He ignored me, turning into the old graveyard, and the closer we got, the sicker I started to feel.
I couldn’t do it.
He wasn’t gone.
He wasn’t fucking gone.
He finally parked and shut the engine off, turning to face me as sorrow filled eyes.
“I know you’re hurting, babe, but I promise this is the best way to start healing. You need to let him go.”
No.
I shook my head, slamming my eyes shut as the emotions started to rise, but he climbed out wordlessly and walked around to my side to unlock the door, opening it and gently pulling me from the pickup.
I fought him for a moment before my body sagged against him in defeat.
I was too tired, and my heart was hurting too badly.
I couldn’t do it, not yet.
“I’m not ready to be here. He’s not gone if I…”
“No amount of putting it off will bring him back. It’s been months, so I think you need a little push. C’mon, I’ve got you,” he promised without moving back from me.
I pulled back slightly, but after a moment I let him take my shaking hand and lead me through the graveyard until he stopped in front of a gravestone.
I refused to look up, but Diesel gently pulled me under his arm and spoke in my ear.
“I’ve been coming down here and keeping it tidy. I hope you like it, Donovan.”
I peeked up and tears instantly stung my eyes at the sight of the picture on the head stone.
I knew they’d used one of Slash and I, but actually seeing it was bittersweet.
My heart shattered into millions of pieces all over again.
He was dead.
He was really fucking dead.
“Do you want me to stay here with you, or do you want me to wait in the truck?” He offered softly, but I shook my head, clinging to him more tightly.
He couldn’t leave me.
He couldn’t.
“Stay, please,” I croaked out, relaxing when he didn’t move.
“Okay, babe. Take your time,” he murmured, kissing the top of my head as I stared ahead.
I felt too much at once, and I knew my voice shook as I spoke.
“He can’t be dead. I’m telling you, he was at Ty’s looking for me last night.”
He gave me a small smile, tenderness to his tone.
“If he was there, it was just his spirit finally saying goodbye to you. He knew you needed more time than the rest of us.”
How was this asshole so sweet all the time?
“You think?”
His smile was sad, but he nodded.
“Yeah. He hung around to make sure you were okay first. I think that’s what Sasha did with me too. They’re at peace, Donovan. Now it’s time for you to feel some peace as well.”
I held on tightly to him, letting the tears flow freely as my legs buckled and I finally let it all out as Diesel caught me, carefully dropping to the ground to cradle me on his lap.
He repeated it over and over again, letting me know it would be okay, but it wasn’t.
Nothing was going to be okay.
Not without Slash.
Diesel
My heart broke as I held Rory as she fell apart.
I’d seen her pretty messed up before, but this took the cake.
I just sat there and held her as tightly as I could, wishing I could put her broken pieces back together.
I didn’t talk as she cried it all out, knowing she’d bolt if I drew attention to the fact that she had emotions.
She was strong, but even the strongest fell hard at times, making me realize how much she’d needed this.
She clung tighter as I shifted my hold on her, but she should’ve known that I’d never leave her there to deal with it on her own, not after promising to stay.
I shut my eyes and rested my cheek on top of her head as her sobs wrecked me, her soul sounding like it was shattering right there in my fucking arms.
She couldn’t deny it anymore, not now.
I would’ve sat there all night with her if it meant I could start putting her back together, and something told me we would be sitting there for a while.
She had months of buried mourning to get out, and I’d be damned if I got in the way of that.
I wasn’t going to let her leave until she’d started to heal even the smallest amount.
I’d always have her back, just like I knew she had mine.
Right until the day that I died.
Rory
Diesel pulled up at the Devil’s warehouse later in the day, letting me out so I could pick up the Corvette.
I gave him a small wave as I headed inside, waving to anyone I passed on my way to the garage, but Marco suddenly stepped in front of me, slamming my back painfully into the wall.
“You fucking told them?!”
His eye was bruising, and I had to fight the urge to reach out and touch it.
I didn’t think it was a problem that the others knew we’d slept together, but after seeing his black eye, I was starting to think it was more trouble than it had been worth.
Fucking hell.
“I never said I’d lie to them, Mark. I’m single, so they can’t get upset that we fucked and…”
“Not about the fact that I fucked your tight cunt multiple times last night, I’m talking about the fucking powder. Why do you think he showed up on my doorstep and punched me in the fucking face and gave me this bruise a little while ago?” He growled, making me roll my eyes.
“Are you stupid? I didn’t rat you out, asshole. You gave it to me in full view of a fucking camera. Hunter knew, so he was pissed that I kept lying to him. I told you I wouldn’t tell on you for that. He told Skeeter this morning,” I replied flatly and gave him a small shove back.
The anger started to fade from his eyes, and he took a small step back to give me space.
“Serious?”
Simmered that down real quick.
“Serious, Mark. I…”
He suddenly kissed me hard, confusing the hell out of me.
I gasped, making him groan as my mouth opened and he pushed his tongue inside.
What the fuck just happened?
I went to push him back as my brain caught up to what was going on, but he was yanked back forcefully, making me blink as Skeeter stood beside us.
He was fucking murderous.
“So, this is your choice? You and I are fucking done?” He spat, shoving Marco to the side without a second thought.
No, no, no, no!
“Skeet, you don’t understand…” I started, but he slammed his fist into the wall beside my head and got in my face.
“What’s not to understand? We talked about this only a few fucking hours ago!” He barked, disgust and resentment filling his light green eyes.
He was going to put me in a hole for sure this time.
Marco cleared his throat, appearing confused by the argument.
“Ah, what’s going on, Skeet?”
Skeeter turned, sneering at him.
“You’d think the black eye told you enough, you stupid piece of shit. I’d put a goddamn bullet in you if you weren’t part of Hunter’s crew. I told Rory this morning that it was you or me, so she obviously made her fucking choice.”
Marco cringed, seeming uncomfortable, which I didn’t think was a regular emotion from him.