“Nothing.”
“So last night was…”
“Nothing.” I shrugged.
“Doesn’t look like nothing from where I’m standing. It looks like you got yourself a stage five clinger.”
“She’s Hailee’s best friend,” I deadpanned.
“Never shit where you eat, man.” He slung his arm around my shoulder.
“It isn’t like that.”
“For you, maybe, but she’s got that look.” He glanced back again but I didn’t look, not this time. “And we both know you don’t need that shit right now.”
“Do me a favor, Grady?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut the fuck up.”
His expression fell. “Sorry, man, I’m just yanking your chain.” We moved up the line, loading our plates with barbecue. “Did you decide how to deal with the Thatcher problem yet?”
Shaking my head, I glared at him. Hard.
“Shit, my bad. I’m just concerned he’s going to lure you into doing something real fucking stupid.”
“Why don’t you worry about you and leave Thatcher to me, yeah?”
“Sure, Jase, I just—”
“Let. It. Go,” I hissed.
“Whatever you say, man.” He held up his hands. “This barbecue looks good.”
“So let’s eat.”
And forget all about Felicity and Thatcher.
After everyone had stuffed their faces, we all settled down again. The clink of Coach’s fork against his glass ushered everyone into silence. I pulled at the collar of my shirt. It felt like it was getting tighter by the second, squeezing the air from my lungs and making it difficult to breathe.
“You’ve got this,” Cam mouthed at me.
“Now that you’ve all filled your bellies, I’m going to handover to Jason. Before I do though, I wanted to take this opportunity to say a few words about this young man.”
Silently groaning, I buried my face in my hands.
“Jason Ford came to me an angry, hot-headed young man. He pushed every boundary I set, broke every record before him, and worked harder than any other player I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with. But with great talent comes great responsibility, and four years ago, if someone asked me if Jason had what it took to be QB One, I would have had to think about it.
“You see being quarterback requires leadership; it requires a player who understands the importance of teamwork, someone who calls the plays but might not always get the glory in the end zone. Jason had talent in spades. Still does. In fact, I’d go out on a limb and say I’ve never seen a senior player command the field the way Jason does.” His eyes landed on me and he gave me a nod of encouragement. “But talent is only part of it. If you want to go all the way, you have to keep your eye on the prize. You have to forget all the other crap off field, the rivalries and drama, the girls and parties. You have to leave all that at the door and give one hundred and ten percent every time you step out on the field. Jason isn’t perfect and he still has a way to go, but if anyone can go all the way, it’s him. Which is why I want to present Jason Ford the Rixon High School 2019 MVP and Coach’s Player of the Year Award. It has been my pleasure watching you grow into the player you are today, Son. Now you go out there and make Rixon proud.”
His compliment swirled around me, weighing heavily on my shoulders as I went to him, accepting his firm handshake and the two trophies. But Coach went one step further, pulling me into a hug. “I’m proud of you, Kid. Real damn proud. Just don’t forget where you came from when you go off and dominate the NCAA.”
“Thanks, Coach.” I stepped up to the lectern, adjusting the mic. “Hey everyone, I’m Jason.”
A few snickers rang out and Grady flipped me off.
Fucker.
“Coach asked me to say a few words, but public speaking isn’t exactly my forte. I prefer kicking ass on the field.”
The guys burst into hoots and hollers and Coach had to step in to quiet them down.
“Being QB One for the last four years has been a privilege. Football is my life. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do. All I can ever imagine doing. And I’m grateful to have had the opportunity to work with Coach and his team.
“But Coach is right; being a Raider is more than just football, it’s family, and I love you guys like brothers. Well, most of you; the jury is still out on Mackey.” I smirked at the sophomore watching me with hunger in his eyes. Hunger I remembered. He wanted to be me one day. To be standing here addressing his teammates, his brothers. But he was too distracted by the girls and parties and the god-like worship we received every time we walked the halls at school.
“Coach talked a lot about sacrifices.” My eyes found Felicity. “But when you want something bad enough, when it’s all you can see, there isn’t any price too high to pay. Mark my words Raiders, one day, it’ll be my name in the Hall of Fame. One day, you’ll all get to say you knew an NFL legend.”
It sounded arrogant; a pipe dream that might never come true. But I didn’t work in what ifs and maybes, I worked in hard facts. And I was going all the way.
No matter the sacrifice.
“Here he is, the man of the hour.” Dad grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into his side. “We’re proud of you, Son, real damn proud.”
I smiled tightly at the group of men gathered around my old man.
“Must be something, Kent, watching your kid follow in your footsteps.”
“It’s something all right.” His hand tightened. “The question is though, does he have what it takes to go all the way?” It came out lighthearted but I didn’t miss the lingering bitterness.
“Coach seems to think so, and I for one, am rooting for you, Jason.” Grady’s dad chimed in, tipping his beer in my direction. I gave him a small nod of appreciation.
“He just needs to learn to rein in his emotions. Take tonight for example...”
I tuned out, my teeth grinding behind my lips. I didn’t want to hear about how I messed up or how I threw away the team’s perfect season.
“Excuse me,” I said, shucking out of his grip. “But tonight is supposed to be a celebration, so I’m going to do just that, celebrate.” Stalking away, I didn’t expect to hear him call my name.
“Jason.” I turned slowly, narrowing my eyes on my old man. “I was just shooting the shit with the guys, you know how it is.”
“Whatever,” I grumbled.
“You’re annoyed.”
“I’m not annoyed, I’m just... It doesn’t matter.” I let out an exasperated breath.
“I think it does.” His audience had dispersed, leaving the two of us and a boat load of shit I didn’t want to deal with.
“You know,” he stepped closer, hands jammed deep in his pockets, “I remember what it was like to be young. To have the world at your feet. To think you’re invincible.” Pain flashed in his eyes. “But we’re all human, Jason. We all make mistakes.”
“You are such a fucking hypocrite,” I spat the words. “Standing up there tonight to talk about sacrifice and dedication and what it means to be a team.”