“I couldn’t,” she whispers as she grabs my hand and starts down a hall where all the club members’ rooms are. As soon as we get to the last one, Victoria pulls a key out and unlocks the door.
Stepping into the room, I make sure the door is locked before looking around her room here. Everything in the room seems like her, but at the same time, it doesn’t. This is a side of her I’ve been denied and it pisses me the hell off. I fuckin’ love this woman and yet I don’t know who the hell she really is.
More than anything, she’s lied to me.
“James,” she murmurs as she turns to face me, sadness showing in her eyes.
Putting my hand up, I stop her from saying anything just yet. I shake my head and walk toward her bed. I need to lay down before I collapse. Removing my cut, I put it on the back of a chair as I pass it. My shirt is the next to go and, fuck, it takes everything in me to get it off. I sit on the edge of the bed and bend to take my boots off, but Vi stops me.
“Let me, please,” she says as she kneels on the floor. Lifting one foot, she takes one boot off before doing the same to the other foot. Once they’re off my feet, she slides her hands up my legs to my stomach and she gently pushes until I lay back. Unbuckling my belt, she unbuttons my pants and slides the zipper down. I lift my hips enough for her to pull them down.
Neither of us says anything as she strips my pants from my body. Nor do I say anything when she doesn’t move from kneeling in front of me, preferring to stare at the ceiling.
“I didn’t want to have to be this person again,” she finally says so softly I’m not quite sure I heard her right.
“The day I escaped with Raven I knew what I was giving up. It was either leave and have a chance at a life or succumb to being a prisoner, and potentially die at the hands of those who were money hungry. I couldn’t do it. So I ran and in doing so I let Raven and her dad, Fury, teach me how to be the person I’ve become when I shut down. My brother, Chains, he was pissed when he first learned Fury taught me to be what I am. Then he found out how good I am and for the first time, I felt I was doing something. On my days off from Dolly’s Playhouse, I handled jobs when I felt one was worth my shutting down.” Victoria stops talking and I sit up to stare down at her taking in the vulnerability in her eyes.
“When you were shot, I couldn’t deal. Blaze called Raven thinking she could console me not knowing what Raven would do. Sh-she knew the only way I’d calm down was to shut it all down, and that’s what I did when she told me to. I sat there in the hospital, my mind racing. I knew who caused this and all I could see was your blood all over me. It was then I decided to end this once and for all,’ she says tears streaming down her cheeks.
“Vi . . .” I murmur.
“No, James, don’t you get it? If not for me, you wouldn’t have been shot. I heard her tonight admit it too. I wasn’t the target they were after. They won’t stop until they get to me. All they want is money and power. All of which I can give. It’s why they had Luna to impersonate me. To attempt to get what they want in a way to draw me out. Bad things happen to everyone around me. Don’t you get it. I need to end this, so I know without a doubt you’ll be safe. As well as everyone else. Because if something happens to one of you, I couldn’t handle it.”
Leaning forward I grab her arms and pull her up into my arms. “Come here Vi,” I say as I do my best not to cause more pain to my body.
I pull her up onto the bed and lay down with her in my arms as I let what she’s said soak in. Vi never wanted to do this again and yet she did it for me. Chains had said she hadn’t shut down in well over six months. Pretty much she hasn’t become Silent Night since we started. She’d finally been happy and wanted to give it all up. But because of them shooting me she blames herself.
Fuckin’ hell.
“It’s gonna be okay, Sweetness,” I murmur, kissing the top of her head. “I’ll make sure they don’t hurt anyone ever again. That I promise you. Your soul will never be darkened by their deaths. Remember, I own your heart, Vi, just as you own mine. I fought death to get back to you, now I’ll fight to keep your soul from darkening. We do this together,” I say, meaning every word.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Victoria
“I fought death to get back to you, now I’ll fight to keep your soul from darkening. We do this together.” Tracker's words last night play on repeat as I wake up. I cried myself to sleep last night in his arms and slept longer than I have since before he’d been shot.
Lifting my head up off his shoulder I take in how peaceful he looks before lowering my gaze to the bandage covering the spot he’d been shot. Placing a kiss to his shoulder I trail kisses along his body being careful to avoid the bandage. I know he can’t do anything with me right now, but I need to feel a connection to him again.
Lowering the covers, I slide further down until I’m eye level with his dick. I wrap one of my hands around his thickness and I look up to Tracker’s face as he groans. Finding his eyes closed I know he’s awake, but he’s allowing me to have this moment.
Turning my attention back to what I’m doing, I begin to slowly stroke him as I lean forward to take him in my mouth. I’ve always loved sucking on him every chance I had and now is no different as I bob my head up and down his thickness. Tracker groans encouraging me to take him deeper.
“Fuck, Sweetness, don’t torture me and suck my cock all the way,” Tracker groans huskily, his hand tangling in my hair as he begins to guide me to do what he wants me to. “Take me down your throat baby,” he orders.
I do as he commands knowing how much he loves it when I do this to him. Taking him as far as I can I repeat this until I feel he’s about to come. Pulling back to twirl my tongue around the head before sliding him all the way back down my throat and his dick twitches as he comes. Tracker’s hand holding me in place, I take everything he gives me.
As his grip in my hair loosens, I lift my head to look up at him.
“Sweetness, that was one hell of a wake-up call,” he grins down at me.
“How are you feeling?” I ask.
“Much fuckin’ better now that I’ve had your mouth wrapped around my cock,” he murmurs as he motions for me to slide back up.
Doing so I lay my head back on his shoulder as Tracker holds me to him. He uses his other hand to rub my stomach.
“We still have a lot to talk about, baby,” he says softly.
“I know we do,” I rasp.
“I meant what I said last night Vi. We do this together. You’ve done a lot of the work so far. Let us do the rest. I promise you they will not get off easily. I will make them all suffer,” he declares.
“How is that us doing this together?” I ask, his plan not seeming fair to me. I am who I am, and I want to be as much a part of ending this as I am in anything.
“Sweetness, you’ve already done the surveillance and know everything we’re gonna need to know to get this shit done. Hear me out, Victoria, before you go getting pissed with me,” he states giving me a squeeze. “You tell all of us everything there is to know about getting to both your parents and Parker. We get them and bring them here. From there you can determine whether or not you want to be a part of their deaths. In my opinion, I’d prefer you not be.”