Once I can breathe once more, I quickly wash my hair before soaping up my body. Rinsing out my hair, I let the water run down my body to rinse the suds from me at the same time. Before getting out, I use conditioner in my hair. With it being longer, I’ve always used conditioner. I don’t want to sound like a pussy, but my hair has curl to it and is a mess if I don’t use it. As soon as I’m soap and conditioner free, I get out of the shower and dry off.
Wrapping the towel around my waist, I quickly comb out my hair before walking into my bedroom. Tossing the towel aside, I yank the blankets back and climb in bed. I’m sexually frustrated even though I just got off. Knowing Gwen is in my house, our home, causes my cock to remain in a constant state of hardness. It’s always been that way for me. That’s why I’ve used the house bunnies and random women when I’ve been out on the road or out with the guys.
Even though I was with the house bunnies and other women, it was never enough for me. They were just a means to an end to take the edge off before I did something stupid as hell. I didn’t know how to deal with my desire for Gwen, and that’s why I tried to work it out of my sister with the other women. It never worked though. They were never enough because they weren’t her. My biggest fear is hurting Gwen unintentionally because I take her too hard. Or before she’s truly ready to take that step with me. I know myself good enough to realize, one taste of her is never going to be enough. I’ll be with her every single second she lets me.
Closing my eyes, I try to fall asleep. I should be able to after the day I’ve had. I had to run from one business to another one all day long trying to troubleshoot problems going on. Then I went to the clubhouse to have some time with Playboy and the other guys. Not much was going on because the kids were around. We keep things to a minimum when they’re around. They don’t need to see things before they should.
Then we had our workout. Yes, I’m worked up from it, but I haven’t had trouble falling asleep before now. Tonight, sleep is not going to come to me. Picking up the remote from my nightstand, I turn on the TV making sure the volume is extremely low, so it doesn’t disturb Gwen. I flip through until I find an action movie. It’s one I’ve seen a million times, so I don’t really have to pay attention to what’s going on.
I’m not sure when I fell asleep, but the ringing of my phone jolts me awake. I grab it off the nightstand and don’t bother checking to see who it is.
“’Lo,” I grumble into the phone.
“Need you at the clubhouse an hour ago. Butcher has some trouble goin’ down and needs help. Five of you ridin’ out in twenty minutes. Rich is on his way there. He’ll be there in less than ten,” Slim informs me, hanging up.
Setting my phone back down, I get out of bed and pull clothes out of my dresser. Once I’m dressed, I make sure my bandana is in place before making sure my to go bag is ready to go. Who knows how long I’ll be gone this time? Butcher has been there for us, so we’ll always be there for him.
Before leaving the house, I make my way into Gwen’s room. She’s covered from head to toe in the middle of the bed. Leaning down over her, I gently kiss her on the forehead. She stirs, opening her eyes and looking up at me as I pull back from her.
“I gotta go, Sparrow. I’m not sure how long I’ll be gone this time. Rich will be here to watch over you. At night, I want you in my room so he can sleep in here. Take your things and move them into my room. When I get back, that’s where you’re stayin’. I want you in my space,” I gently demand since she’s more than half asleep. “I’ll call and message you when I can.”
“Okay, Killer. I love you,” she mumbles, instantly falling back to sleep.
My heart stops in my chest at her admission of loving me. There’s no way she knows what she just said to me. I’ll be reminding her the second I get back because I truly love Gwen. She’s my everything; my light, breath, fresh air, love, peace, and the only one I want when things are weighing me down. I will make sure Gwen believes me when I tell her I love her, that I’m not just saying the words to get what I want from her.
I meet Rich outside as he steps up on the porch. Looking him dead in the eyes, I make sure he knows what his job is.
“You watch over her and make sure she’s protected. Anythin’ happens to her, you’ll pay with your life,” I warn him, letting my voice ensure he knows I mean business. “You stay in my house. Tomorrow, if she needs help, you help her with whatever she needs. She’ll be movin’ her things to my room and you’re to stay in the room she’s been in. No funny business or I’ll cut your fuckin’ cock off and feed it to you.”
“I won’t do anythin’ you wouldn’t approve of. Is she workin’ still?” he questions me, so he knows what to expect.
“Nope. I’m out. I’ll check in when I can. If anythin’ happens, I want to know about it.”
Without saying another word, I leave Rich and make my way to my bike. Once my bag is stashed in my saddle bags, I straddle my girl and take off. I don’t waste any time getting to the clubhouse so I can find out as much information possible before we head out. It will take us a while to get to Butcher and his club. Whatever’s going on, I hope he can hang on that long.
Pulling up to the clubhouse, I don’t bother parking in my spot since we’ll be leaving in a matter of minutes. Walking through the door, I find Slim, Valor, Ghost, Playboy, Des, Wood, and Fox waitin’ on me. At least I believe I’m the one they’re waiting on. I walk right up to Slim so I can find out what’s going on.
“Someone took Butcher’s woman. She’s heavily pregnant and he’s got no clue who has her or where she is. You guys are flyin’ out to get there quicker. Fox is takin’ you guys to the airport,” Slim lets me know. “I don’t know how long you’ll be gone this time. Just help get her back.”
“On it,” I tell him.
We all head out. I stop by my bike long enough to get my bag before piling in the SUV with the rest of the guys. I’m left the front passenger seat because I don’t ride in the back. Never have and never fucking will. Fox gets us to the airport and leaves us there to board our plane. We all leave our weapons with him before he takes off. I also leave him a message to look after Gwen while I’m gone. He assures me he will since she’s his family. I trust him to keep his word when it comes to her.
Chapter Eleven
Gwen
KILLER HAS BEEN gone for the last three days now. All I know is he’s helping out another club and isn’t sure when he’ll be back. I do remember the morning he woke me up and told me he was leaving, when I was falling back asleep, I told him I love him. That’s not something I was ever going to be prepared to do. For now, I’m thankful he’s not here so I don’t have to face him on a daily basis because I’d run based on the humiliation coursing through my body.
He hasn’t said a single thing about it to me since he’s been gone either. We’ve talked on the phone a few times and he messages me when he can. Maybe I got lucky and even though I remember telling Killer I love him, hopefully he didn’t hear me. I could always get lucky enough for him to have already been out the door when I said it. Or, if he did hear it, I could always pretend not to know what he’s talking about. I’m not a good liar though.