the rest of us do.