They get in formation as the crowd around me quiets down before the music starts and they bound into action.
Girls jump, dive, and somersault everywhere, it’s mesmerizing, but at no point do I take my eyes off my girl.
My girl.
My heart pounds as those words repeat in my head.
Fuck, I want them to be true.
The smile on her face as she does her thing melts my heart. I’ve never seen her so happy as she is right now, and it makes me determined to see her smile at me like that.
I have no fucking clue how I’ll achieve it. All I know how to do to make a girl happy is to make them come, but I’m sure I’ll figure a way.
My cock swells as I watch her move flawlessly across the padded stage. She’s so in sync with the other girls, I literally have no idea how they manage to coordinate it so well.
I have no idea how far through the routine they are but all of a sudden, one of the spotlights that are roaming around the crowd illuminates me.
My heart jumps into my throat, but I tell myself she’s too busy and focused to see me.
But when I look up, my eyes immediately lock with hers. Our connection only lasts for the briefest of moments, a nanosecond, but it’s still enough for me to see her shock, her horror at my being here.
Having said that though, nothing about her movements falter. If I couldn’t read her like I can, then I wouldn’t have a clue anything just happened.
But as it is, I can, and it just confirms what I already know.
I fucked up last night. Hell, I’ve been fucking up since I first stepped foot into Rosewood. But last night might have just been the icing on the cake. Although, I’m not sure being here right now helps all that much either. But there was no way I was missing this.
As the music comes to an end and they fall into their final positions, the crowd around me explodes with applause. I join them, but I don’t stand to my feet, instead, I sink down into my seat because I think my presence might not have the effect that Ruby wants right now while she hugs the rest of her squad, a huge smile plastered on her face.
I remain in my seat watching the other finalists perform, my interest in the competition waning by the second. I’m not surprised to discover that my sudden interest in cheer only exists when Ruby is bouncing around on the stage.
I almost get up and see if I can go and find her, but I don’t, not yet. I figure I’ll wait for the results to be announced and when they’re inevitably crowned champions, hopefully, she’ll be in such a good mood that she won’t just turn her back on me again. Optimistic thinking? Possibly.
30
Ruby
I stand with my right hand locked in Chelsea’s and my left in Harley’s as we huddle on the stage beside the other finalist squad waiting to hear our fate.
My heart is in my throat as I run through our performance again and again in my head.
It was perfect. Totally fucking flawless. Until I saw him in the crowd. The second my eyes locked on him, everything started to unravel.
My counting faltered and my timing was off but no matter what I did, I couldn’t get him out of my head and focus back on what I should have been doing.
Were we good enough to win this thing? The others were. They were on point, even after their late night. Harley might have seen me running across the pool area in my need to escape from Ashton, but the others stayed out there well past their midnight curfew.
I, however, fucked up and it’s all his fault.
Why is he even here? I can’t imagine he gives a fuck about cheer until he’s got a slut on her knees for him like I’m sure he had Krissy a few weeks ago.
Red hot fury fills my veins. Did he just come here to continue ruining my life? It seems all he’s done is make good on that promise since the threat first passed his lips all those months ago.
I scan the crowd, trying to see Mom and Stephen in the mass of faces but with the bright lights trained on us, it’s hard to see much. I do, however, point-blank refuse to look to where I saw him earlier.
I don’t care if he’s still here. I hope he’s not. I don’t need or want him here, no matter what the result of this is going to be.
Chelsea’s hand trembles in mine. She wants this so fucking bad and I’m terrified I’ve ruined it for her.
“And the winners of the medium varsity cheer nationals are...” The announcer pauses to build the tension as my stomach turns over. I swallow down my nerves, hoping that I’m not about to puke in front of all these people. “The Clift...” His words fade away as the blood racing past my ears gets too loud. I squeeze my eyes shut as tears fill them faster than I can control.
I try to release the hands in mine but they refuse to let go of me.
We lost. We fucking lost and it’s all my fault.
No, it’s all his fault.
My eyes spring open of their own accord and I stare at the place in the stands where I saw him earlier. I frantically search, needing him to know just what he’s done to me, but I don’t find him. All I find is an empty chair.
The asshole couldn’t even hang around to find out if he’d successfully ruined everything.
I’m in a total daze staring at that chair when Harley tugs on my arm and pulls me into a tight hug.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” I whisper in her ear. Her body tenses against me.
“What the hell are you talking about, Rubes? We just got runner up at nationals, that’s fucking epic.”
When she pulls back, she’s got a wide smile on her face. While I can’t deny that we’ve just done well, we have, it’s just... we should have won. We were good enough. They were good enough.
“We should have won,” I say sadly.
“Hey, there’s always next year,” she says brightly, her smile not faltering, that is until her eyes meet mine once more. “Rubes, what’s wrong?”
“Chelsea doesn’t have next year.” I glance at where she’s pulling Aria into a hug and my tears spill over.
I fucked this up. I fucked up her dream.
“Ruby,” Harley screams as I run from the stage.
I crash through the door leading from the stage toward the locker rooms where all our stuff is.
My lungs burn by the time I get there and my hands tremble as I frantically pull my stuff from the locker.
I need to get out of here. I can’t be here.
I pass crowds of cheerleaders, their coaches and family and friends but I don’t see anyone in my need to escape.
I fly through the exit that will lead me toward the main doors and finally outside when someone grabs my arm and I’m forced to stop.
I’m pulled back and I stumble, too stunned by being caught to find my footing and I crash into a solid chest.
A familiar scent fills my nose and my entire body stiffens with anger. My teeth grind and my fists curl.
“Ruby?” he whispers as if he’s talking to a scared animal.
“Why are you here?” I seethe, finally looking up into his dark eyes. But unlike I’m used to, they’re not angry, they’re full of... concern?
“I came to support you.”
“Bullshit,” I spit at him, trying to rip my wrist from his vise-like grip. “You don’t care about me, about how I, or the squad, do. You’re probably laughing inside right now because we came in second.”