The butterflies are starting to take flight in my stomach. It’s so intense I feel like they’re going to fly out my mouth. I take a deep breath, flip my hair over my shoulder, and peek at myself in the mirror before heading downstairs. Vance is sitting at the island, which takes me by surprise. I walk around him. "What are you doing up so early?"
"I got shit to do," is all he says. Mom turns, giving him the stink eye. "Sorry. I got things to do," Vance repeats. He turns to me and asks, "Chase picking you up this morning?"
"Yeah."
"He's been acting weird lately. He say anything to you?"
"No, why would he say anything to me?" Nervous laughter escapes me.
"I don't know. He mentioned that girl, Nic, the other day. Things didn't seem to be going so well, and he's just been off since. You’re a girl...some days. Just thought he might ask your opinion or something." I smack his shoulder and grunt, "No, he hasn't."
"Okay," He knocks on the table and stands up, "I'm off." He struts out the kitchen and, only seconds later, the front door slams.
"You're on your own this morning. I didn't make anything," Mom informs me, but I already guessed that. There didn’t seem to be anything cooking, and the kitchen didn't smell like yummy goodness.
"That's okay. I'm not that hungry." I reach for a banana laying in the wire basket in the center of the island. "This will work," I say, peeling it and then taking a bite.
"I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that you're this ‘Nic’ your brother just mentioned." My chewing slows, and I glance up at her. "Why would you think that?"
She arches her eyebrow. "So, has it gotten serious now?" she questions.
"No. Actually, I'm not even sure. He played it off like I was misconstruing things. Like I was some dumb young girl. I haven't talked to him in two days," I tell her.
"Baby, put yourself in his shoes. I can't imagine that being an easy situation for him."
"What do you mean?" I ask, slightly annoyed. "I didn't put myself out there, he did! He went out of his way to flirt with me, to get my number, to text me, then BAM I'm just some little girl who misunderstood?"
"He got scared," She pauses and then laughs a little. "Did I ever tell you about what your uncle did to your father?"
"No, I don't think you have."
"Chase reminds me of your father." I make a face at that comment. "Stop," She scolds and continues, "Your uncle Tommy threatened your father. He avoided me for a couple of days until I approached him and made him talk to me. He was scared. And I only have one brother. You have four, whom Chase is all friends with. Look at it from his way."
"I get that, I do. But he made me feel so childish and I do not appreciate that."
"Be honest with him. No one said you have to make it easy on him. A little groveling is good. Your father bought me flowers for a week straight. I forgave him the second I found out what happened--what your uncle did--but he didn't have to know that."
I laugh. "Thanks, Mom."
There's a knock at the door and both our heads turn, slightly confused at who would be knocking now. I look at the clock. It's not quite seven yet. I slide off the stool and move toward the door and peek out the side window. A large silver truck sits out front, no doubt Chase’s. Hm. He's early. I pull the door open to reveal him standing on my doorstep, looking way better than I last remember. He's wearing a maroon button-down shirt and black slacks. I scan his face as a small smirk plays on his lips, his blue eyes shining brightly.
"You're early," I point out.
His smile widens. "I am, for good reason. Can I come in?" I move back, allowing him to cross the threshold and close the door behind him.
"Grab your bag, please. I'd like to talk to your mom quickly. Privately."
"What?" I question, clearly confused. "About what?"
"You'll find out soon enough. Go get your things," he says moving past me into the kitchen and I watch as Mom pulls him into a hug. I want to eavesdrop but I realize I left my bag in my room, so I rush up the stairs, and back down. They're talking too low for me to hear, and his back is facing the kitchen's entrance. I huff to myself, and take a seat on the stairs, anxiously playing with my hair until he appears in front of me.
"Ready?" he questions, putting out his hand.
"Yeah." I place my palm in his warm one, and he gently pulls me forward until I'm standing.
"Okay, let's get going then." He keeps a hold of my hand, pulling me along behind him. It seems like a friendly hand holding, not the intimate kind where your fingers are threaded together. "Bye, Mom!" I yell before closing the door behind me.
Chase opens the passenger door for me, helps me up into the truck, and closes the door before heading around to his side. He's never done that before. This is...different. He hops up, and starts the truck before looking at me. "Thank you for letting me take you to school."
"It's not like I had much of an option, you told Taylor she wouldn't have a vehicle if she didn't agree to your terms," I retort.
"Yeah, I did. I don't regret it." His eyes move away from mine.
"What did you say to my mom?" I ask as he steers the truck down my driveway.
"I'll get to that. But first, I'm sorry." He pauses. I don't know if he's waiting for a response--or if he's going to say more--but when he doesn't say anything, I decide to.
"You made me feel stupid."
"That was never my intention. At all. I hate myself for that. You are not stupid, you are one of the smartest girls I've ever known. I'm the stupid one. But look, I've done a lot of thinking these past two days. One thing that is for certain are my feelings for you."
His admission causes my breath to hitch. I definitely assumed...but he never confirmed them. To hear the words straight from his mouth is almost like a shock. He glances at me and places his broad hand on his chest, “They’re here.” My anger instantly melts away. He looks back at the road. "I tried to push them away, to turn these feelings off, but there's no off switch. What I feel is real, and they're not going away."
"Why would you try to fight it? You have to know that the feelings are mutual."
He nods with a smile. "Yeah, and that made it harder to try and do the right thing."
"The right thing?" I question.
"You know Vance has been one of my closest friends since....forever. He is so protective of you--and rightfully so. We're guys, and guys are looking for one thing." I cross my arms over my chest, somewhat annoyed by his admission. "But sometimes a girl will take you by surprise, and they're all you think about. They can start as a friend, and you just want to be around them all the time. Slowly, the feelings evolve until it's so much more than sex."
He pauses to look at me, so I dare to question, "And I'm that girl?"
We're a block from the school when he abruptly pulls over to the side of the road. Putting the truck in park, he turns to me. His eyes scan my face. He reaches out to pull my hand from my lap and I allow him to infuse his fingers with mine. There's a ‘zing’ in my heart that’s touching me to my very core.