Drake felt his teeth grind together. “I did what I did because she begged me to,” he defended himself and her, knowing that despite what had happened, it had been important for Leonora to go back to the place from whence her nightmares sprang. Although he himself had not approved, he had understood. “She needed to confront her demons, and she did.”
Her brother inhaled a slow breath, something contemplative coming to his gaze.
Drake sighed, no longer in the mood to continue this confrontation. “She needed this,” he began, trying his best to explain without antagonizing his visitor. “Past mistakes have a way of reaching into the present and keeping us from moving forward.” For a moment, a spark of understanding flashed in the other man’s eyes. “I never left her side. I swear it. She was never in any danger. I would never have allowed that to happen.”
For another moment, Leonora’s brother held his gaze before he turned away and walked over to the window, gazing out at the street. “Why do you wish to marry her?”
Drake closed his eyes, knowing that if he could not say it now, he might never be able to. Still, a small voice deep down whispered that risking his heart was dangerous, potentially crippling and utterly devastating. Yet, without Leonora, Drake knew that his heart would never again feel alive in the way it did when she was near. “Because I love her.” A moment of shock followed those words. Drake felt it as though lightening had struck him, his muscles tensing painfully as his breath lodged in his throat. However, the tension quickly dissipated, and in its place remained nothing but peace and calm.
Leonora’s brother turned to look at him. “And you intend to ask for her hand?”
Drake nodded. “When you arrived, I was on my way to change and then head over to call on her.”
The other man nodded. “I’m afraid you might be too late.”
Drake flinched as though someone had struck him. “Pardon?”
Leonora’s brother inhaled a deep breath, his gaze assessing before he spoke. “As we speak, my sister is in Hyde Park, riding with Lord Gillingham.” He lifted his chin. “I have it on good authority that he intends to ask for her hand.” His brows rose, a daring gesture, demanding to know what Drake intended to do about it.
Drake felt like putting his fist through the wall. He could not imagine anything worse happening. Had he not stayed awake all night in order to speak to Leonora before she could speak to Gillingham?
But then he had fallen asleep. Had that been the Fates stepping in and guiding them down different paths? Or had it merely been a coincidence, one that perhaps need not change the course of their lives?
For an endless moment, Drake stared at the other man, wishing that he had misunderstood, wondering if he might be dreaming. Nonetheless, when the truth and meaning of this moment finally sank in, Drake knew what he had to do.
Without another word, he spun on his heel and charged for the door.
“Pemberton!”
Gritting his teeth, Drake jerked open the door, then turned to look over his shoulder.
“If you hurt her,” Leonora’s brother said calmly but menacingly, “I will end you.”
Drake could not help a smile from fighting to the surface. “I’m glad to hear it.”
Then he charged down the hall, hoping he would not be too late.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
An Unwelcome Proposal
The sun shone brightly, its golden rays in stark contrast to the dark cloud hanging above Leonora’s head. She tried to smile and speak with enthusiasm; still, the revelations of the past night still lingered.
It is you I want!
Oh, she had been daring to speak her mind, and yet, it had brought her nowhere. Drake had seemed deeply shocked at her words, no doubt overwhelmed by her sudden revelation. Perhaps it was safe to say that he did not return her affections, at least not in the same manner. No doubt, he cared for her, but he did not love her.
“You are a most proficient horsewoman,” Lord Gillingham commented, an affectionate smile upon his face as they rode down the path side-by-side. “Is there anything you cannot do?”
Leonora forced a kind smile upon her face, reminding herself that her companion had had no hand in her current predicament. “You’re most kind, my lord.” Nevertheless, she needed to tell him, to let him know that she could not marry him.
Not now.
Not ever.
Casting a look over her shoulder, she spotted Harriet and Christina racing their mounts across the lawns nearby. She knew they would not stray far, but merely allowed her some privacy to speak to Lord Gillingham.
“You seem absent-minded,” her companion remarked as they neared the small grove, its trees casting long reaching shadows. “Is something wrong?”
Leonora could barely bring herself to look at him, afraid to see his face fall, to know that she was the one who had hurt him. He deserved better for he had always been most kind to her. “I am fine,” she told him with another insincere smile. “Please do not worry about me.”
Lord Gillingham gave a short nod, then urged his gelding closer to her, a determined look coming to his eyes. “Lady Leonora, I must confess I invited you here today to put a question to you.” The corners of his mouth quirked upward, and Leonora felt her heart drop into her stomach.
“My lord, if I may—”
“As I’ve said before, I hold you in the highest esteem,” he continued on, seemingly unaware that she had tried to interfere. “Never have I encountered a lady more suitable to my own disposition and interests than you, Lady Leonora. I believe wholeheartedly that a union between us would be beneficial to my happiness as well as yours.”
Leonora’s hands tensed upon the reins as a shiver danced down her back. “My lord, please I must tell you—”
Lord Gillingham pulled his mount to a halt, then turned to look at her, a bright smile upon his face. “Lady Leonora, would you do me the honor of accepting my hand?”
Leonora felt ready to faint. Indeed, she ought to have insisted he listen to her. Now, she had to refuse his proposal, instead of simply letting him know that she had no intention of ever marrying. “My lord, I do thank you for your kind proposal.” She lifted her eyes off her hands and forced herself to look at him. “However, what I meant to tell you earlier was that…I have no intention of taking a husband…ever.”
His brows slowly drew down into a puzzled frown. “Pardon me?”
Leonora inhaled a deep breath. “We are all different in our ways, and I believe that I am not the kind of woman who desires marriage. My refusal of your kind proposal has nothing to do with you, I assure you. Indeed, any woman would be most fortunate to call you husband.”
His jaw tensed. “Then why do you refuse me?” His frown grew ever darker. “Is there another?”
Taken aback by his insistent questioning, Leonora knew not what to say.
“What woman does not seek marriage?” Lord Gillingham demanded, urging his mount closer still. “Any proper woman knows that there is no greater honor than securing a suitable husband.” Something dark came to his eyes as he regarded her, a sneer curling the corners of his mouth. “Why would you dishonor your family so? If not marriage, what is it that you seek?” His gaze raked over her from head to toe, and Leonora felt a painfully familiar sensation settle in her stomach, something sickening and repulsive.