That’s what I do now, in my alone time.
Something I’m blessed with a lot of.
Chapter 34
August 31
“Thanks,” I say again to Anthony as he helps carry the last of my computer equipment into my office. I didn’t want to ask him for help but the dizzy spell I had is lingering.
“No problem.” He leans on the door and sighs. “Feels good, right? Being back.”
“I’m excited to have all this out of my second bedroom.” I’ll give him that, but I’m not happy about leaving the apartment and the small life I have built up there.
“Yeah, the computers and files and stacks of paper in your personal space were so annoying. That and I need people. Thank God you introduced me to Shawnee. Not only is she the greatest person I’ve ever met, but I never would have made the summer without her. Anyway, you need to unpack and I have to organize my desk. See ya later.” He waves and walks out, seeming weirdly chatty and scattered today. I wonder how much coffee he’s had.
I finish setting up and putting my things away but notice it takes me a bit. As if I’m winded.
My head has been throbbing slightly more than normal. There’s a worry it’s stress. I put a notification in my phone for my physio appointment with Linnie after work today so I remember to tell her.
“Hey, girl.” Simone comes to the office doorway. She has a strange smile pasted on her lips. “How’s it going?”
“Good. How about you?” I ask, settling into my chair and praying the Advil kicks in to kill my headache.
“Good,” she has a high-pitched tone.
“What?” She’s hiding something.
“Nothing.” She waves me off but her tone becomes higher.
“Spill.” I point at her, demanding.
She glances out into the hall before coming in my office and closing the door. “I know you probably don’t want to talk about it but I am so sorry, Lil. I can’t believe that asshole. Matt is furious that he’s involved work people.”
“What? What work people?” My stomach twinges. What the hell could it possibly be now?
“Rod and Elaine, getting engaged.” She is outraged and I am stunned.
“Engaged?” I whisper. The twinge turns to something else and my headache worsens. My right eye twitches under the strain. “How do you know?” I ask, trying not to completely melt down on our first day back.
“Oh my God, you didn’t know?” It’s her turn to whisper.
“No.” I wait for her to explain.
“He sent out the invite a week ago. He invited a bunch of people from the office to the engagement party next week. It’s some outdoor bullshit event,” she seethes. “I am so sorry. I figured you knew already. Anthony was invited. Isn’t he dating your best friend?”
“Yeah, he—wow.” I sit back and let it hit. That was why he was so chatty and weird. I want to scream at Rod, call him selfish and foolish, but there’s no way I will give him the pleasure of that. So instead, I push it down.
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m glad you told me. I hate when everyone is talking behind my back.” My head pounds harder. It must be a stress headache.
“Just know, no one likes him and everyone thinks it’s tacky to invite people from work to this, considering you work here too.” She offers another worried stare.
“It’s fine. I swear. I’d rather know.”
“Okay.” She leaves my office and I hate that she feels awful.
My phone rings with a call from Sam. I answer it, not caring that I haven’t started work yet. “Hi,” I say, trying to sound happy.
“Is your physio with Linnie today? I could have sworn you said that yesterday.” His voice makes me relax.
“It is.”
“Okay, I’ll jog to the gym and work out and time it so we can ride back together. I was thinking about making penne with vodka sauce. If you want, we can do dinner at your place so Romeo doesn’t feel left out.”
I’m about to tell him I need to be alone tonight when Rod walks past the window in my office to the hallway. He looks in and waves casually, like we’re friends and he hasn’t just stabbed me in the heart. I can’t breathe.
My two months of getting over his betrayal and finding myself are gone. Down the drain. The pain is fresh as if it hasn’t dulled at all.
“Lil?” I realize Sam has been speaking and I missed something.
“Rod’s engaged.” It accidentally comes out.
“Engaged? Already? Jesus.” He pauses. “Wait—is he there?”
“Yeah,” I mutter.
“Give me ten minutes.” He ends the call and I have no idea what’s happening.
My heart hurts and my headache is so much worse.
Why did he need ten minutes?
A knock at my door lifts my gaze to find Matt there. He walks in. “Hi, Lil. How’s it going?” Matt asks, which is weird. He never asks how I am. He just gets to the point. Fortunately, he doesn’t wait for me to answer. He closes the door and gets right to it. “Listen, I have an opportunity here to move someone to Cape Breton. Rod’s not an ideal candidate because he has so many high-end clients here in the city.”
“Okay.”
“But if you say the word, he’s gone to Cape Breton and his high-end clients are dispersed amongst the others.”
Say yes.
Say yes.
Say yes.
“No.” I want so badly to say yes, but I can’t. If I have him moved it will show that he’s under my skin and making me crazy. My right eye twitches with the throbbing. I am stronger than this.
“You sure?”
“Totally. I don’t care what he does.”
“The guy’s a piece of shit.” Matt and his vernacular are eloquent as always. “Between me and you and whatever FBI guys are listening in on our cell phones, I’d like to kick the shit out of him in the parking lot. Me, him, a bat. I think about it sometimes.”
I laugh for lack of words. It isn’t as if I haven’t thought that as well.
“If I wasn’t his boss,” he says and purses his lips and blows his exhale out. “Anyway, glad to have you back in the office. You brighten my day, Lil.” He winks and leaves and I am more uncomfortable than I was when Rod walked past.
Was Matt flirting?
Was that ass kicking, bat wielding, you brighten my day, his idea of hitting on me?
My eyes draw to the ceiling. “God, please help me. I know we’re friends off this year but, girl, you gotta do this one thing. Don’t let Matt have a thing for me. Please. I can’t handle any more bull—stuff.” Swearing while asking for favors from God is probably a bad idea.
My office door opens again. I jump, seeing Janice’s smiling face. “Lil, you have a special visitor.”
“I thought visitors were banned,” I blurt.
She is beaming and blushing. She steps out of the doorway and lets Sam walk in. Her eyes land on his perfect ass in his scrubs.
“Hey,” Sam says coolly. As if he didn’t sprint here in his doctor costume. And of course he isn’t sweating from the run. “You forgot your lunch.” He holds up a cute black-and-white lunch bag I’ve never seen before in my life.