“Yes. I think we are family.”
I smiled at him, mentally cataloguing where I’d left the shot gun.
Well, this all made sense. I should have known there was no way a guy that hot and charming and thoughtful would crash into my life without some sort of catch. If I was being honest with myself, I had been waiting for the other shoe to drop since his clear blue eyes looked at me with longing. Men who looked like they fell out of magazines don’t fall for small town nurses in the Nowheresville, USA.
Why did I keep doing this? Why did I keep getting my hopes up only to have them dashed to the ground? Cheater Charlie must have broken my brain. He hadn’t broken my heart, but maybe I was really the crazy one because I felt like it was breaking right now. Like this farm, Sam felt like home. When he’d kissed me, I’d finally felt like I had somewhere to belong again. I’d been adrift since my mother died.
“Well, you go out to the barn to talk to Marv. The llama.” I puffed out my breath, blowing my bangs up and out of my eyes. “I will stay here and keep the fire up. Be careful out in the snow.” My tone sounded cold even to my own ears.
“You seem upset, Anna. What has changed? That kiss was amazing, yet I feel a shift in your mood.”
“Nope. Nuh-uh. I’m fine and dandy.”
“You are lying. Since our kiss, I can read your moods clearly. More so than before, and I already felt I knew you from the moment I saw you.”
The emotions rollercoastering in my chest had me squeezing my eyes shut. On the one hand, it had felt so right when we kissed; right in a way I didn’t even think could be real. But on the other hand, he said things that are so clearly out-of-this-world crazy, it shut me down again immediately. I can’t let myself open up to this level of hurt. I can’t—not again. Best to focus on the facts in front of me and not the feelings clouding my judgement.
I softened my smile. “You go catch up with Marv and I’ll be here.” With the shotgun.
The ache in my chest felt real, burning like true heartbreak. The hurt that Charlie had left me with was nothing in comparison to this feeling of desolation.
He rubbed a thumb over my lips before lowering his head to kiss me lightly. I closed my eyes at the feeling of rightness. It wasn’t fair. It shouldn’t feel this good. When he clearly . . . needed help. Help that I couldn’t provide.
“I will return shortly.” He moved to leave.
“Wait,” I said. I reached into the mud room for the old Carter jacket that hung by the door. “It’s so cold out there.” I breathed, inhaling his scent, forcing myself to believe it would be for the last time. I could not let myself get this close to him again.
I zipped him up before patting him lightly on the chest. The sadness must have been written across my face. He lifted my chin with a finger and gave me a half smile that made me knees quiver.
“I will be okay. The cold doesn’t bother me.”
“Humor me.” I wrapped a scarf around his neck.
His gaze, filled with innocent admiration, roamed over my face again. He was gaga for me. Literally.
Great. I sure know how to pick ’em.
He stepped out the back door and quickly disappeared into the dark night.
Maybe I shouldn’t have let him go. He didn’t even have a flashlight. But he hardly seemed to need it. A sudden sadness filled me at the sight of him leaving me. It felt wrong. But what did I know? My lady instincts were clearly way off base. I hadn’t even known this man a day and yet I felt like I was losing something important.
Focus on the facts, Anna.
He was going outside to talk to my llama. He said he can read my mind. And the way he speaks? He’s been off since he arrived. Focus on the facts.
I sighed and walked back to the living room to clean up the unused hot cocoa mugs.
My gaze fell back on the tree, lit up like a beacon in the darkness of the night. My sweet, gentle, crazy man.
I straightened up when there was a knock at the front door. I glanced toward the back door. There was no way he could have made it back already . . .
I grabbed the fire poker and stepped softly to the peephole to look out.
“Sunova . . .” I mumbled to myself. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” All of this was probably Charlie’s fault for breaking my brain and leaving me vulnerable tonight. Logically, I knew I was grasping at straws. But I was not in the mood for reason. I was in the mood to blame someone for this pain I felt, and somehow it made sense to blame Charlie.
Ha! Take that, logic!
10
Anna
I threw open the door. “Well, well, well. Hello, Doctor Charles McCheaterpants of the House Montgomery, First of His name, The Turdface, King of the Assholes and the Worst Men, Assgrabber of the Great Stars Crossing Hospital, Breaker of Promises and Father of, of, of—damn it!” I stomped my foot and resisted shoving him off the porch. “Fuck you, Charlie. What in the frickety-fracking hell shit do you want? Why are you here? Huh?” My hands itched to grab the shotgun hanging above the door. Now I had two reasons to need it. Having two reasons to shoot people was not good. I was seriously stressed out. “Well? What the fuck?” I screeched, not giving him a chance to speak.
“Calm down, Anna. I’m here to apologize and make sure you’re okay.” He held his hands up, as if I were a danger to him. “That’s it.”
Loosening my white-knuckled grip on the fireplace poker, I snorted and leaned into his face. “I do not accept. Get off my property.”
“Come on, Anna. How are you gonna do me like that? After all we went through?”
What we went through? What we went through was a few lame dates at the Stars Crossing Cafe and some awkward over the clothes pawing. He got off just fine but left me high and dry. I was too old to waste my time on guys like that. I played that disappointment game plenty in high school and college.
“You can leave now or get a poker where the sun don’t shine.” I slammed the tip to the deck.
“You’re acting crazy.”
“I’ll show you crazy.”
“You’re so funny. All bark and no bite.” He smiled at me like I was the runt of the pack that couldn’t stop chasing its tail.
“I’ll show—“
He craned his neck to look inside behind me. I pulled the door closer to my body. “I noticed you’re the only one for miles with any power. Lights are off all over town due to the storm. Did you know that?” he asked.
I did not know that. But he didn’t need to know that I didn’t know that. My power or lack thereof was none of his gosh damn business.
Before I had a chance to respond, his hands moved to my shoulders and firmly gripped. He stepped forward, causing me to stumble back slightly into the house. “I’m freezing out here. Aren’t you gonna let me in so we can talk?” His gaze flicked behind me like he was scoping out the place.
Okay. I was annoyed before, but now I was pissed. Nobody comes to my home and pushes me around. My fists balled at my sides.
“That’s it—“
But he wasn’t listening. He pushed me into the house, sticking his nose around my business. He looked to the decorated Christmas tree, then frowned.